Renegades

I only watched this movie to see what became of Lee Majors, that I used to watch when I was a kid, in The Fall Guy and The Six Million Dollar Man, two immensely popular series when I was young. I wondered what character he would play as an 83 years old actor. Not a very plausable one to be honest, a retired veteran that still thinks he can kick some a##. Like his old colleagues in this movie they're going on a revenge expedition, it's more laughable than anything else. Danny Trejo and Lee Majors have very small roles, their names were just been used to fill the movie poster and attract people to watch this mediocre movie. The acting is far below average, almost painful to watch. The producer or whoever does the casting must have a weak spot for women that had plastic surgeries as almost every actress in Renegades looked like an abomination. Unbelievable what women (and some men) are capable to do to look younger. A mission that 90% of the time is doomed to fail. There are so many examples now of failed procedures that you would think plastic surgery is a dying business but people continue to have body transformations in the hope of having that everlasting young look and instead they look atrocious. In Renegades there are plenty examples of surgeries gone wrong. Those actresses are now doomed to play in these kind of movies, b-movies or in this case z-movies as it's that bad. The producer was probably looking for cheap actresses as I can't see any of those actresses playing in a decent movie in the future, so the only roles they will get are in very low quality movies like this one.

This film came as close to me giving a film 1/10 as I've ever been, it's truly appalling. The writing is truly terrible and people who produce this standard of story content have no business writing anything. They clearly are just not ready or talented enough to produce anything for public consumption.

I would be hard pressed to let friends or family litmus test anything this bad, and I'm not saying this to be cute. The writing is simply atrocious, and but for the standards that have slithered below sea level in the past few years as independant films become more easily and cheaply produced, this film would never have been made.

However! Even the writing bad as it is cannot compete with the direction which defines a new level in incompetence and ineptitude. It's actually quite something that direction can be so misguided that it can even make reasonably competent actors look like they're performing in their first grade school play.

There is little point in going into detail on any other aspect of the film since the fundamentals are so underwhelming, but suffice to say, this films stinks.

I know people tend to say flippant things like 'worst film I've ever watched' etc, with movies they dislike and I can for once understand the sentiment. Truthfully, I've seen many worse films, but this IS the worst film I've seen in 2022 which is some accolade.

I love London gangster revenge movies so I was looking forward to this one as it has some stellar cast members. Unfortunately it also has some bad actors and some poor writing. One of the worst cast members is married to the writer. Go figure.

Ian Ogilvy is, as always, a delight. The underrated Paul Barber is superb and Billy Murray does what he does best. So nice to see Lee Majors on screen again. However, Stephanie Beacham is far too old to be playing a serving senior police officer and looks as if she is on life support. Sothcott is hopelessly miscast as a Detective Inspector. She can't act and looks like a victim of a botched Botox procedure. And it's all a bit confused. She carries a gun but clearly nobody showed her how to use it and why would a DI in London be carrying a gun on a routine enquiry anyway.

The writing is clichéd and some of the dialogue is pathetic. I felt sorry for the actors who had to deliver it but hopefully they all had a nice pay day.

And that leaves Patsy Kensit. She has a strange role that tries to pull it all together and give the story meaning but she doesn't pull it off. The blurb say 4 old SAS soldiers get together but the lead goodies clearly says he was in the Royal Anglian and wears their beret. Such inaccuracy in the trailer info says it all.

Very disappointed.

Really, all the marks I give for this are based around the fact it contains some people that I've always liked. Ian Ogilvy, Lee Majors, Danny Trejo, Paul Barber, etc. And in essence, I have seen a lot worse films, but if you're expecting too much, you're in for disappointment. The plot is net curtain thin, the b part actors and henchmen are really pretty awful and the editing and dialog are pretty poor at times. Also, the lady who played the investigating police officer called Moore was really awful, plus she looked like maybe she was made up to look really odd, maybe it was the intention of the film as I can't imagine anyone would choose to have things done to make them look like that on purpose.

However, in the end, it provided a basic level of entertainment and there was a element of fun, so if you're caught short for something to watch, there are worse things out there........probably....... somewhere..........with a bit of a search.

Yeah, it's bloody awful, on so many levels.

Nick Moran was kinda ok, overall but still 5/10 level, due to the script/plot.

Every dialog was like a knife into my heart - you could not feel more like... you know what - I don't have the vocabulary to describe how cliche every little bit of it was.

I understand some fandom for B movies, this is not B for me, C/D at best.

YET (surprisingly!) I gave it 2/10 and not 1/10 simply because I watched all of ity, still, somehow, wanting to see how it ends and the production was ok-ish, to some extent.

I lost respect to any actors involved though and will never, ever understand that atrocity of the police woman - where the hell did they find her? She could not possibly have been accepted to the police force with that duck-bill of lips. That was so ugly and unreal, I had to look away from the screen in all scenes she was in, otherwise I'd have had bad nightmares.

Yet again, just because of her and incredibly awful speaking parts/cliched dialogues for all characters, I want to show it to people, to have a drunken night in to piss ourselves with laughter. This alone deserves an extra point, so 2/10 it is!

Bloody hell, that image of her (police officer) is =wedged into my brain now and it is very hard to get rid of!