An Asylum film.
In this particular travesty to film making the big bad guy is called Zealous who looks like a biker dressed for The Matrix Con, and appears to have been tricked into looking down some of those eye-blackening joke binoculars.
Most of the ladies look like they didn't bother changing from the nightclub, and most of the guys look like they ran through a Halloween store and Army Surplus with 30 seconds to grab whatever they could, except one guy who is wearing half a Transformers suit he bought on Wish.
Another guy's costume is a big plastic chain wrapped around his naked chest in an X shape, with black jeans and a BFG, and at one point he has a fight in a desert that's so awkward you can see them both looking for each other to hit their mark before they do their next move.
There's a lot of sets made from ill-fitting plywood flats with gaps between them and stuff like cutlery drying trays and bottle crates glued on backwards with their bottoms sprayed grey, somebody bought an industrial quantity of fluorescent tubes, but this is the first time I've ever seen a cheap sci-fi interior set where the budget couldn't stretch to some flashing fairy lights pretending to be a computer panel.
There are no windows inside the spaceship interiors and at no point do we ever get to see what everybody is staring at behind the camera as they pilot them, only disconnected cuts to CGI exteriors, but they do have some lovely bucket seats.
The dialogue, oh god oh god the dialogue, the only slight interest is listening for rip-off lines like 'where is the location of the hidden (rebel) base' and 'watch your backs here they come' which might make for a drinking game, I guess.
So bad it's bad, I was hoping it would at least be funny but even a devout teetotaller would need a drink.
On the plus side... nope, I've got nothing.
