Down the Chimney with a Shotgun

Right, well I have to admit that I wasn't exactly harboring a whole lot to this 2022 movie titled "Down the Chimney With a Shotgun". But since it was a movie that I had not already seen, much less even heard about, of course I opted to sit down and give writer and director Ryan Cavalline's movie a fair chance.

The storyline in the movie was simplistic. Nothing outstanding or particularly memorable. Had I known that this was a horror anthology, I might have skipped on it, as I have an aversion towards horror anthologies. Why? Well, they tend to be pretty bad. And in all fairness, I have seen worse scripts in other movies, so that at least counted for something in favor of writer and director Ryan Cavalline's effort here.

Needless to say that I wasn't familiar with the cast ensemble in the movie, but the acting performances in "Down the Chimney With a Shotgun" were bad. So very, very bad. It was like watching Amateur Night at the local middle school. And that definitely took away from the overall enjoyment of the movie.

The special effects in the movie were dubious. Especially the blood spray, that was just laughably bad.

Well, at least they were trying their best, I suppose. But as for "Down the Chimney With a Shotgun" being an enjoyable movie, don't count of it. Some of us suffered through this, so you don't have to. You're welcome.

My rating of "Down the Chimney With a Shotgun" lands on a very generous two out of ten stars.

After escaping from an insane asylum, a crazed convict takes a woman hostage and regales her with tales of Christmas Folklore from around the world.

The Good Stor(ies): The Legend of Hans Trapp-A couple going through a slew of marital problems manage to invoke the spirit of Hans Trapp, a savage killer better known as the dreaded Christmas Scarecrow. This was a pretty enjoyable start for this type of story. Mostly centered around the justifiable antics he commits that sets her off on the need to take her revenge on him following the interaction and influence of the titular scarecrow which is given a solid backstory explaining everything. This is all brutal enough and has some fun moments with how it all plays out, while the low-budget origins here involving the effects or weird animated scenes intercut into the storyline that disrupt the flow somewhat offers the main drawbacks.

Santa's Little Scalper-Trying to get better in life, a man finds himself under the spell of a special doll that was made for the children whose behaviors needed extra attention. Overall, this was fine for what it is and has some fun factors about it. The main storyline involving the creepy and demented looking doll interrupting his life and trying to insert its influence over him has a rather fun psychological effect the more it carries on. That helps to make his pathetic and lonely existence feel that much more terrifying when we realize the effect this has, while the overly familiar setup that once again offers a doll warping the mind of someone in its possession as the central storyline that doesn't feel too original in the long run as the main point holding it down.

The Bad Stor(ies): Christmas Hell-Awakening in a strange environment, the murdered husband finds that even Christmas holds its own judgment during the holiday season. There wasn't a whole lot to this one that seems to work. The overall concept of a person stuck in a purgatorial afterlife-like situation based on the time of year that they died is a genuinely unnerving and creative concept that works quite well, especially with the visuals here echoing a mental torment that ties in nicely with the psychological mind-games usually associated here. It's just so rushed in this type of format that it's hard to realize effectively what a majority of this is supposed to mean, and with a cheap look that comes off throughout here all holds this one down.

Frau Perchta - The Terrifying Christmas Witch-Staying at a remote bed-and-breakfast, a lonely man meets the kooky owner that spurs his interest in a figure who is best known for her gruesome punishment of the sinful during the Christmas Holiday. This one was somewhat of a disappointment overall which could've been much better. The central setup offering a fine introduction of the figure gives us the backstory necessary due to the obscure nature of everything which helps to make the rest of the time here featuring the owners' obsession with the perfect cookie or the little ticks that signal the involvement of the titular figure needing to be involved in his life. This is the weak link as it's more of a punchline than anything and is ruined by the CGI bloodspray, but it's still pretty fun otherwise.

Le Pere Fouettard-Awakening in a distressed state, a woman finds that she's captured by the French Christmas Cannibal who ate children. This was a somewhat disappointing finishing story to end things on. The backstory on the particular killer and his history working in the traditions of the holiday seem like it would be a fun enough feature on its own much like the scenario presented here involving the woman kept captive by the killer which is all good enough. That gets undone by the fact that it's just too short to get anything accomplished here and never has the chance to spell anything out about their names, why she's captive, or even a connection to the beginning story. Combined with the budgetary limitations featured here and it's somewhat disappointing.

Rated Unrated/R: Graphic Violence and Graphic Language.