Blonde

Three hours of sheer boredom with the whole focus of the film being on Norma Jean's father who abandoned her mother before she was born. Nothing new on offer. A lot of nude shots, Marilyn calling her husbands "Daddy" the babies she couldn't have, her intelligence got short shrift and her drug taking a huge focus, fed by her handlers.

John F. Kennedy, the womanizer, is depicted in a particularly revolting scene.

Shock value ruled the day and nothing new was added.

Totally disappointing and the words that comes to mind are crude and vulgar. Good imitative performance from Ana.

But not worth a re-watch or an award of any kind.

2/10.

"I am not an orphan." Marilyn Monroe (Ana de Armas)

The iconic blonde bombshell is an orphan throughout this unnerving, distancing, disturbing biopic of Marilyn Monroe.

In fact, Blonde is an unremittingly, unhappy imaginative take on the elusive Hollywood superstar who became a template for achieving fame and losing identity. As I remember Renee Zellweger playing Judy Garland, I am reminded how intensely Hollywood depicts its neurotic superstars. Joyce Carol Oates's 2000 free-wheeling study of Marilyn helped writer/director Andrew Dominik fantasize as well.

Blonde is a study in black of the lurid and horrid parts of Marilyn's life, circumscribed by her three romances with the controlling men who themselves seemed lost in their parents' legacy: Hollywood scions Charles Chaplin Jr. (Xavier Samuel) and Edward G. Robinson Jr. (Evan Williams); an abusive Joe DiMaggio (Bobby Cannavale); and an odd marriage to Arthur Miller (Adrien Brody). No one appears to acknowledge her wit and smarts-mostly just her body and elusive allure.

Not one relationship ends right, excepting briefly Miller's; no one takes into account the intelligence under that physically-remarkable woman. The film even voices over her estranged father (Tyghe Runyan), who is never close when he promises to be. Of all the abusers, "Daddy" is constantly on her mind as she hopes for his return. Her mother, Gladys (Julianne Nicholson), descending into madness, is more a horror than a love. Marilyn says about her deadly fragmented life: "It's like a jigsaw puzzle, but you're not the one to put it together."

In one delicate scene, she converses with Miller about the similarity between a Chekov character and Miller's, Miller is astonished at the insight and imputes it to someone else. The audience becomes aware of her hidden depth.

But that intellectual side is constantly hidden by Marilyn's sexual persona, dramatically caught in another beautifully filmed moment when her dress flares over the grate in The Seven Year Itch. This display of her butt provokes DiMaggio's abuse and our prurience, neither in her favor. Dominik himself has exploited Norma Jeane, for there must have been more than sex to that vulnerable star. What he does capture well is her need for love and acceptance, denied her in her short life.

Throughout Dominik uses digital wizardry and unique angles, such as when her raucous threesome bed changes into Niagara Falls, niftily connecting her life with her film, Niagara. At other times he shifts between color and black and white and varies aspect ratios, I suppose, to connect her career with her life because of the many kinds of films she made-think Some Like It Hot, The Misfits, and Gentlemen Prefer Blondes for the range of her film experiences.

The lovely lost soul herself, so heavily handled in the persistent flashbacks of her abusive mother and disengaged father, best expresses the split persona that leads her to an early death:

"Marilyn doesn't exist. When I come out of my dressing room, I'm Norma Jeane. I'm still her when the camera is rolling. Marilyn Monroe only exists on the screen." Norma Jeane

It's the real Norma Jeane who should be the subject of Blonde, with speculation about her mind and talents, not just her body. Dominik has caught her charisma but missed her soul.

On Netflix.

In the 18th century Bedlam changed from a hospital and became a sideshow. People came to London and paid to watch the mentally ill.

In the 21st century Hollywood has reinvented this kind of horror show.

The makers of Blonde have made a vile, disgusting, unbalanced fiction about a real person who had a tragic childhood and dressed it up as a feminist lecture. It is amazing that anyone who suffered such an abusive early life could have reinvented herself and become a world wide star and icon. When she was "not well" instead of getting the medical help she needed Blonde was physically and mentally abused and fed alcohol and drugs so that she could continue to make money for the studios. Credit to star actors who turned down the role of Blonde having read the script.

BREAKING NEWS: Jan 2023 Blonde, has received the most nominations for this year's Razzies with eight nominations. It is up for worst picture and worst screenplay, while Andrew Dominik is up for worst director, and is named in the worst screen couple category. Blonde,is described by the Razzies as a film "movie-goers liked even less than critics did". Filter the reviews by 1 star ratings to see how true this is.

What a truly disappointing film this is. It offers us a really slow, sterile and disjointed - almost episodic - depiction of just how Marilyn Monroe's life might have panned out. For a start, I couldn't decide whether Ana de Armas was really Lady Gaga or Scarlett Johansson (both of whom would have acquitted themselves better, I'd say) as she offers an admittedly intense, but remarkably uninvolved performance. We move along from chapter to chapter in her life hindered by some fairly weak and uninspiring dialogue and seriously intrusive scoring in what becomes an increasingly shallow and lacklustre fashion. The photography does try hard - it does offer us a sense of intimacy, but the whole thing is presented in such a stylised and un-natural manner that it is frequently difficult to tell whether she is/was a "real" woman. Her marriages are treated in an almost scant manner - and her relationship with JFK is reduced to something rather implausibly one-sided and sordid showing nothing of how their relationship might have come to be. It has no soul, this film. Aside from her glamour - which was, even then, hardly unique we are not really introduced to any of the nuances of her character, we are left guessing a lot of the time as to just how she did become such a superstar, and how she spiralled so inevitably into a maelstrom of booze and pills. It relies to a considerable extent on the viewer's existing knowledge of, and affection for, this flawed lady. Adrien Brody and Bobby Cannavale don't really have much chance to add anything as her husbands and the highly speculative relationship between her and Charlie Chaplin Jnr (Xavier Samuel) and his sexually ambiguous partner-in-crime Edward G Robinson Jr (Scoot McNairy) does suggest something of the rather profligate and debauched existence that some lived in Hollywood, but again their characters are also largely undercooked and again, we are largely left to use our own imagination. It is far, far too long and in a packed cinema, I could see people looking at the ceiling just once too often. Watchable, certainly, but a real missed opportunity to offer us something scintillating and tantalising about this most of iconic of women.

Marilyn Monroe was a great artist and this movie could've been a great opportunity to teach younger audiences about who she was. But for some reason, they decide to tell a fictional story. She has the same name, plays in the same movies, and sings the same songs, but many events are made up. It's so misleading when movies do this. It's not a movie about Marilyn Monroe, it's a movie about a mentally ill actress. Monroe was more than a mentally ill sex symbol. She was intelligent and a great artist - which doesn't come across in this movie.

Ana de Armas is okay in the movie. She looks and sounds like Monroe, but she is naked for an uncomfortable amount of time in the movie. It's not just the fact that she's naked, but she's naked for no apparent reason. If her being naked adds nothing to the story you might as well let her put some clothes on.