Postal

Disclaimer: Let me start by saying that I was neither drunk nor high when I watched this movie. I watched it stone cold sober, alone, in my living room.

Amazingly I just gave an Uwe Boll film 8 stars, I know, I can't believe it myself. If I were twelve years old and still read MAD Magazine I'd probably have given it ten stars.

There are plenty of "zany" pop culture riffing movies out there, (Meet the Spartans, Super Hero Movie, Date Movie, etc.) but the difference here is Postal works. I laughed throughout the entire movie, with the exception of about seven jokes which didn't make sense or just didn't work. But it doesn't matter that these seven jokes failed because the movie is an endless stream of jokes, sight gags, bikini clad cult members, machine gun battles, and bad taste in the vein of John Waters/Troma Films earliest efforts.

It's too bad Uwe Boll got himself involved in a petty internet pi**ing contest over this film. I think had he just been modest, kept his mouth shut, and let the film speak for itself it may have been a minor success. The old Hollywood saying about there being "no such thing as bad publicity" doesn't work for you when all you get is BAD PUBLICITY.

That said, the only real problems with the film are the low budget production values and a few of the minor performances, but even those problems just add to the humor of this film.

The plot actually made sense.

The actors played it straight without being too zany too often.

And the jokes, although in bad taste and definitely not for everybody, were never so mean spirited that I was turned off by them.

I think Uwe Boll knew what he was doing with this picture. The satire and parodies worked well, and there were even a few jokes that made me want to cheer. I know, crazy huh?

Uwe Boll's best Movie. Better than "You Don't Mess with the Zohan". Neither of those statements are saying particularly much, but to say the least, this movie is actually worth watching. Postal is essentially an absurdist farce comprised of characters designed to be caricatures of the worst parts of humanity. Assuming this was not some cosmic coincidence whereby Uwe Boll managed to write and direct a movie that actually entertains it's alleged target audience, I feel confident in saying that this movie actually hits it's mark. Knowing the spirit and tone of the source material, this is actually a pretty decent video game adaptation. The movie is essentially a Bollian journey into Tromaville territory: from the crass socio-political commentary, through the excessive violence, coarse language, gratuitous full frontal Dave Foley nudity, right down to the self deprecating director cameo. It's intentionally offensive to everyone. Despite itself, on some level this movie works. It's weird that I seem to only have good things to say about this movie, seeing as it is not a good movie... but, dare I say, it's not bad either. 5/10

After all the crap Uwe Boll made, I really had very low expectations for this one. And those were not just met, but exceeded. The guy actually has a sense of humor. A dark sense of humor. But few people like that thing, so it's understandable that many don't like it. It goes against most common movie taboos, which is good, it doesn't favor any side, and makes fun of itself as well. There are a few drawbacks, though, like the music and some scenes could've been better, but overall it is above average.

The movie is random, it is senseless, but it is also fun. I never thought Id say this, but if you like dark humor, go see this Uwe Boll film.

After being laid off from his factory job, getting snubbed at the welfare office, and witnessing his bedridden wife cheating on him with his next door neighbour, the once mild-mannered Postal Dude (Zack Ward) visits his Uncle Dave (Dave Foley) to take part in a plan which entails stealing and re-selling loads of items from the hot new toy craze of Krotchy dolls. Little do they know, that a small group of Taliban members is also planning the same heist at the same time.

Could it be? Uwe Boll finally pulls through with a great video game adaption? Well. . . no. But, he did finally manage to make a good and entertaining one! Say what you will about Boll and his complete lack of artistic talent (and I'll agree with it), but he does know how to stir up some controversy. Whether it's threatening Michael Bay, boxing critics, or making an extremely offensive and perverse new comedy, Uwe can cause problems. Now, obviously, as it's an Uwe Boll film, you're going to have to expect many of the negative elements that go with it: poor acting/writing/etc. However, as the film is so obviously meant to simply offend at any cost, it's not hard to overlook a lot of the flaws and just sit back and laugh at the stupidly ridiculous spectacle that is Postal. I mean, Uwe Boll actually stands onstage in his own film, playing himself, and says all of his movies are funded using Nazi gold and that children in the crowd arouse him. At least he's finally be honest, ya know? Anyway, if Tom Cruise, 9/11, cults, crap, trailers, racism, swearing, Dave Foley, police brutality, fat people, hicks, the handicapped, and over-the-top violence (often against children) sound like things worthy of a laugh, then you'll probably love this. If you're easily offended or reserve your giggles for a more sophisticated type of humour, then just keep on walking because this film is not for you.

Final verdict: 6/10.

-AP3-

Uwe Boll has done the impossible: create a game adaptation that stays at least somewhat true to the game; he has turned a game full of antisocial and offensive content into a movie full of antisocial and offensive content. So, as an adaptation, it's a success.

Unfortunately, it's still Uwe Boll we are dealing with here, so don't expect the movie to be actually any good. while it does have it's moment, "Postal" wears out his welcome very fast and becomes a pain to sit through.

At its core, Postal is a satire on the United States, as done by a twelve year old kid. Boll seems to think that offensiveness is linearly proportional to comedic value: the more offensive, the funnier, and the more exaggerated the funnier. This results in a movie that sets new levels of tastelessness while being extremely hit and miss. Yes, some gags do work but it seems to be pure luck. High points include the director satirizing himself, and people getting hit very violently by trucks and other vehicles. Low points include..well pretty much everything else.

After the initial surprise wears off, Postal simply becomes a bore to watch. Yes there is a good joke every and good point ten minutes, but everything else consists of hordes of annoying characters shooting and chasing each other all over the place for what seems to be an eternity.

This probably would have worked as a short movie, but it's just not enough content for something that lasts over 90 minutes (although it feels twice as long). There are nice ideas and nice tries, but they get hopelessly lost in endless and pointless action scenes and content that is offensive just for the sake of it 4/10