Ogre

These ultra-low reviews are hilarious. What were these people expecting, "Citizen Kane"? An award-winning film? Look at the DVD cover and the name of the film "Ogre." Why would anyone even waste their time on a flick like this if they didn't at least embrace them as guilty pleasures?

Directed by Steven Monroe and written by Chuck Reeves, 2008's "Ogre" is a low-budget TV monster flick in the manner of "It Waits," "Sasquatch Hunters" and countless other Syfy movies. These films are the modern counterpart to the low-budget creature features of decades ago like "Gargoyles" (1972), "Prophecy" (1979) and the Kolchak: The Night Stalker films/TV series. You either enjoy these types of pictures or you don't. I do. As reviewer John Patrick Fischner so perfectly puts it: "Imagination and legend is... about good and evil and the power of selfless courage against impossible odds. There is nothing more heroic than man against monster."

THE PLOT: Four youths hike into rural Pennsylvania looking for a legendary lost town and are amazed when they actually find it. The town's inhabitants are still stuck in the 19th century and living in dread of a hideous creature to whom they must sacrifice one of their own once a year. Adventure and horror ensue.

Most viewers will note that the story is a mishmash of numerous other films like "The Village (Widescreen Vista Series)," "Bay Cove" (i.e. "Bay Coven"), "The Blair Witch Project" and various other monster-in-the-woods flicks.

Although this is essentially a serious story the film naturally pokes fun at the whole notion of an ogre. The youths take it as a joke and so do the cops; my wife and I cracked up numerous times and so will you. It's just really hard to hear or say the word 'ogre' without giggling. Be that as it may, the joke stops when the creature literally starts ripping people's heads, legs, and arms off. Of course, some people may continue laughing, but that's all part of the enjoyment.

"Ogre" no doubt tried to capitalize on the surge in popularity of ogres with the success of the Shrek: The Whole Story Boxed Set (Shrek / Shrek 2 / Shrek the Third / Shrek Forever After) franchise. In fact, the beast in the film even resembles Shrek, albeit less cartooney and more malevolent-looking. Another comparison would be the cgi Hulk in Ang Lee's notorious 2003 Hulk (Widescreen 2-Disc Special Edition); the ogre here sorta looks like that Hulk's homely brother, if you can imagine that. Interestingly, unlike other monster flicks you'll fully see the creature right from the get-go. Although this destroys suspense it didn't personally bother me (as I don't like it when films play out the same way all the time).

Believe it or not, John Schneider of Dukes of Hazzard fame is on hand as one of the main characters and he does a fine job. He also looks great for being nigh 50 years-old. I don't get why people poke fun at him being in the film. So he played Bo Duke, so what?

Other cast highlights include Chelan Simmons who plays one of the two female protagonists. Chelan is one of the cutest freckled blonds you'll ever gaze your eyes upon next to Juliana Dever of "Sasquatch Hunters." Chelan also starred in "Chupacabra Terror." She has a very winsome disposition. Also on hand is Katharine Isabelle of "Ginger Snaps" fame. Both of these cuties have significant roles here.

Although the story takes place in Pennsylvania the film was shot in the sticks outside of Vancouver, BC. It's a good stand-in for PA except for one shot with a mountain in the background (the mountains of Pennsylvania are roundish ridges and look nothing like the mountains of the Great Northwest). Anyway, it's obvious the film was shot in the late Autumn; it has the cold/dreary Fall vibe throughout.

FINAL WORD: My wife and I had a fun time with this monster flick and so will you if it sounds like it'll trip your trigger.

GRADE: Borderline B- or C+

I only watched OGRE on the Sci-Fi channel because JOHN SCHNEIDER was in it and I hadn't seen any of his work in a long, long time. Always thought he was an interesting actor.

And he doesn't disappoint here. He's very good as the corrupt leader in a small town where each year a villager is sacrificed to keep the dreaded OGRE from killing them. To them, he is "that which must be fed." And feed he does, in a frenzy. But he's a CGI Shrek look-alike who is never too convincing. In addition, there are insufficient special effects and some bad acting by the younger members of the cast.

KATHARINE ISABELLE has to be singled out as the most offensive. She's a shrieking, whining and moronic girl who gets annoying after three minutes of screen time. Bad acting from a few others almost makes the film unwatchable in spots.

But through it all, JOHN SCHNEIDER takes his sinister role seriously and gives an eloquent performance that comes off as Shakespearean compared to some of the lesser players. A talented man, caught trapped in some bad material but doing his best to elevate it.

The backstory of a village threatened by a vicious ogre is interesting and it does get off to a good start with some fine atmospheric photography. But it soon becomes apparent that this is just another low-budget Sci-Fi Channel film that needed better dialog for its below-par cast of young thespians.

I was surprised they showed us the Ogre in the first 15 minutes, pleasantly. That was ballsy considering shrek looks about as real as this CGI discount special. That all said, I decided to suspend belief and judgment and just enjoy the movie. There is a bit of titillating gore to keep us gore people happy and some of the acting is decent. The ogre is in thew movie often and its not dark out...a refreshing change. None of this movie is bad but then again none of it is all that good. Besides the below par CGI (which was forgivable) I have to say the editing was the worst I have seen in some time. The characters were likable and the story fun.

Worth while for B movie fans and those who like your Shrek "R" rated.

Other than John Schneider starring as the village leader, there's not much to recommend OGRE. This TV movie looks like it was put together by the same people who worked on that incredibly bad Nazi Frankentein monster flick a few years ago. In fact, the monster here is virtually identical to that one. A group of teens stumbles across an 18th century village stuck in time. Once a year, a villager is offered up to the title character to keep it appeased. The teens accidentally let it loose and all hell breaks loose. The goofy plot is right out of M. Night's THE VILLAGE, which itself was pretty shabby. Katharine Isabelle of GINGER SNAPS fame plays one of the teens, and I wish the ogre had killed her first. She was that annoying. The CGI is atrocious as usual, which is par for the course with a SciFi Channel flick. The monster walks around with no sense of weight or mass, and most of its kills avoid combining the actors in the same shot with the creature, a sure sign of a very low budget. Sad.

I didn't expect a lot from a lowish budget B movie but I admit I quite enjoyed this film for being eerily atmospheric and for the impressive acting by the main characters. The ogre's menacing growl from deep in the forest felt quite unnerving.

John Schneider slotted very neatly into his powerful convincing character. Clearly a versatile actor!

I would have given this film a 7 if it wasn't for ( and I think most people would agree with me here ) a very ify ogre that seemed to be dropped in from a below average video game. When you think of the possible great GGI available in 2008 the ogre certainly could have been vastly improved ( budget allowing ). Yep, a well presented, very well acted, partly 19th Century set sci-fi fantasy film let down by the 19th century CGI.