How to Kill Monsters

The costumes are freakishly bad, the acting weak, the plot a watered down rehash, but there's enough good jokes in the same vein of Sean of the Dead to be worth watching this movie.

If the movie had abandoned efforts to be a horror movie and just stuck with the comedy this would have been a great movie actually. It's when it pretends to be serious that you start to yawn and thinking the parts worth watching are over then comes another batch of laughs, but only enough to keep you going to the end.

So it's well worth watching, especially if you liked Shaun of the dead. As a horror movie keep on going. This is a T as in trash it not even worthy of being a B or C flick in terms of horror.

On Halloween, at a cabin in the woods, there is a party going on, and the star attraction is an ancient relic, the Eldritch Blade. By aligning a series of coded symbols, it is activated, and let's say, one really doesn't want to activate it. It summons monsters, among other nasty stuff. It is low budget, and the monsters are done practical, more or less as they would have been done in B movies of the 1960's. Men in rubber suits with tentacles and gaping mouths. The CGI is less than what could be done in a middle school film class. Anyway, out from the cabin comes Jamie with a chainsaw. Everyone else in the cabin is dead, and she is the main suspect. She tries to tell them what happened but the police don't believe her. There are dumb people, some slapstick, but for the most part rampant silliness. Not great, but silly fun.

Watched at the film premier at FrightFest 2023 and the film was brilliant, plenty of comedy and horror with more than a splash of blood and guts. ;-)

The is mainly based in the Police station where they think Jamie has killed a load of people in a cabin in the woods.

She is then put into the cells with an assortment of characters, mainly a hen party who are always taking the micky of the officers.

From that point, it is where things get a little freaky and the monsters start appearing and the blood and guts starts flowing.

Some brilliant old school special FX throughout the film.

A brilliant cast too ;-)

Director Stewart Sparkle's 2023 feature film is a kind of follow up to his earlier film 'Book of Monsters'. On Halloween Jamie (Lyndsey Crane) is found in a cabin in the woods with a chainsaw, covered in blood, and with her friends chopped up all around her. Taken to a police station for questioning she claims it was a monster from the beyond wot done it. But then - with police laughter still ringing in her ears - strange things start happening. Written by Sparkle with Paul Butler this is a gore filled supernatural monster horror comedy, which fortunately doesn't take itself too seriously. Hokum, with some rather annoying cops - one of them played by Johnny Vivash (him again!).

After surviving the original massacre, the last woman left is taken into custody by the police and kept with the rest of the inmates at a jail cell until they can figure out what's going on, but when they inadvertently summon a swarm of demonic creatures force her to save everyone again.

This was a fairly fun and enjoyable genre follow-up. Among the better elements with this one comes from the strong opening setup present within here that provides this one with the kind of intriguing connection of preexisting storylines, while also letting it work as a standalone genre effort. Tying into the previous events by showing the actual aftermath of the events and rolling credits in a meta-way makes the connections clear pretty early on about its sequel status, much like the flashback detailing what went wrong in the cabin that resulted in the actual start of the film proper when she gets picked up. The disbelieving staff at the police station who go through her belongings and try to paint her a the culprit for everything despite her insistence on the monsters responsible for everything makes for a fine touch to carry the storyline on, and with this giving a great opportunity to look into the various other incarcerated members of the station coming along for the ride, there's a lot to like here. That leaves the film with a great setup for the strong slew of impressive creature attacks throughout here. With this going for a constantly-changing selection of creatures that continually show up as obstacles to prevent the crew from finding the tool that stopped them the last time, this provides the film with the ability to work as a more action-oriented siege effort focused on clearing the monsters as they encounter the next hurdle in their quest. From the first confrontation in the jail cells giving everyone a sense of what they're up against, the fight to get upstairs to the remaining troops left in the station where they find the creatures have started sealing them off from the rest of the world, or the later scenes in the station where the race to uncover the one sacred object that can stop them brings about a series of different creations on everyone offering a great mix of practical creature effects for the uniquely-designed beings they come across and practical gore. These manage to make for a lot to like here, while there are a few issues that hold this one down. The main issue here is the somewhat underwhelming and unneeded change of pace the third act takes, which is a different entity entirely from what had been previously featured. Rather than focus on a more Action-oriented Horror setup with the way they constantly face off against different creatures standing in their way, the film opts for a series of over-the-top arcane spells and wizardry that tries to paint the use of those powers which are nicely hinted at earlier but just feels out of place in this kind of setup. It still keeps the rest of the gore and practical effects here but there's a different type of tone and atmosphere that stands out compared to the rest of the film, and manages to accomplish the other main issue in dragging the film out longer than it should trying to bring about a series of different revelations and storylines that this brings up. It's all a part of what makes the ending a bit underwhelming, and with the somewhat obvious low-budget limitations featured here, is what holds it down.

Rated Unrated/R: Graphic Violence and Graphic Language.