Return to Nuke 'Em High Volume 1

How to review a movie like this? The first minute or so we get a fast-forward recap of all the previous Nuke 'Em High movies. The nuclear plant was destroyed and an organic food plant has been build on top of the ruins. A new girl starts school. She's given a hard time by some cute tough chick. On Taco Tuesday the food plant provides the ingredients. All the kids who eat it become mutants. The new girl as a pet duck that also becomes infected and infects the new girl in the craziest way. In the meantime new girl and tough girl have fallen for each other and now both become mutants as well as the school's singing club which have become The Cretins.

It's been years since I've seen a Troma movie. I never was much of a fan. And Return to Nuke 'Em High Volume 1 isn't going to turn me into one either. It's got great gore scenes, very good nudity from the two gorgeous leads: Catherine Corcoran and Asta Paredes. That's about it. The humor wouldn't be funny to 10 year olds. It's more interested in being offensive and dumb, as expected. It even manages to ruin the two main characters. It's impressive though to see a young cast so committed to doing whatever is asked of them. A shame Troma doesn't know what to with them. Still I'll probably check out part 2 just so see more of Cathy and Asta.

I will say I've never seen any of the other movies in this series, though I'm familiar with the Toxic Crusader cartoon from the 90s. This movie looks right up my alley but I unfortunately did not enjoy this at all. It's corny and goofy to the point of being really annoying. Not funny, not scary, not cool - a boring and aggravating waste of time. It actually pissed me off I watched this, especially with the cliffhanger ending.

The Troma Team and Lloyd Kaufman have been on a roll ever since the 1997 release of Tromeo and Juliet. That film spawned a second golden age of Troma which gave us Terror Firmer, Citizen Toxie, and Poultrygeist. These are all some of the very best, most inspired films that the famed independent studio has put out in its nearly 40 years of existence. This golden age might have come to an end with Return to Nuke 'Em High Volume 1.

This remake (I guess?) of Troma's 1986 Class of Nuke 'Em High certainly has all of the signature Troma elements in place. Gore, gross-out humor, gratuitous nudity, and social satire are present in abundance. Something seems to be missing this time around, however. Perhaps the writing is not as sharp this time. I can't quite put my finger on it. The film is also noticeably slicker than Troma's usual efforts. Lloyd Kaufman is a noted devotee of 35mm film and all of his previous directing efforts were shot on film. I'm not sure about Return to Nuke 'Em High. It almost looks like it was shot digitally. There are also a number of CGI effects this time around, which I think is a first for Troma. The cast was quite good and the actors did their best with the uneven script. I liked the soundtrack quite a lot also.

To sum up, Return to Nuke 'Em High Part 1 will not rank among Troma's best. It does not compare to The Toxic Avenger, Terror Firmer, Citizen Toxie or Poultrygeist. It just didn't knock my socks off like those films did. However, it is an entertaining film with a few moments of brilliance. It is certainly better than Class of Nuke 'Em High Parts 2 and 3. Here's hoping that Part 2 is an improvement. The trailer looks promising.

It looks like this return to Tromas' popular "Nuke 'Em High" series will be one that will divide people. Some may embrace it, others may be either sorely disappointed or even offended. Of course, the whole point of a Troma film is gleeful, in your face insanity with no regard for restraint or political correctness. Everything is fair game with this sequel, directed by none other than Lloyd Kaufman himself. He guides everything with a flair for the utterly childish, the incredibly stupid, and the unapologetically manic. Personally speaking, this viewer had a reasonably good time with it. When it scored a hit, it was very funny, but it could also be pretty tiresome at times. And that, as well, may turn off some viewers because of the "trying too hard" aspect to the presentation.

The movie is a melange of sex, nudity, budding lesbian romance, extremely tacky and yet very colourful gore, goof ball songs, (mostly) way over the top performances, and satirical jabs. The "story" deals with a health food outfit, Tromorganics, setting up shop where the Tromaville nuclear power plant used to be. Wouldn't you know it: whatever secret ingredients they're using turn out to be deadly, either destroying or transforming the student body at Tromaville High. For one thing, the glee club turns into a marauding band of "Cretins" with a taste for violence and abuse.

The mostly no name cast does act with gusto. Foxy ladies Catherine Corcoran (as rich new girl in school Lauren) and Asta Paredes (as rebel blogger Chrissy) are very easy on the eyes. Babette Bombshell (now there's a name for you) is amusing as the principal; B movie legend Debbie Rochon plays the part of Coach Kotter and Lloyd himself turns up as nefarious Lee Harvey Herzkauf.

Ultimately, what's unfortunate about this movie is that it exhausts its better material early on and does lose a fair bit of momentum. At least the ending does appropriately leave one wanting more and waiting to see what happens in Volume 2.

Six out of 10.

Troma is at it's best again. What the guy who wrote the other review saw is wrong is everything right with this movie. It brings everything you want, the grossness, the sexiness and the ridiculousness. This time around though there is actually some acting talent to be found. Asta Paredes, Catherine Corcoran are really good actresses who I suppose we'll see in more movies in the future. As for the movie itself. The plot is useless, as always the effects gory and purposefully bad but that's why we're watching this is it. There is for instant a car flipping over, where you see that it's taken from some other movie but you don't care. Another funny thing about this movie are the texts put in by the makers explaining why everything is logical. They are great and really add to this movie. The end really makes you want more. Sadly Even LLoyd Kaufman himself doesn't know when the second Part will be ready yet.