Noise

Super boring and pointless, as most reviewers noted. I can believe that some people liked the movie - different strokes and all that - but I cannot believe that all the 10-, 9- , and 8-star reviews posted around the same time are legit. I absolutely HATE it when people are enlisted to goose the ratings of terrible films. Why not just make a better film and not subject people to yours if it sucks? (sigh)

With 30 minutes remaining of "Noise," I realized there still wasn't a single point of action or suspense. The rude reactions of people in the village when the wife came around was interesting, but then the matter was just kinda dropped. And then, for some inexplicable reason, the wife got all angry at the shopkeeper - the only person who was at all welcoming.

There were a few "spooky" sight gags, but none of them figured into a larger story. I could give specifics, but don't want to risk people not reading my review due to spoilers and making the mistake of tuning into this turkey.

Oh, and that baby cried all the time. He'd drive me nuts, too. That baby sucked.

I stumbled upon the 2023 Dutch mystery thriller titled "Noise" by perusing the Netflix catalogue of movies. And with this movie, from director Steffen Geypens, being a brand new movie that I hadn't already seen, of course I opted to watch it.

The synopsis sounded interesting enough to catch my attention. However, I didn't know what to expect from writers Steffen Geypens, Robin Kerremans and Hasse Steenssens.

However, the storyline was rather slow paced, dull and monotonous. Running at 89 minutes, there was surprisingly little of any worth taking place on the screen. There was nothing scary, nor were there the least bit of thrills or excitement either. And that made for a rather boring movie experience.

Given my limited exposure to the Dutch cinema, then I wasn't familiar with a single actor or actress on the cast list. The acting performances in the movie were fairly okay, though the performers had very little material to work with.

Visually then you're not in for anything grant or exciting. But then again, since there was nothing thrilling or scary in the movie, then there really wasn't much use or necessity for special effects.

"Noise" was a swing and a miss of a movie. And believe me when I say that I am never returning to watch this movie a second time, because it was struggle to sit through it the first time. If you enjoy a good mystery thriller, then there are far, far better movies out there to pick from.

My rating of "Noise" lands on a very generous three out of ten stars.

This movie could have been so many things.

It could have been what secrets the town holds for the son who has come back.

It could have been the secrets of the factory fire.

It could have been about the secrets of the father and his previous wife.

It could have been the slow descent of a marriage.

But no, the director/writer teased several ideas, and just tacked on a nonsensical ending that did not resolve any of the questions. This was a complete waste of time. Throw in the fact that the lead actor graduated from the Kneau Reeves/Kristen Stewart acting class, meaning he had the same constipated expression regardless of the scene or emotion he was supposed to have.

I wasn't going to review, but then I saw all these people raving about it and realized....if real people don't leave honest reviews, movies like this end up with inflated scores that make no sense.

This movie is a hot mess.

It attempts to carry off two parallel plots but it doesn't, really, do justice to either. The "twist" isn't actually a twist so much as a bait and switch kind of thing, where you're led to believe the big mystery is the main plot, and then toward the end you realize it was merely a device to illustrate the main characters deteriorating mental health. And, you also discover, the actual plot is something that's only been hinted at (main characters relationship with his father), which they're going to withhold a key detail on until the end.... I guess as some sort of weak explanation for the ninety minutes of SCREECHING crying baby and shenanigans you've endured.

Maybe it would have benefitted from some flashbacks, IDK. At the end of the day, it didn't do enough to make me care about any of the people involved....and it definitely didn't make me care enough that I wanted to do the work to figure out two thinly stretched together plots.

But, I mean, at least Ward Kerremans is fun to look at.

Even watching it at 1.5x speed and skipping 10 seconds every time the movie is boring and draggy. The supposed mystery is ridiculous, the protagonist is a terrible actor and there are a series of scenes of people in the city being hostile that make no sense and are not even explained. One of the worst scripts I've seen in a while, if there ever was a script. I assume that maybe there were more scenes but the movie got so much more boring that they must have cut it because there's a lot of nonsense. All in all, one of the worst movies I've ever seen. Don't waste your time, watch any 1959 Twilight Zone episode that in 25 minutes has more emotion and mystery than this movie pastiche.