Boa

This movie is non-stop B quality action. One of the least likely plots in the world, some of the most unrealistic special effects ever and a script that probably doesn't exist, I think the director realized the caliber of acting talent he had at his disposal and let them adlib the lot. Best bits are when the security guard acts like he has had no gun training as he fires his shotgun aimlessly (good pun). Also when dean cains missus runs off and he shouts her name about 7 times in a row. JESSICA, JESSICA JESSICA. I do love this film, but only cos its really bad. Dean Cain to play bond!!!!! Oh and the ending is ridiculous!!!!! Cold blooded snake that isn't bothered it's in antarctic conditions!!!!! Likely.

Anybody who sees this film expecting the second coming of Citizen Kane is fooling themselves. Folks, it's just a movie meant to entertain us. And in that sense, I think it did a fine job. Sure there were holes in the plot and some mediocre CG effects, but overall it didn't do too badly in my book. My main gripes were in the opening scene. So if I'm flying a giant cargo plane and it starts making funny noises, I'm certainly not going to open up the crates. And that CG snake is pretty badly done. Why a snake? A monkey would have been more convincing, and most importantly, monkeys make us laugh! I was impressed with the set design though. Very effective use of set design to give us the sense of claustrophobia. The main control room was quite a contrast to the rest of the cold blocky hallways. Overall, not a bad job, especially from the typical giant snake movie. Faced between Anaconda or Boa at the video stores, I'd take Boa in a heartbeat.

Somewhere on the frozen ground of Antarctica a high-level security prison is being built which will eventually contain the worst criminals in the world. Unfortunately, because the construction is behind schedule the warden, "Fred Riley" (Craig Wasson) orders his engineers to drill into a hollow rock formation before necessary tests can be made to ensure the safety of the procedure. Sure enough, a gas pocket is hit which causes an explosion that results in some damage to the facility. What they don't realize is that the real problem is yet to be faced because the hole created by the explosion has released a giant boa constrictor which is extremely hungry from his million-year hibernation-and the only available food source is the people within the prison. Now rather than reveal any more of this movie I will just say that it had a pretty good premise to build upon. Regrettably, this film lacked anything substantive. The suspense was weak, the acting was uneven and the plot was much too simplistic. I especially thought the casting of a female IRA terrorist named "Patricia O'Boyle" (played by Amandah Reyne) was totally laughable and practically ruined the entire film all by itself. In short, this movie had potential but the director (Phillip J. Roth) failed to capitalize on it. I have rated it accordingly. Below average.

The movie is best described as any typical poorly produced horror type movie where the characters will do the stupidest things to get themselves killed for no reason (eg.-walking into places knowing that you'll be killed or not taking anyones obvious warnings). The acting itself was not bad but the movie doesn't make much sense as to how a giant snake can move around the prison but can't really be seen until at least the last 45 minutes of the film. Some scenes were just written poorly. for example, dean cain promises a prisoner her safety when she was freaking out about the snake eating her and 5 minutes later, all he did was shoot her (but not the snake) so she wouldn't have to deal with the pain of being eaten... I guess that's still keeping his word. I'm no animal expert but this snake goes around this prison eating a bunch of people...don't snakes eat and then go hide and sleep it off since they're most vulnerable when they are full?? I don't think it's even worth the time watching this film. if dean cain would show some skin, perhaps it's still worth the rental.

The bad big snake movie redux

First off, people who throw around the epithet "worst movie of all time" haven't seen enough bad movies. Go watch Turbulence 1, 2 or 3, or Druids to know what the phrase really means. This movie is bad, but it's fun bad. It's heckle-able (is that a word? it is now). There's plenty to make fun of but it's hardly unwatchable. If you go in (as I did) knowing that this is going to be a bad big snake movie (or a bad CGI-thing movie) then you can enjoy it on it's own terms for 90 minutes. Granted, they are stupid terms, but hey, why else would you rent a straight-to-video movie starring Dean Cain & a CGI snake?