Bad

"Andy Warhol's Bad" is probably one of my top ten favorite comedies. Imagine a John Waters movie and make it ten times more offensive! Great stuff! This is quite a turn from director Paul Morrissey's underground improvisation opuses, but isn't a bad change.

Carroll Baker is great as Hazel Aiken, a lady who runs an electrolysis clinic in her home and a murder-for-hire business on the side, utilizing only female killers (save for new employee Perry King). Baker is fabulous and reminded me of Kathleen Turner in "Serial Mom", just without the constant happiness. Susan Tyrell is great as Hazel's daughter-in-law Mary, who spends her life residing in Hazel's house caring for her baby. Always looking frumpy and whiny, Tyrell is hilarious! I see now why John Waters seeked her out for a part in "Cry-Baby"! Perry King is a painfully obvious Joe Dallesandro replacement. Reportedly Dallesandro turned down the part for work in Europe, which unfortunately didn't lead to anything that helped his career. He would have been perfect here and would have acted with/had another sex scene with one-time girlfriend Stefania Casini (they had worked together in "Blood for Dracula"). Casini's Italian accent is thankfully left intact and is very sexy as a redheaded assassin. Also making an appearance is early Warhol regular Brigid Polk as Estelle, a bitchy fat lady who wants cop Lawrence Tierney's dog killed for something he said about her weight! Jane Forth is almost unrecognizable as a screaming passerby who is splattered with blood when a woman throws her baby out the window! As you can tell from these examples, "Andy Warhol's Bad" is not for everyone. For those with a very broad taste in humor and those not easily offended.

The measuring stick of dark comedy. Subtle, yet outrageous. A despicable work of art. This is Andy Warhol's Bad. Meet Hazel, Hazel appears to be a regular house wife. She runs a beauty salon out of her house, she also lets her sick mother, and morbidly depressed, freshly dumped, daughter-in-law, live with her. Hazel also let's young ladies who need a place to live, stay there too, for a little extra money. The thing is, they're all going through Hazel, acquiring jobs as hit women, to do anything from vandalizing buildings to murdering unwanted infants. You see, Hazel really likes money. One of Hazel's young ladies has a friend named L.T. (not played by Joe Dallesandro), L.T. is broke and needs a "job". Hazel doesn't usually hire guys, but what the hell. So she lets L.T. stay for a few days, to wait for the job to come through, although there will be plenty of rent money due. L.T. is a lazy smart-ass, and Hazel's non-existent patience quickly runs thin with this mooch. Meanwhile, we the viewer are subject to one offensive, gruesome, and often humorous crime after the other. Bad also includes hot women like Carroll Baker, and Stefania Casini, hilarious dialogue, and were even given the pleasure of a couple cameo's by Adam Sorg from Color me Blood Red, as Hazel's insignificant, discouraged-looking husband. There isn't one character in Bad that isn't either evil, or miserable. Even the cop has bad intentions. Everything in this movie revolves around either money, revenge, or simply causing someone misery because it's funny. The Highlights of Bad include a very dry-humored, mean-spirited, Hazel, and her lonely, whipped puppy-dog of a daughter-in-law, and let's not forget the spiteful racist, Estelle, an outlandish hog of a woman, just looking for a fight. Calling Bad politically incorrect would just be silly at this point. Bad is the first, as well as the last Warhol Film that wasn't directed by Paul Morrissey. Thus film has a different feel all together, Bad doesn't have that improvised charm of a Morrissey/Warhol, but is more determined to shock than ever. If you've never seen a Warhol, it's probably best to start with this one, then Trash, if you like that one, Flesh for Frankenstein and Blood for Dracula will definitely impress. They say Bad has something to offend everyone, a lot of us have seen more offensive than this, but as far as dark comedies and cult films in general go, Bad is among the elite. As far as I'm concerned, they should have called this movie Andy Warhol's Awesome. 9/10

If you're not sure what irony is, imagine a housewife in Queens running a legitimate electrolysis shop while also running an illegitimate "murder for hire" operation. But Hazel Aiken's real pet peeves are using off color references (toilet talk) in her kitchen or after deliberately scattering broken glass, sets up her male boarder to walk barefoot through it, threatening him if he gets blood droplets on her rug. Orchestrating the murders of auto mechanics, babies and dogs is just part of a days work. Carroll Baker is perfect is the self-absorbed Hazel Aiken who prefers using women to carry out these dastardly deeds. It is only after she breaks from tradition and hires L.T (Perry King) as her newest recruit, do things go astray. Every job is bungled. Hazel's homely, depressed and poor daughter-in-law (Susan Tyrrell) is the only soul with a conscience in this dark but funny flick. Of all the "underground" Wahhol movies, this would be considered closest to "ground level". It also stars Brigid Berlin (then Brigid Polk), Cyrinda Foxe, Mary Boylan, Stefania Casini, Charles McGregor and a list of lesser known "Warhol" affiliates. It's a "must see" for those who appreciate the offbeat.

"Andy Warhol's Bad" concerns a rapacious middle-age housewife in NYC who runs an electrolysis business and a murder-for-hire (with only female employees) business out of her home. There are various subplots, involving her hired assassins, their clients, and her mentally dull daughter-in-law who lives with her (and whom she cruelly exploits). Although often considered "camp", a la the films of John Waters, "Bad" is in reality more of a satire in the vein of "Gulliver's Travels". The critique is presents of contemporary, capitalist values in American society is right on target, so that the thoroughly unrealistic plot seems all too real. Even more, this film has perhaps the funniest, most original dialogue of any film ever made - you'll never forget the dangerously paranoid Brigid Polk (a.k.a., Brigid Berlin) and the two amoral sisters she hires to kill a dog. The acting, by both pros and Warhol superstars, is excellent. It even manages to successfully pull off the few moments of poignancy that are allowed in the bleak world it depicts (the assault on the dog and his owner, the final epiphany of L.T. when his empathy prevents him from killing an autistic child and his subsequent confrontation with Hazel). This is not a film for most people - it is far too pessimistic, brutal and graphic - but if you can stomach that, it is more than worth your while to see.

"Bad" was one of the most offensive, hilarious and brilliantly written films I saw in the 70's. Carroll Baker puts forth an incredibly bland, sarcastic performance as a housewife with a clan of hit women on the side (hey, a woman's gotta pay the bills). My only misgiving about the film was Perry King never made a very good Joe Dallesandro, and I got the feeling while I was watching it Warhol and Johnson were doing everything they could to replicate him. The saddest thing about this film is that after waiting for years for it to show up on DVD, it's finally been presented in such poor, dismal quality that it's almost not worth watching. Why would a company called CheezyFlicks release this, and release it in such poor shape? This needs a better release, as well as a remaster, so it can really be appreciated. What they've done to this classic film is a real shame.