The Bell Keeper

A cheap B-movie horror about some friends going out to film in the woods in search of a legendary bell. The story goes that those who ring the bell are thereafter cursed by a demon, and of course these numbskulls have to go and see for themselves what it's all about. It's business as usual for the genre, with a small cast and only middling scares, although it's surprisingly well paced which means it's more watchable than some. The biggest surprise here is a rare foray into the horror genre for former wrestling star Randy Couture, best known for THE EXPENDABLES movies; he gives the best performance here and is quite likeable.

Well I guess he is keeping the bell ("safe")? No pun intended - actually it is not the bell he is interested in. Just trying to use the smallest amount of sense and logic will ... well kill this movie (or the mood you should be in to watch it).

Suspension of disbelief and characters doing weird stuff in horror movies is ... well normal. But this really tries the boundaries of every and anything there is .. including dialog and more. Randy is having fun ... but the question is: will you?

It's kind of hard to forge a decent horror film, when the concept is to make a cheap pastiche, based on an idiotic premise.

The whole thing is effectively a mash-up of Evil Dead and Knock At The Cabin - which is an act of blasphemy in itself.

And tries way too hard to force a horror-comedy angle into the storyline...which just doesn't work.

Because it makes the whole thing seem confused about what it wants to be.

Does it want to be a comedy? Or serious horror?

One can only assume they've tried to make it the best of both worlds.

However, these two different paths mix like oil and water in this example.

With the crux of the storyline coming off extremely forced at best.

It's just not a very good film.

But I guess that's what you get when you try to emulate a hack like Shyamalan.

It's not surprising that this was made by the same director who brought us the travesty that is Snow Falls (among other awful 2023 releases).

And while it might not be as bad as that film...it's still pretty bad.

2 out of 10.

A film with four teens - 2 girls and 2 boys who are dating couples - plus Liam, who is the brother of one of the other guys. There is also a weird filling station woman, 2 dumb-ass redneck local cops, a girl looking for her missing brother and an immortal called Hank the killer.

The film begins with the two couples being typical whining females and unfunny males. They are a cringe quartet who are totally unlikable and whom you hope are killed off as soon as possible; because they just get on your nerves.

From that bad start the film goes on and on and on, but does not get any better. Its a shame really because I thought that the plot outline was good, a story that could have made a decent film. Unfortunately there was just nothing in the input given by any of the cast and, it just dragged on slowly. To me it rated as a C film and I stuck with it to the end and was very thankful when it ended.

No tension, no scary moments, no shocks and no horror...so no point to it having been made!

Not much of a plot here.. all we really need to know is that there is a cursed bell that random adventurers go and ring, and that's bad. A dude named Hank with a cauliflower ear is gonna kill those in range to hear it. There is a reason for all this, but you have to watch it to find out why. It's pretty cheap, draggy and nonsensical, but it does have just enough quirkiness to keep it mildy entertaining. We have Randy Couture, with a straight forward performance, and a quick run in with Bonnie Aarons (The Nun) being the most fun. The Liam and Brittany characters were decent, the Sheriff being the worst. Couture groupies might like this the most.