Being Charlie

Jimmy: Hey, I never sucked dick.

Charlie Mills: [startled] Good for you.

Jimmy: Some guy did blow me once, though. What? It was for some H.

Charlie Mills: Some guy sucked your dick for heroin?

Jimmy: Sure. Why is it such a big deal? I'm not gay. I was desperate.

Charlie Mills: But... you gave some guy heroin to suck YOUR dick, so technically speaking...

Jimmy: Wait. No, no, no, no. He gave ME the H. I was jonesing.

Charlie Mills: Oh. Wait. That doesn't make any sense.

Jimmy: It was a fucked up time. I'm not proud of it.

Charlie Mills: Hold... but wait, wait, hold on, hold on. Some guy gave YOU heroin to suck YOUR dick.

Jimmy: Yeah. It's not that complicated.

Charlie Mills: But...

Jimmy: Addiction is a disease, man!

Charlie Mills: No, I get WHY you did it. I get what YOU got out of it, but what does HE get out of it?

Jimmy: Fuck if I know.

Charlie Mills: I can't believe I'm saying this, but that doesn't sound like such a bad deal.

Jimmy: Yeah, if you close your eyes and think of Jessica Alba, it's really not that much of a difference.