Con l'acqua alla gola

In contrast to the alternative title of this movie (Swept Away) I was definitely not swept away by what was a pretty lame excuse for a movie. Really, the only spark (for me) was the highly attractive Camilla More: she's a real stunner. The acting, overall, was useless. The film editing was awful (as rightly pointed out by an earlier reviewer). What more can I say ? Try to avoid this one if you have any choice in the matter.

Really enjoyed the atmosphere, plot and beautiful women.

Teflon tough ex-Navy Seal Mick (Roddy Piper) soon finds himself under siege, piloting a sleek schooner for a no less luxurious-looking drug baron's wife Nola (Tawny Kitaen). It is not long before his sinewy special skills are needfully called upon as Mick lands himself in increasingly stormy waters! This entirely watchable, sex-singed 90s seafaring actioner is vastly improved by the amiable, aesthetically pleasing presence of Roddy Piper and wanton Whitesnake temptress Kitaen, as the oft waterlogged plot is ably revivified by these charismatic actors. B-Movie Adonis Miles O'Keefe also appears as single-minded a D. E. A hardass desperate to arrest ruthless drug trafficker Juan (Juan Fernandez). 'Dead Tides' is more of a salty Zalman King flesh-fantasy than relentless PM Entertainment bullet-fest, since lusty captain Mick mostly relies upon his harpoon than his trusty Roscoe! Successful ladies man Mick gets oar than he bargained for once he climbs aboard the more than ship shape seductress Nola in Serge Rodnunsky's pleasingly saucy shoot 'em up 'Dead Tides'.

I'm not kidding. This movie is the worst movie ever. E-V-E-R. I'm not saying don't watch it, because if you stumble upon it on late night cable, you will not be able to stop yourself. It's like a train wreck or an automobile accident. You know you shouldn't look, you know you don't want to look, that the horror is so terrible as to be unspeakable. And yet, there you find yourself, looking, gazing, staring, in wide-eyed amazement, that something this putrid, that something so horrible in every aspect, could make it into distribution in any form. Simply unbelievable.

I admire Piper for trying something different than the usual action movies he appears in. Here he plays a more normal character who tries to avoid violence and confrontations. However, this movie is so weak in the storyline and execution, I was finally pleased when Piper started bashing heads together. Also, movie has some of the WORST editing techniques I have ever seen in a movie, with jiggily camerawork adding to the chore of looking at what's onscreen, despite some pretty photography.