Cinquanta sfumature di nero

I sat through the last half of 50 shades darker today because my sister was using my Macbook to watch it... Let me sum it up for you:

Him: "I'm not good with people because I'm mysterious."

Her: "I like mysterious, but I'm scared cause I'm fragile."

Him: "Don't be afraid, I'm the one who is afraid... of hurting you."

*Have Some Sex*

Her: "You're so thoughtful, maybe I misjudged you. Now I want to be hurt... just not emotionally."

Him: "I always hurt people, but I would never hurt you... unless you wanted me to."

Her: "Ouch, you hurt me. Now my feelings are hurt and I'm sad and my whole life hurts."

Him: "I'm sorry if I hurt you. I'll try harder, but I don't think I'll ever change.'

Her: "I'm gonna pretend like I didn't hear that, but please don't hurt me again. I trust you to change for me- projects are fun."

Him: "Put these things in your ass."

Her: "No." Him: "Okay, I'm not good with people because I'm mysterious."

*Have Some Sex Again*

Aaaand Credits