A year or two ago I was channel-flipping late at night when, on channel 10, I stumbled across a static shot of people sleeping in a large, dimly-lit, dormitory. I lingered briefly, waiting to see which movie this rather dull establishing scene was from, but the shot just went on and on and on, with only the camera angle occasionally varying. Suddenly I realised that someone was pulling a prank, and clearly the prankster (God knows how he did it) was either overriding the channels normal transmission, or more likely, had snuck his way into the studio and was substituting this prank video for the normal program. I started laughing, and sat entranced by this brilliantly outrageous stunt, wondering when the station supervisors would notice this ratings-destroying prank, and envisioned the newspaper headlines the next day such as "Student Jams TV Station". Then after several minutes of this Warholian drivel, the station unexpectedly flipped to a commercial break. I figured that the station had discovered the prank. I was eagerly awaiting the apology for technical difficulties. Instead, after the break, the static dorm shot resumed, and I learned that this supposed student prank was actually the high-rating (!) program "Big Brother". This soul-destroying tedium WAS the program. You couldn't make up something like this. Given that this was late night filler, I checked out the prime time version with only the "highlights" included. It was just as excruciating, yet it rates well. This raises a terrifying question - just who are you freaks? What is the appeal of watching extremely ordinary people of no particular talent, accomplishment or attractiveness (indeed most are downright ugly) sitting around a lounge for hours doing precisely nothing except perhaps spouting inanities? I have read about retards who sit entranced happily playing with string for hours on end, or heroin addicts staring at their shoes all day, but watching this program is about ten levels beneath that. Lord help us.
