Eat, Love, London

Some films are bad. Eat Love London is something else entirely - a baffling, beige mess of rom-com clichés, fake accents, and acting so wooden you could build a canoe out of the entire cast.

We're told our main character is a brilliant American chef recovering from heartbreak - though we never see her in America, never meet the mysterious fiancé, and never witness anything resembling actual heartbreak. She just turns up in London, sighs a lot, and pretends to be a fully-formed adult while delivering every line in a fake American accent that sounds like Siri having a breakdown.

Within minutes of arriving, she meets a brooding food critic who stares at her like she's the last truffle on Earth, then offers her a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity based on... nothing. A ten-minute chat, maybe a mildly edible plate of food, and boom - life changed. Realistic? About as much as Hogwarts is a viable education system.

Now, let's talk about Rebecca - her best friend, business partner, and emotional life coach. This woman spends the entire film comforting, coaching, and coddling our flaky lead through every meltdown. But here's the thing: the actress playing Rebecca is objectively terrible. Her line delivery is so unnatural it feels like she's reading from a cue card just off-screen. Every sentence lands with the emotion of a parking ticket. It's not even charmingly bad - it's just bad. You can actually see the acting. And once you notice it, it's impossible to unsee.

Add to that the fact that she's meant to be a savvy Notting Hill restaurateur, yet dresses like an adult who's been styled by a preschooler with a soft spot for dungarees and oversized cardigans. It's like the costume department was told: "Whimsical... but make it unhinged."

The rest of the film staggers along through limp plot turns, chemistry-free romance, and one of the most undeserved happy endings ever. No stakes. No growth. No reason to care. It's all soft-focus filler and shallow vibes with characters who have the emotional complexity of scented candles.

Verdict: Eat Love London is a painfully undercooked rom-com that serves up unbelievable characters, a lead with the acting range of a sat-nav, and a supporting cast that feels like they wandered in from a local amateur panto. The only thing less believable than the romance is the fact this got funded.

I wanted to love this movie but lead actress kept getting in the way. She looked and acted like a 12 year old brat. Poor acting skills and I guess the writer shares in the poor role. A head chef is texting like a high schooler, cannot walk down the street without bumping into multiple ppl???

No, we had to turn it off which is too bad since her pen pal and leading man were good actors. Love the filming and scenery.

This plays like a bad Hallmark movie including the age differences between the male and female leads. It's gross.

Foote should have insisted she could be smart and romantic not just play a school girl on a movie.

After decades of Americans doing terrible depictions of 'British' accents and culture, it's refreshing to see this movie is annoying my US friends!

In a world of increasing misinformation/misrepresentation, many of these shows, wherever set and made, are also very flawed in their writing, which could and should be improved across the genre.

On the upside, any inclusion of actual locations is always great in productions, and a good use of the budget, especially where a number of viewers are likely to have visited.

Not a bad storyline, but way too many holes. Stella, played by a British actress, has a poor American accent. She's supposed to be from Montana, but I think they confused Montana with Kentucky or someplace green and with a southern accent. She has loads of free time, even in the evening when she's supposed to be working. I just found the whole production to be a bit ridiculous at times. Theo was charming, but the best part of the film were the scenes with Stella's friend Rebecca. The production is colorful and engaging. But I couldn't get past Stella's poor accent and the many holes in the storyline.

The problem with this movie was casting. The story is your typical romantic arc, albeit a silly plot arc, and had the characters been more sympathetic, I might have gotten past insipid plot. But the lead actress is a spoiled, petulant teenager, lacking in the tenacious drive and talent of a true chef. You can't support her romance because you can't support her. You might think it's just the lines, but it's more the delivery of the lines. I felt sorry for her "best friend." After all, who wants a friend who doesn't put the same passion and work ethic into the job you offered her. Nobody. Nobody wants that nonsense in their lives. Nobody is a glutton for that much punishment so as to risk livelihood for such a poor friend. And, don't ask me about the hero because when ever the lead actress was on screen - which was all the time - you needed to close your eyes and ears. Just yuck.