Fuga nella giungla

The dull, gray story of a Dutch girl(with no accent, mind you)who gets lost in the jungles of Bachman's floral..err..Tanzania. She is found and taken in by the most multi-ethnic 'native tribe' that I've ever seen, including a woman who looks like she put on too much bronzer before she went on set. These people seem to think that she's some kind of 'White Goddess', which is weird since they call the two meaty, wooden white guys who appear to rescue her white devils. These dopes crash in the jungle while looking for this girl, because there's a reward for finding her. One of them, a psychotic with a stupid pencil moustache, pulls out a gun and starts shooting. He kills one of the warriors, and is promptly condemned to death. Which he deserves, but that wouldn't further the plot, would it?

Not that much does. There are long, dry conversations and some tepid flirting between the Goddess and the less looney of the two men, although he manages to patronize her like crazy. Actually, she had managed to hold off the tribe doing her in by keeping up the white goddess front for over six years, plus she learned their language and kept a witch doctor at bay. Sounds like a pretty strong, smart girl, which is why Chunky McWhitey's smug condescension is even more annoying.

They finally all run away together, although why they didn't leave the psycho Snidely Whiplash wannabee behind is beyond me. He eventually tries to kill both of them, and gets stabbed by a warrior after he kills yet another of the tribesmen by 'accident'. The two protagonists get in the plane and fly away, and the woman makes dreamy comments about how when she gets back to civilization she immediately wants to buy a hat. A hat!? Gimme a break, lady!