The Beauty Pageant

This is a throwback porn feature, that if it was a fish would have been thrown back into the pond. Amateurism on parade.

It reminded me of so many softcore 1960s flicks, an unprofessional showcase for various beauties, mostly sporting thick bushes and with a couple of beautiful ringers like Nancy Suiter and Nancy Hoffman. The male cast is strictly beasts, giving the movie a pro-am feel overall.

Ridiculous story has a unappealing guy (obscuro Martin Long) reminiscing in flashback about his gig as a photographer for a waterbed company's promotional campaign built around a Miss Sleepwalk beauty pageant. Sleeping with the judges is mandatory here.

The all-time great Kelly Stewart has a cameo role, and phony names are applied to most of the cast. This very minor release should have stayed hidden in a landfill.