The Ten Commandments

I can't give this a 1 because the story line was fabulous and Biblical. However, the first 30 SECONDS of the movie, I knew my artist husband would hem and haw through the whole thing. The animation was horrible!!! This is 2007 and it looked like it should have been played in 1987...I should have known when my group of 5 were sitting in the theater and NO ONE else showed up, that this was not going to be a great movie. Prince of Egypt was a fantastic movie...I just am not sure why this one was not....Come on Hollywood, we want Christian movies, but we want them to be worth spending 8.50 on...Needless to say, this will not be one for the collection.

Yes, the story has been told many times before, on film alone. It also reminds me of a well-known old book. I didn't expect major liberties to be taken with the familiar story, but, what is the point of a new version which offers nothing new? The movie seems aimed at children, and adults with child-like sensibilities who have never heard this story before. The presentation is cornier than my Grannie's hominy stew! A serious and earnest mood seems appropriate, but the dialogue and mannerisms of the characters are so simplistic as to make them seem laughable. There are occasional attempts at humor, which are truly pathetic. These attempts are not only not funny, they pale compared to the attempts at humor from the old Davey and Goliath series. Many of the actors chosen for the voice work simply don't work. The choice of Christian Slater is found to be poor within ten minutes of his first utterance. There is a Kirk Douglas-like man among the complaining Hebrews, his voice rising, falling, and cracking much like the similar voice from Ren and Stimpy. There is a short, fat, crude, whining Hebrew who seems to be a caricature of a modern citified heathen. He becomes obnoxious early on, and never stops. Lastly, the teeth. Baby Moses has at least thirty teeth.....a miracle, perhaps? The teeth of the adults tend to glow, and seem like a set of dentures a bit too large for their mouths. All in all, a great disappointment.

Looking back at how awesome the 1956 Ten Commandments movie makes me realize how great religious movies can be. You don't have to be Christian or religious to appreciate how beautiful these films can be. This, on the other hand, is the second worst depiction of the Bible I've seen in my entire life, just to "Joshua And The Promised Land". It actually makes me realize that it's been a long time since I've read my Bible. Anyway, the CGI in this film is absolutely horrendous. It looks like awful video game graphics. I look back at how old video game CGI doesn't hold up.

Even then, the first CGI movies seem to hold up a lot better! Everything and everyone in this movie is so ugly to look at. I guess it's pretty faithful to the Bible. What also makes it bad is how annoying the characters are. There's this one fat guy who does nothing but complain the entire movie. I also don't like the way Moses immediately accepts the fact that he's Hebrew. "Prince Of Egypt" showed that a good Biblical movie could be made, especially one based on the book of Exodus. While I personally don't find to be that on the same level as the 1956 epic, you still should really check that one out over this. I heard it performed terribly at the box office to the point it's not even in Leonard Maltin's book. *1/2

How can you ruin such a great story? Answer: A. Insipid direction.

B. World's worst imagery and animation.

The story flounders as it focuses on the relationship of Moses to the Pharoah ("Ramses".) Were they at one point buddies? Did something sour Ramses and turn him into a grumpalumpagus? Who knows or cares? But hold on, the worst is yet to come: the nutso physiques of the characters. The leading men (Moses, Ramses, Aaron) seem to all sport chest implants that would shame the late Anna Nicole Smith. OK, so Moses and Ramses were raised in wealth, how did Aaron manage to acquire such gargantuan pecs while some of his compadres appear as emaciated as a displaced person.

Legs and torsos seem to have only the most casual acquaintance with one another. Eyes are over-sized in the manner of the Keane kids of the 60s.

Larding out the cast (pardon the pun)are anonymous Hebrew supernumeraries who are impossibly wide and fat. While that might be very progressive in giving work to morbidly obese cartoon characters, it's very jarring to the viewer. Kids (baby Moses, young Miriam, the Pharoah's first-born) manage to be repugnant rather than endearing.

Oh, and the color palette. WAY over the top.

The only positives: Eliot Gould and Ben Kingsley.

I saw this shortly after it opened in town. It was playing only in an obscure theater located in a low-end mall. I'd say there were under 40 other customers.

What a dud.

Finally a movie I can watch with my kids that tells the story of Moses in a way they can understand and enjoy! What a thrill to hear the voices of actors we love as the voices of Moses, God and others in the film. The movie has the great talents of Elliott Gould, Christian Slater, Ben Kingsley and Alfred Molina to name a few! What a line up! I loved this movie, as it showed Moses as an ordinary man who became a prophet, who did the unimaginable for Gods people. This movie helped to teach my children the awesome power of God and how we have our own power to do good in the world. Moses was an ordinary man yes, but the amazing Ed Naha created a character that reflected someone who was humble with an added sense of humor...A MOSES that was understood by children who had extraordinary adventures, we shared this movie as a family glued to our seats! Thank you Promenade Pictures for a truly wonderful family movie!