Sex

Admittedly I don't know much about Norway nor I have watched many Norwegian films, and I know this one film couldn't be representative of the nation's social milieu... Yet, I must say the emotional intelligence and calmness this film portrayed was most impressive for me.

Depending on where you're from or what you stand for, the subject matter of 'Sex' might be uncomfortable for you. 2 straight married guys in their 40s - one just had a spontaneous sex with a male client, and the other, a Christian no less, feels something unraveling in him with the recurring dreams about David Bowie looking at him 'as if he were a woman'. Imagine they talk about it with each other and with their wives. In almost any other countries, I could picture scenes of shocks, emotional outbursts, quarrels, accusations or denial - dramas in other words.

It's different in Norway, or at least in this film. People are willing to talk and willing to listen without attempt to defuse, contradict, argue, intimidate or emotionally manipulate. The 2 protagonists aren't even intellectuals. They are chimney sweepers (I imagine it's considered as professionals in their own right, nevertheless more manual labourers). But even when they interact with each other, there's no usual put up of blocky masculine display. In every interaction with each character, they all seem to calmly meet each other on the eye level without having to play the expected social role.

The overall presentation of the film adds to that quality. The film is almost entirely consisted with scenes of conversations and the cityscape shots in between. All the conversations are shot in long takes with just occasional shift of angles or zoom ins and outs, showing the conversation and expressions in real time. What is said itself also remains very realistic, with occasional fumble with words or backtracking of thoughts. With no flash cuts, scene changes or dynamic camera moves, the film gently encourages its audience to join in the conversation and listen, rather than get emotionally stimulated and react.

I'm not saying it's all perfect in Norway. There are emotional distress that words cannot fully express, there are moments of hypocrisy, broken communication, and ultimately the inability to fully understand each other. Nor you may not fully agree with the situation and the message of this work. But the mature attitude 'Sex' shows in human interactions was by itself touching and represents something we all should learn in this time of extreme polarity and instant stimulus everywhere.

Norwegian films are on the rise. Years ago the only Norwegian film I knew of was "Insomnia" (1997, Erik Skjoldbjaerg) and most people would probably only know that this is the original of the remake of Christopher Nolan from 2002. After that Joachim Trier broke through (" The worst person in the world", 2021) and this year I saw "Quisling, the final days" (2024, Erik Poppe) only to discover that this director was far from a debutant but already active since 1998.

My newest Norwegian discovery is Dag Johan Haugerud. Recently he has made a trilogy called the Oslo trilogy. An ambitious project first because Joachim Trier also made an Oslo trilogy and second because he revealed that his inspiration has been the three colors trilogy of Kieslowski, pumping up expectations (at least with me).

The trilogy consists of the films "Sex", "Love" and "Dreams", all released in 2024.

"Sex" was the first film I saw. It is about two heterosexual men (two collegues as they are both chimney sweepers) whose masculinity is put into question by a recent event. One has had a "one day stand" with a male customer and the other has recurring dreams about David Bowie flirting with him as with a female.

Most of the film consists of dialogue in which the two men discuss their experiences with each other and with their spouses.

Remarkable is that the men themselves have less problems with what could be interpreted as an inroad on their masculinity than at least one of the spouses.

The film depends very much on dialogue and much of this dialogue is of a heavy psychological nature. Maybe not a surprise by a director who is also a novelist.

Although it speaks for the film that it has the courage to row against the current anti woke "zeitgeist", the heavy dialogue made the film very slow in my opinion. It never really gets into gear.

This is also illustrated by the fact that scenes outside the real theme were for me the highlights of the film.

Regularly the film shows images of Oslo, as a sort of Ozu like in between shots. I found these images very beautiful. Beautiful also was the image of the two chimney sweepers having a discussion on the roof of a building. This image was rightly selected for the poster.

Secondly a son of one of the men was in my opinion a very comical relief. Especially the discussions he has with his father about starting a you tube channel and with a doctor about the mestruation pain of one of his class mates.

All in all a film in which the best moments have nothing to do with the real theme can't be real good. Nevertheless I still plan to watch the entire trilogy. After all "Sex" is the lowest rated film of the three.

The plot of Sex (2024) centers on two middle-aged men who work as chimney sweepers. The film primarily focuses on their conversations with each other and their wives. One of the men confesses that he had sex with another guy while working for a client, while the other has recurring dreams of David Bowie looking at him as if he were a woman. Despite these experiences, both men see themselves as straight. The story delves into how the first man found the experience pleasant and raises the question of whether having meaningless sex with another man counts as cheating. This leads to long discussions with his wife. Meanwhile, the second man becomes fixated on whether his voice has changed, wondering if it has become more feminine.

This is essentially the entire two-hour film, which lacks a clear ending or resolution.

The acting was decent, and while the conversations were never boring, they tended to go in circles a bit too much.

As someone within the LGBTQ+ community this was a really frustrating watch.

At the start it was a bit sweet, endearing really. Two older men who's maybe just starting to discover new things about themselves (yay!). Nothing wrong about that and I support.

Then as the film goes on it becomes quite clear that the focus is not at all on self-discovery and growth as a person. Maybe the film tries to make it feel like it but no. They end up going in circles, discussing identity and emotions with people who either doesn't support how they feel or focused on the wrong thing.

I just wanted to scream at them to stop listening to their idiot partners and other people in their lives and just go talk to someone who knows! Now we just had people with 0 experience with being queer (or different) trying to confide in people with 0 experience as well. Just making up baseless theories and ending with the annoying conclusions. Never truly understanding and leaving the MCs feeling bad because of it.

If this was the point of the film, to just be frustrating and toxic, amazing you managed to do it. The dialogue is on point and quite entertaining. But do I feel like they did a good representation of queer people and show a healthy way to handle your emotions? No. Not at all.

If they would have at least added something to show how it goes very bad in the long run and how unhealthy it is, I would have loved it. But now it's stuck in a gray zone of nothing being solved properly and the characters deem it manageable so they ignore it and move on. The film makes it feel like this is an okay conclusion. I don't think that's okay! That's toxic.

Please, go talk to professionals. And please don't be scared to explore your sexual- or gender identity just because the people around you don't understand it.

With love from someone queer <3.

This Norwegian drama offers an intimate portrait of 2 middle aged chimney sweeps grappling with questions of identity, gender and sexuality.

One, despite being married has decides on a whim to have casual sex with a man, and the other struggles with self identity after dreaming about David Bowie looking at him like he is a woman

The thing that makes this film completely unique is the characterisation and tone. Every conversation, whether between the protagonists and their wives, doctors, or children, unfolds with complete frankness and openness without ego or shame, instead each person offering their own perspectives while genuinely attempting to understand each other and work through their emotions and disagreements. Its honestly refreshing and an almost utopian view of what humanity and human relationships could be

I cannot say I have ever seen a film before that shows meaningful character development without relying on melodrama or external conflict and the film explores themes like self identity, relationships, trust, masculinity so thoughtfully I was thinking about it for days, exactly the kind of thing I go to film festivals for.