Le couvent

Me, my sister, and our aunt rented this and 3 other movies...I wanted a horror movie and my aunt wanted something that was current (because she's seen probably all of the 70's horror flicks) so we rented The Convent.

I had a feeling that it'd be cheap and crappy and I was right.

The whole movie had us laughing so hard! I don't remember the last time I laughed that hard and for that long! Also, I noticed two references to other horrors movies in there--Halloween, when the nun walks up to the little girl in the graveyard she has on the Michael Myers mask. And when the nun walks up to the girl in the desk in that flashback scene she spews green stuff on her (The Exorcist.) This movie will have you in tears laughing! (Well it did for at least me, my sister, and my aunt!) I also think it was the director's intention to make it campy fun I dunno if he intended it to be an actual horror film.

Or maybe he did and knew that it'd turn out to be a crappy D horror flick so he went crazy with the budget and script! I found this extremely entertaining and gave it a 7!

Hell yeah! That's pretty much the feeling the average person will have throughout this compact and action-filled piece of garbage. It's an incredibly crazy, riveting and somewhat moronic 75 minutes, it's the kind of project that defines what B-list horror should be all about. The hilarious (in a sadistic way) opening immediately drags you in, and the movie just utterly refuses to let you go after that. Demonic zombie nuns, fluorescent(!) blood, hot chicks, washed-up gangsta rapper Coolio playing a cop, I thank God for showing me all this pure uncut greatness. If all this stuff can't get your attention, I really don't know what will. The Adrienne Barbeau appearance is just icing on the cake, brilliant role. Of course this movie isn't particularly well-made or well-written, but I stopped caring roughly ten seconds in. Loads of fun.

Usually I don't try and tell people NOT to see a movie. We all have different tastes, and someone might actually like a film I hate. I already saw a review title which gave this movie a good vibe. In my opinion they are WRONG. I just wouldn't feel right if I didn't warn you about how incredibly disappointed you'd be!!!!!!! Lousy special effects, a bad script, a crappy story line... and the fact that you can't even recognize David Gunn..... that just was too much to handle!!!!! The plotline could've worked if they just hadn't totally BLOWN it from the very beginning... seriously... I only rented it because David Gunn was in it, and he turned out to have such a bad role that it made me run into the bathroom and bow to the porcelain god. He was far better in "Vampire Journals". Then again, he was the hero in that movie. In this one he's a fasletto-ed nobody who thinks he's somebody! Seriously, stay away from this movie!

The Convent is a Underrated Comedy Horror Splatter. This Movie is fast paced and there is much gore and some really funny moments. The only issue that I have with this Movie it is too short ( without End credits only 69 Minutes ). This Movie deserves more credit especially in the Horror Community. The Main Actress and Adrienne Barbeau was solid too. Fully recommended

A group of dumb, sex straved teenagers break into an abandon convent and accidently raise demons that proceed to kill them. The only person they can turn to is Adrienne Barbeau. The only person to ever escape from the demons alive.

Boring, poorly done film is certainly different, but different isn't always good. Sloopy gore effects, editing that looks like it was done by a chainsaw, and some of the most annoying characters ever demolish whatever chances it had. Adrienne Barbeau livens things up when she finally arrives on screen and gives the film a touch of class, but alas it is too late and too little screen time for her.

Rated R; Graphic Violence, Adult Themes, Sexual Situations, Nudity, and Profanity.