I was going to the beach with my girlfriend's family. They're all really big into soccer and her brother was this soccer superstar. And I'm hanging out at the beach with all these jocks and then there's me. I know nothing about sports. I don't even know what a sport is. I have to confess that I'm a little afraid of birds. I am...whatever. So we're sitting on the beach and this bird flies toward me and all I could say was 'Pleaaaase!' Like 'Please don't hurt me,' 'Please don't fly in my direction?' I don't know. And everyone cracked up and was doing impressions of it the whole rest of the day.
