A Cadaver Christmas

This is my review for a cadaver Christmas, can't remember when I bought the disc or what I paid for it. OK for a time filler I suppose but not worth more than four stars. Normally I give very good reviews, but unfortunately this film didn't cut the mustard. You win some you loose some, so jacey says peace out.

Forced to bring a group of disbelievers into a college dorm, a janitor leads the group through the halls filled with zombies reanimated through an on-campus experiment and must find a way of getting out safely.

This turned out to be quite an enjoyable and cheesy zombie effort. One of the biggest pluses here is the fact that there's a rather enjoyable atmosphere created from the goofy action presented. There's some rather enjoyable material to be found here as the plot allows this ample opportunities to get rather silly at times where the groups' bumbling nature in regards to both offensive and defensive tactics against the zombies gets rather silly at times, utilizing mops and brooms for offense, slipping and sliding on blood-soaked hallways and using everything from desks and notebooks to provide a barrier against the encroaching hordes and the over-the-top nature here keeps this one quite enjoyable. Combined along with the jokes and word-play present, this one has more laughs than expected though this one never forgets to have a hand in the scares which is what allows this one to keep the zombies as threats. They're the slow, shuffling variety which keeps the factor here based on the overall number of creatures there swarming around them as they fight them off, resulting not only in pretty enjoyable scenes but also plenty of action within as the group has plenty of time to fight them off. This also adds some pretty decent amounts of gore to the proceeds, and while these make for some rather entertaining measures, it does have a few flaws in that the comedic nature wears thin after a while with some of the jokes loosing their luster and the whole enterprise being loaded by a rather preposterous storyline that gets almost no fleshing out and remains ludicrous upon scrutiny. Otherwise, there's a whole lot to like here.

Rated R: Graphic Violence, Graphic Language, Brief Nudity and comedic sexual scenes.

There's a lot going on here. I get a sense that the finished film pretty well matches what the director, writers, and their cast were trying to achieve. Unfortunately, I can't say that the end product is fun, or sparks the imagination, in the way I assume those involved would want. 'A cadaver Christmas' is, sadly, mostly pretty subpar.

I do appreciate the post-production work that ensured the picture bears the appearance of a 70s grindhouse feature - faint vertical lines across the screen, slightly grainy image quality. In addition, there are a handful of moments scattered throughout these 85 minutes that are mildly clever and lightly amusing. However, these are the only noteworthy fragments of praise I have to offer.

It's one thing to suggest the cast demonstrate a lack of acting skills, thereby engendering inauthenticity in the movie, and I suppose that's a distinct possibility. True or not, it's also clear that everyone is emphatically hamming up their performances, and overacting - presumably at least in part in an effort to mimic those same grindhouse flicks. But with rare, infrequent exception as noted, their performances aren't funny, or even just broadly enjoyable. Mostly they're just overblown and irritating.

There are some good ideas in the plot, but the screenplay at large is less than impressive. Characters are very thin, and dialogue bears the same regrettable qualities as the acting. For one prominent example, town drunk Tom is supposed to be consistent comic relief, but for far too much of his time on screen he is instead just overbearing, and an unwelcome addition. Scene writing is loose, feels a little haphazard at times, and is often definitely unconvincing; even if the inclusion of an instance in the narrative is worthwhile, in the details it falters. Worse than the writing, though, is Joe Zerull's direction. Those questionable scenes are built with shots that attempt to imitate the artfulness and sophistication of other titles where they are employed, but here they are terribly forced and unnatural. Zerull's guidance of the cast, and the orchestration of each scene, feels amateurish and unpracticed. His work as editor is no better, with inelegant cuts and sequencing that leaves a bit to be desired.

I will allow that 'A cadaver Christmas' certainly feels like a low-budget passion project among friends, and I'm often willing to overlook many indelicacies so long as the end result is worthy. I've seen a few small-time pictures for which "DIY" and "homemade" were arguably the best descriptors, and was pleasantly surprised by how good they were. But what I see here, more than anything, is occasional passing value that in the next moment is taken too far, and is overcooked. That goes for special effects, as static blood and gore look great, but staged gory violence and post-production visual effects are dubious. That goes for much of the would-be comedy; when it isn't outright forced, a flash of amusement often overstays its welcome, diminishing its benefit. And that goes even for the ending, which could have concluded with a spark of brilliance before sunrise, but instead come morning is taken an extra step that breaks with the sardonic tone the feature has otherwise struck. Almost every scene that should be funny, horrific, or even poignant is rendered inert by the substantial indelicate hand at play in writing, direction, and acting alike.

I admire what the participants here were trying to do - creating a holiday horror flick with few resources and no major backing. Effort only goes so far, though, especially if the outcome falls too short. I want to like this more than I do - I see the potential of what the concept could have been - yet I also wonder if I'm already being too generous. I think budgetary constraints were the least of the problems with 'A cadaver Christmas,' as more so than not it tends to try too hard, or manages a proverbial "swing and a miss" while facing the wrong direction. True, there are a lot worse films out there that one could accidentally start watching. But unless you're dead-set on watching flicks of a group to which this belongs in one capacity or another, there's no need to seek it out, and I can't say I'd specifically recommend it for anything.

How unfortunate.

As a zombie aficionado, it was somewhat of a treat to sit down and watch "A Cadaver Christmas" actually. I had never heard about it anywhere when I came upon it by sheer random luck. And as it was something with zombies, it caught my interest and I decided to give it a go.

So what is "A Cadaver Christmas" you might think? Well, think "Dead Alive", "Feast" and "Shaun of the Dead" mixed up into one movie, then you basically have "A Cadaver Christmas". It was a great movie to watch, good amount of blood and mayhem, good story and nice characters. However, the movie slacked somewhat on the acting part, as it wasn't the best of performances to be seen in this movie. But for a low budget movie, they pulled it off as to be expected.

The story was simple and straight forward as most zombie movie story lines tend to be. A group of people get stuck somewhere with zombies and have to survive. And of course, the survivors are underdogs of society, as they tend to be in these types of movies, so nothing new here.

Actually the characters were the best part of the movie. You had a drunk (played by Hanlon Smith-Dorsey), a bartender (played by Ben Hopkins), a former police officer (played by Yosh Hayashi), a perp (played by Edward O'Ryan) and a janitor (played by Daniel Rairdin-Hale). These characters were extreme in their own ways, but it worked out well enough, because they all added flavor to the movie.

For a low budget zombie movie, then "A Cadaver Christmas" is actually at the high end of the scale, because the story was enjoyable (despite the often questionable acting), and the characters were fun and likable. Plus, and most importantly, there was a good amount of blood and gore in the movie to keep most gore hounds satisfied.

If you enjoy zombie movies and don't mind watching even those that don't have a multi million dollar budget, then you should check out "A Cadaver Christmas".

There was way too little humor and what looked like an attempt at dramatic moments. Make it funny, make it a horror movie, put on some horse blinders, and go for it. This is barely an entertaining b-horror movie.