Tell Them You Love Me

It's important to remember that as caregivers to a severely disabled person, the government subsidies are maximized. Therefore reallly, there are no incentives for the family to seek out further beneficial aides, educational assistance or anything else that will help D. J. to use or try to various ways to communicate because it will just rock the boat. They've been given all they need in terms of functional assessment, which is D. J.'s life sentence of severe disability and intelligence of a toddler, so they feel no guilt in not trying to help him.

The other thing, it's pretty clear that Anna was in a position of power and trust and made a bad choice, a series of bad choices. And deserved to be held to account. However, I don't doubt her feelings and that D. J. shared them, and that their intimacy was consensual.

Further, it's a very difficult film but it's important. It sparks thoughtful consideration of many aspects at the intersection of race, disability and sexual consent. I do hope we all open our hearts and minds to the hidden lessons and wish all parties involved many blessings.

This documentary really threw me for a loop. I went into it expecting a classic cut-and-dry true crime doc, but it ended up leaving me with an empty feeling in my throat. This, because either way the cookie crumbles, someone is suffering.

It began with a great story of a man and a woman working on the man's ability to communicate, and overturned into something completely different.

I really loved the way this was filmed, and how it really gives you, the viewer, a chance to see where you fall in the (unfortunate) black and white world of disability. I hope it generates more awareness of the polarizing effect so many people with disabilities face.

Why did the judge not ask Derrick to answer questions with the help of the keyboard after passing the simple IQ-test where Derrick is shown an apple and the keyboard assistant/facilitator is shown a spoon? If the answer would have been "apple" then the real questioning could proceed. If the answer would be "spoon" then we know the facilitator talks. Alternatively, the assistant/facilitator should not have been shown a picture of apple/spoon at all. It's Derrick that needed to answer in court, right? It looks like Anna was talking to herself through her patient Derrick. By letting Derrick move away from his home to a new home (with Anna) the gov subsidies would have moved too. Anna gets out of an unhappy marriage and becomes a heroine that made an intellectual out of a non-verbal man that was over-protected / locked away by his mom and bro for way too long. It's so simple : let Derrick prove in court that he really wrote those essays etc? Most probably the judge and jury saw that Derrick really wasn't and will never be capable. That's how Anna ended up in jail.

At the beginning I was like "oh, how amazing! The possibilities are great and his life has changed". But little by little you start to see that things are not okay and that every achievement raises questions.

The way that the woman believes blindly that their relationship was normal and all was fine is just horrendous. She can't think critically and therefore thinks everyone is wrong. The way that the communication works and how his intelligence develops extremally fast is very unlikely. When the assistance starts he barely communicates, but soon he starts to read papers and give political opinions?

The documentary shows how science and study are important to prevent misinformation and charlatans to take advantage on others.

That movie scream racism and control... but a lot of it from personal experience. Both disability and having some interracial relationships in the past.

From the start you could see the family was going to be the issue. Example, mother seriously needs to cut the apron strings, she's just keeping Derrick tied down and isolated because she doesn't want to be alone. Her husband left her due time him. Like they said and she don't want the child she choose over husband to leave. She acts just like my dude mom has acted and has said the same things. She even guilt trips him whenever he tries to stand up to her. Brings up the time he was in the hospital for 5 months in a coma and having seizures, that she was there everyday and no one else.

The brother is super raciest as well. Saying Derrick doesn't like our gospel music, because of Anna. That he never cried like that in front is a white woman. Why does it matter if she's whites. Why not just say, I never cried like that in front of a woman in a professional setting? Everything was about black and white with him.

As far as, Anna I'm conflicted. It's hard to know exactly Derrick's mindset, but I do believe he's a grown man. Even if they act like his mentality is of that of a 12 month old. I do find it odd she knew so much about him and his life for her manipulating his hand and thoughts. Specially after Anna stopped coming around, he was showing signs of distress and self harm.

However, common sense like never bring up your sex life with anyone outside your lover and friend zone... never parents or in-laws. That's why I feel if she really was raping him she wouldn't bring it up.

I agree and believe people with special needs don't have low intelligence and that we can all learn to communicate. My son whose autistic show's me this everyday. He might not be verbal, but we find ways around to communicate. Be it pictures or sign language, that way he's not getting frustrated as easily and so he knows that he's not being isolated and not heard; and so he knows he has a voice.