Poolman

By day, Darren Barrenman (Chris Pine) is a pool man. With his circle of friends, he is constantly presenting miniscule issues to the city council and filming his never-finished documentary. He is the thorn in the side of council president Stephen Toronkowski (Stephen Tobolowsky). Out of the blue, the mysterious June (DeWanda Wise) recruits him to take down Toronkowski for unknown corruption. Susan Kerkovich (Jennifer Jason Leigh) is his girlfriend. Jack Denisoff (Danny DeVito) is his documentary director. Diane Esplinade (Annette Bening) is his therapist. Wayne (John Ortiz) is his minion.

The story may be riffing off of Chinatown, but the movie is very much looking to imitate The Big Lebowski. Chris Pine is writing and directing. As the lead actor, he is very much doing the Dude. I like his attempt. He's not holding back. He has surrounded himself with plenty of great actors. The problem boils down to the script and filmmaking. In those respects, Pine is no Coen brothers. It's not there in the details and I want changes to the last act.

Everything, and I mean everything about this movie is egregiously bad. An offensive waste of time and talent.

What it is a forensic examination of pool maintenance filmed in the style of Chinatown.....I am not kidding.

I dare anyone to not feel bored by this after half an hour and I double dare them to watch to the end.

Yes Chris, of course you can make a movie with Danny DeVito and Annette Benning and a bunch of your other friends. And, of course you can write it and direct it having done neither of those things before.

The writing, direction, plot, cinematography, acting and editing seek only to confuse and annoy in equal measure.

This may be the worst movie ever made. And I'm still not kidding.

Desperately screaming 'I love and understand Los Angeles', dire stylized dramedy "Poolman" tries laying a veneer of "The Big Lebowski" (without its natural charm) over a twisty plot based on "Chinatown" (that it homages). Titular pool-cleaner Chris Pine (a retro hippie with OCD - sigh) is on a social activism drive (supported by Annette Bening, Danny DeVito, Jennifer Jason Leigh, DeWanda Wise & John Ortiz) against city councillor Stephen Tobolowsky... which pulls him into that shady convoluted plot which also involves the likes of Clancy Brown & Ray Wise. Pine's a fine actor, but his debut as director / co-writer (with fellow debutant Ian Gotler) sucks. Drain it away.

I understand why people are panning this film. It's extremely off the beaten path. Hollywood does replication and repetitiveness very well. There are so few new ideas. That's why we see endless remakes of comic films and outer space franchises. How man Bond films are there? By the way, this is nothing new. The earliest films in America were inspired, in part or in whole, by other, earlier works.

As film viewers, we've become accustomed to this paradigm. So much so, as evidenced in other user reviews, when we don't get it, we get upset. "Poolman" is an odd film. I don't think anyone would dispute that. But it's odd on purpose. Pine was clearly sending up old tropes, like the ones the Sam Spade films, and "Chinatown". This film is not typical Hollywood fodder. I enjoyed the breath of fresh air and a tongue firmly planted in cheek. :-D.

I'm not sure who this movie is for. The premise is kind of Noir film + Big Lebowski, and the main character is surely peculiar, as are his friends, but unlike the cult classic, nothing they say feels funny nor special; it's like being stuck in a room with strangers who are not very bright, who have smoked something, and are trying to make a conversation. It's tiring. It doesn't help that everything feels very slow and sleepy, and the plot is so obvious that even a child would figure it out, while eyes rolling. Maybe that was the point, to play with Noir genre expectations. But every film, regardless of genre, should have some element of surprise, meaning, and depth; otherwise, what's the point of making the film and what's the point of watching? I can't see those here. Maybe it's about boredom.