Maybe I Do

It starts out with several minutes of credits - and I'm not talking about names on top of scenic landscapes in the background, literally just white text on a black screen. But, at least the original song "Always You" was playing, which I liked. It was very obvious that the story was originally a play and was not adapted much for a screenplay of a movie. There was a lot of dialogue...I mean A LOT. And sometimes it seemed like they were talking in circles or in a translated language because I didn't even understand what they were talking about. It also felt like it didn't have enough characters and lacked a variety of scenery and settings. With such a great cast list and well-known writer/director (for TV anyways), I had higher hopes but there was much room for improvement in terms of making it into a romcom movie.

I grew up with boy meets world and am lucky to call Michael jacobs an acquaintance so I had to support this film, but it was very odd. Like someone else said, it was almost like it was meant to be a play. The plot is basic enough. A couple try to decide if they're meant to be together forever and marry so they bring in their parents. Problem is the parents have been cheating on each other. With each other. It was hilarious at first, especially when everyone all arrived at dinner together, but it slowly unravels. Emma roberts character and her boyfriend basically just disappear from the film at one point. The movie just becomes everyone having inner dialogues, with each other. The movie goes in so many circles and Michael can't seem to decide what he wants to say ultimately. Sadly I can't recommend it. Such a waste of a talented cast too.

I had to put on subtitles for this. For a talky romantic comedy with no explosions. Christopher Nolan this is not.

Directors: pay attention to audio. At this point, we're nearly back to silent film with how badly y'all handle this stuff. Movie watchers all watched the explainer about why movie audio is so bad these days. Did movie directors? You should. I don't care if your actors want to sound more "naturalistic" with their mumbles and their whispers. They have a job to do and they are not doing it if I can't hear the words coming out of their mouths.

Apparently my review is too short until now.

The story isn't bad but the conversations are unbelievably bad. None of them flow and most of time not even believable. I can't imagine anyone one in any of the situations would behave the way every single characters does in every scene. It's like they are all awkward individuals that can't communicate or act appropriately. Maybe one person might be weird and a bad conversationalist, but everyone in the movie? It makes the whole movie hard to get into and believe. I don't think it's bad acting, although it comes off that way, because it's a good cast. I think it is the writing that ruined the whole movie. It seems lazy and not thought out at all. There isn't a single articulate conversation in the whole movie. Such a bummer because the cast is great.

This was a movie of such contrived drivel that having to watch 'mature' characters who hadn't learned anything about how to be in this world along the way of their collective 260+ years on this planet made me squirm uncomfortably in my seat that the only saving grace was that the movie came in at 92 minutes in length.

So fed up was I, that without wanting to, a fairly loud sigh of exasperation left my upper respiratory tract and caused the biggest laugh of the night in the theater I attended of this star studded dud of an attempt at movie making. You shouldn't be surprised if something similar happens at your theater also. Hard Pass!!