Wheels of Fire

I was watching the great movie Barbarian Queen, when it was over we decided to FFWD to see if there was anything extra on the video. To our surprise we saw the best preview ever, the title.....Wheel of Fire. It was the funniest thing I had ever seen, one of the best parts was when they strapped the main character's sister to the hood of a car, topless. If you're ever bored out of your mind rent Barbarian Queen just the see the end preview

Released by Roger Corman's New Concorde studios, this is a darn good rip-off of "The Road Warrior" from prolific Filipino director Cirio H. Santiago. Producer/director Santiago was known for his exploitation films, starting out in the 70s with a series of Blaxploitation films and then in the 80s focusing on low-budget Vietnam War pictures. Here Santiago takes to the desert areas of the Philippines (I never knew there was such a thing or maybe they were rock quarries) for a Max Max ripoff that tells the story of a nasty post-apocalyptic biker gang names the Highway Warriors who kidnap the sister of our hero who vows to bring her back and take the nasty gang down! It's a super cartoony of science fiction and action film, but Santiago knows his way around an action sequence and his film features more car chases than most of the Max Max knockoff, which is a major asset to the film. It also helps that the costumes and cars more closely resemble those from "The Road Warrior" than most of the low-budget knock-offs. The film also features an early score by Christoper Young ("Entrapment" "Swordfish" "Drag Me to Hell") who at this point in his career was scoring low budget exploitation films this, "Def-Con 4," "Avenging Angel" and "The Dorm That Dripped Blood" before moving onto more prestigious of film work. Despite its no-name cast, this was a pretty enjoyable warriors of the wasteland tale and is recommended for fans of this low-budget subgenera.

Rating Breakdown Story - 0.75 :: Direction - 1.00 :: Pacing - 1.00 :: Performances - 1.25 :: Entertainment - 1.00 TOTAL - 5/10

There is a peculiar joy in the anarchic wreckage of a post-apocalyptic action flick. It is the joy of twisted metal, dust-cloaked antiheroes, and vehicles welded together by madmen. "Wheels of Fire" rolls onto the cinematic wasteland like a scavenged husk of "Mad Max", kicking up dirt but never quite igniting.

The plot is simple. How far will a man go to save his sister? All the way to the end credits, it seems. Our hero, the uninspiringly named "Trace," embarks on a quest to rescue his kidnapped sibling from a gang of wasteland barbarians. Along the way, there are enslaved prisoners, desert mystics, and gunfights shot with the elegance of a bar brawl filmed by a cameraman with heatstroke.

Surprisingly, the film does not shy away from true dystopian depravity. The usual grimy, leather-clad villains twirl their nonexistent mustaches, but here, the depths of human degradation go even lower. This is not thought-provoking cinema, but it commits fully to its vision of societal collapse.

The actors do far more than the script or direction deserve. No one expected Shakespearean gravitas, yet they take their roles seriously, even when spouting dialogue that sounds like it was scribbled on a diner napkin. Their performances prevent the film from sinking entirely into oblivion, though I did find myself reorganizing my bookshelf during some of the slower moments, a damning sign for an action flick.

Cirio H. Santiago's direction is serviceable but uninspired. The genre thrives on striking imagery, lonely highways, blazing sunsets, the sheer emptiness of ruin, but here, the visuals never rise above functional. A better sense of pacing and atmosphere could have elevated "Wheels of Fire" beyond mediocrity.

And that pacing, oh dear. A post-apocalyptic action film should not feel pedestrian. There should be a rhythm of chaos and calm, tension and release. Instead, "Wheels of Fire" idles when it should be revving. The action sequences are a mixed bag, sometimes visceral, sometimes sluggish.

So, is "Wheels of Fire" worth watching? If you relish straight-to-video dystopian destruction, you might enjoy it. If you seek the operatic brilliance of "The Road Warrior," best keep driving. This is a film that could have been more, could have done more, if only it had a little more fuel in the tank. As it stands, it is a curiosity; watchable, occasionally intriguing, but ultimately disposable. The kind of movie you put on when it is raining outside, there is nothing better on television, and you feel like spending an hour and a half in the apocalypse, just not the good apocalypse.

Yet another in the assembly line of low budget "Mad Max" / "Road Warrior" ripoffs actually isn't bad at all, even if it IS derivative. Give credit to the extremely prolific producer & director Cirio H. Santiago: he takes the script by Frederick Bailey and just hits the ground running. He offers very little in the way of let-up, and plenty of action. Our hero could have used a touch more charisma, but he's passable, and the bad guys are such loathsome scum that it's satisfying to watch them come to their ends.

Gary Watkins ("The Long Riders", "Johnny Dangerously") stars as "Trace", a lone wolf in a post- apocalypse future. His kid sister Arlie (Playboy Playmate Lynda Wiesmeier) ends up abducted by the villainous Highway Warriors led by a power crazed goon appropriately named "Scourge" (Joe Mari Avellana, a familiar name to you if you've watched enough Filipino exploitation). With the help of a killer named "Stinger" (Laura Banks) and a young clairvoyant girl named "Spike" (Linda Grovenor), he takes on the scores of minions that come his way.

"Wheels of Fire" is going to be too nasty and hard-edged for some tastes. It will never be mistaken for a feminist statement. But those of you who love a bit of sleaze to go with your brainless futuristic thrills should be more than satisfied. Wiesmeier is made to go topless a great deal of the time, and at one point is tied spread eagle across the hood of a car. There's no excessive gore to concern more squeamish viewers, but that DOESN'T mean that this isn't still plenty violent. For example, Trace has a flamethrower mounted on his vehicle and he just LOVES to set guys on fire.

Performances are all perfectly suited to the material. They won't win Oscars, but who cares? Watkins is okay, and the ladies look just fine. Fortunately, both Banks and Grovenor get to be fairly heroic themselves and handle themselves capably in fight scenes. Avellana is a decent villain, Joseph Zucchero is amusing as a dude named "Whiz", and Jack S. Daniels is a hoot as a wretched piece of excrement named "Scag".

Acceptable genre entertainment gets its biggest boost from the rousing, full orchestral score by the talented Christopher Young ("Hellraiser").

Seven out of 10.

Hideous rip-off of the "Road Warrior" genre -- low-budget and low-brow, the worst of the worst. It might be sort of amusing in that MST3K way, with goofy scenes that recall "R is for Rocket" and the Morlocks, except that the whole thing is so disturbingly misogynistic. If you decide to rent this, don't tell anyone whose respect you want that you're doing it.