Linda Lovelace for President

Linda Lovelace for President (1975)

* 1/2 (out of 4)

The title pretty much tells you everything you need to know plot wise. The country is falling apart so a group of people decide only Linda Lovelace can save us so they contact her and begin a Presidential run.

After the success of DEEP THROAT, star Lovelace became a household name and people were looking for any way to try and cash in. LINDA LOVELACE FOR PRESIDENT was an attempt to try and push Lovelace into a R-rated picture with a wider appeal but obviously that didn't happen and the actress began her slow fall from grace. As awful as this film is, I must admit that I give the producers a lot of credit because I'd give everyone involved with this production an A+ for effort.

With that said, effort isn't enough when it comes to entertainment. I think the best way to sum up this film is by thinking of the final mad-cap sequence in BLAZING SADDLES. That's basically the type of over-the-top humor that is on display here but the only problem is that there's no one as talented as Mel Brooks or Gene Wilder to make this film work. There's a lot of sexual innuendo, a lot of female nudity and a lot of politically incorrect humor. The film tries pumping out one joke after another but the problem is that none of it is funny.

I will give Lovelace some credit though as she certainly manages to hold your attention throughout all the camp. She's certainly easy on the eyes but she also brings across a certain charm and a beautiful smile that really lights up the screen even without any hardcore sex. She certainly gives it her all and is the highlight of the picture.

What a dumb movie! There are lots of character actors you'll recognize in it. Watch for the dirty old man and see if you recognize him. One even changed his name so he wouldn't be associated with it. Lots of worn out puns over and over and over. It might be funny in states where pot is legal. But like I said, there are only two good reasons to watch this movie.

Linda Lovelace is definitely the best thing about this movie, and the only possible reason for watching it. This takes into account the fact that Linda was an "adult movie" star, and not an actress. Linda was a genuinely nice looking woman. She would not have needed to remove her clothes, in order to catch someone's eye. Of course, I had no problem with Linda removing her clothes. But, she had my attention while she was still dressed. The story of an adult movie star becoming the first female president is pretty silly. The movie is exceedingly stupid. All kinds of (completely unneeded) racial stereotypes. There are many fine character actors here, all of whom were capable of much better than what they did in this movie. The movie has too much dialogue, which is completely unfunny. Again, Linda is the only reason to watch. She absolutely made an impression on me. She looked good without her clothes, but she also looked good with her clothes on. She could have been something better than an "adult movie" star.

Infamous porn star Linda Lovelace is best known for her amazing control of her gag reflex, not for performing gags, and so fans will be relieved to hear that any woeful attempts at comedy by the Deep Throat legend are more than offset by frequent full frontal nudity from the lovely lady and her enthusiastic participation in soft core sex. Still, Linda's crap comedic skills are no worse than anyone else's in this horribly dated madcap political satire: it's an all-round embarrassment of massive proportions.

Linda Lovelace plays herself, once again catapulted into the limelight when she is nominated as a presidential candidate by an eclectic group of oddball characters. What follows is a dreadfully unfunny, often perplexing series of zany scenes that were surely fuelled by copious amounts of mind-altering substances. Certainly, in order to enjoy this abysmal relic of the mid-70s, one would need to be seriously baked. The chaotic opening scene, in which a committee discusses various candidates before settling on Linda, must rate as one of the biggest tests of a viewer's patience in movie history, seemingly shot without the aid of a script or the need for a director.

With the introduction of an assassin, hired to get rid of Linda when she leads the polls, the film descends into sub-roadrunner cartoon slapstick, each gag more painful than the last. The title of worst performance must go to ex-Monkee Micky Dolenz, whose career almost audibly hits rock bottom (Metal Mickey is a work of genius by comparison), although the competition is hot. Best performance is from a talking chimp (oh, how I wish I was joking).

There's a disclaimer at the outset of this movie warning that the content is guaranteed to offend just about everyone. Here in the 21st century, one should heed that warning. There are all kinds of offensive racial and sexual stereotypes that would have naturally raised hackles in 1975, let alone in the present. The movie is about the campaign (fictional) of Linda Lovelace, known mostly for starring in the seminal '70s porn movie Deep Throat, for president of the United States. Lovelace is nominated by a group of six walking caricatures (representing millions of people each), including a really butch lesbian, a really effeminate man, an actual neo-Nazi, a token black, a Chinese man (not played by an Asian, of course), and a Catholic priest. After being convinced by her (literal) Uncle Sam to run for president, Lovelace embarks upon a nationwide tour, giving speeches and hopping into bed with as many helpful young men as possible. Now, in case you're still uncertain about this movie's virtues, there is definitely no reason anyone under 18 should be allowed within 100 yards of the film. There's nudity and sex, although there isn't much violence. But, seriously - she's a porn star playing herself, so there's naturally some softcore scenes thrown in to get the attention of male viewers. If the rampant sex doesn't put you off, then maybe the over-the-top characterizations will. Among the cast are Mickey Dolenz as a near-sighted bus driver, Art Metrano (Police Academy) as a sheikh, Scatman Crothers as a pool hustler named Super Black (!), Kennedy impersonator Vaughn Meader as a lusty preacher, and Joe E. Ross (Car 54, Where Are You?) as a dirty trickster in politics. Like some other movies of the late 60s and early 70s, the major theme here is of chaotic wackiness. As the lead, Lovelace is fine playing herself. There's not much plot, there's a ton of offensive material, and nudity abounds. But if you see it in the right frame of mind, perhaps viewing it as an artifact of its times, this isn't a terrible film. (For a fun bonus, check out all of the protest signs near the beginning of the movie. Pure genius putting the AA people next to the AAA people.)