- Sophie: [fake] Are you more concerned with the experiences that me and your Ethan shared or are you more concerned with what I know about the experiences that you and my Ethan shared?
- Ethan: [fake] Basically, first he betrayed you by sleeping with someone else and, and then he kind of betrayed you by sleeping with you.
- Ethan: Well, I'm not an aardvark.
- Ethan: [fake] And *I* am not a gorilla.
- [Ethan and Sophie sneak into a swimming pool]
- Sophie: Do you think he's coming out?
- Ethan: I'm sure. I'm sure. He heard us, right?
- [Calling for house owner]
- Ethan: Hello?
- [to Sophie]
- Ethan: This is fun. Where is he?
- Sophie: Maybe he's not home.
- Ethan: Happy anniversary anyway.
- [first lines]
- Ethan: [retelling] So, we met at a party, and... it was magic. Within a half-hour we were driving up into this really nice neighborhood, and we were running down the stairs of some strangers back yard, and then we were swimming, and we were in love. What we didn't count on was that even though the lights were off, the owner of the home was there. And he came out screaming at us, and it was the greatest night of my life.
- Ethan: Ready?
- Ethan, Sophie: [they run and jump into the pool]
- Ethan: [continuing his story] So me idea was, you know, let's try and re-create that moment.
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