Postal

This is Uwe Boll's best film to date. That being said, it's still crap. Abundant plot holes, crudely forced shock tactics, a shallow attempt at satire, and the worst director in the entire world are just the tip of the iceberg on why this movie blows. I hate Boll's work. I hate his belligerence. He should not be allowed near a camera.

The ultimate question, however, is did I laugh? Yes. In spite of everything , I laughed. This movie is Uwe Boll's "F*^# you!" statement to the world. He's going to continue making movies whether we like it or not, and he's actually a lot better at crude humor than any sort of horror, adaptation or whatever random dung heap genre he sticks his nose into. He even makes fun of himself in this movie during a cameo between him and the actual creator of the postal franchise. For some weird reason, I respect that.

Zack Ward was fantastic, and really should be getting better work. This may be a rare time when an actors participation in a Boll film didn't herald their imminent career death. He proved himself to be an adequate action actor, and I'm hoping this gets him some publicity. The same cannot be said for Verne Troyer or Dave Foley, who are circling the drain. (I still laughed though.)

Is it worth the price of admission? Nope, but it's so much closer than any of Boll's films have ever been. Boll may be a deluded, stubborn and angry man,(at the Q&A he explained to us in a very serious tone, how postal was a gutsy, intelligent satire) and his work may be awful, but Boll genuinely loves films and wants to make them. He wants to get better and who knows? Maybe one day Boll will produce something worthwhile. Tasteless director John Waters invented Hairspray, which was thought to be impossible. Maybe Boll will one day harness his ambition towards film-making in a productive way. Or not. Who cares?

You shouldn't see postal if you have an option, but if you don't, you might giggle a few times, in spite of yourself. However, if you're a moron, you'll love it!

-Max

P.S: Boll has always clashed with wheelchair-bound "AintItCool" news leader, Harry Knowles. They don't get along at all. Why do I reference this? There is a mentally challenged character in the movie who begs for money from the seat of a motorized wheelchair. Can you guess his first name?

While Uwe Boll has garnered a reputation as one of the worst directors of all time, I can only surmise that those particular critics either have a very limited awareness of cinema (and clearly have not seen any films by Ulli Lommel...or Eli Roth), or are so embittered by their profession that they cannot see the insane, driven vision beneath the surface of the German mastermind's work. Those who have followed his career with masochistic pleasure have concluded that his current works have shown a legitimate upgrade in quality, and "Postal" is one of his most impressive films; while yet another loose take on a video game, Boll's proficiency with narrative structure (he co-wrote the script with Bryan C. Knight) has gotten better, as has his scene composition (few out-of-nowhere edits away from the action); and placed on the grounds of an absurd satire (a genre that many filmmakers bungle), Boll shows unfettered confidence and drive, even if the end result comes up short. Ditching the nauseating sitcom-structure that has turned Judd Apatow's films into crudely saccharine cinematic gold-mines, Boll goes for the subversive, anti-commercial jugular with "Postal"--he seems on a mission to top one offensive gag with one even more offensive, and the film (true to its title) is an onslaught of un-PC humor from start to finish. While I will say I laughed often at "Postal" and its politics (which echo the anti-consumerist diatribes that made "Fight Club" a cult classic), the comic timing is probably only spot-on about half the time; the remainder of the film's humor flows out of the absurdity of its premise: Dude (Zack Ward, the red-haired bully from "A Christmas Story") is an unemployed, lower-class guy having a bad day--in a pinch for cash, he and Uncle Dave (Dave Foley) concoct a plan to steal a shipment of Krotchy dolls from a Nazi-themed amusement park (run by Boll himself in a hilarious cameo); meanwhile, Osama bin Laden and the Taliban (camped out in the back of a convenience store, natch) are also converging on the coveted toy. Yet the plot is really just an excuse for Boll to let loose with a skewering of stereotypes, history, and blue-collar madness: while "Postal" could have merely been tasteless and humorless, its own sensitivity toward mankind's collectively repressed id shows a greater existential curiosity toward our "post-9/11" society than any Oscar-nominated tearjerker to come down the pike.

Disclaimer: Let me start by saying that I was neither drunk nor high when I watched this movie. I watched it stone cold sober, alone, in my living room.

Amazingly I just gave an Uwe Boll film 8 stars, I know, I can't believe it myself. If I were twelve years old and still read MAD Magazine I'd probably have given it ten stars.

There are plenty of "zany" pop culture riffing movies out there, (Meet the Spartans, Super Hero Movie, Date Movie, etc.) but the difference here is Postal works. I laughed throughout the entire movie, with the exception of about seven jokes which didn't make sense or just didn't work. But it doesn't matter that these seven jokes failed because the movie is an endless stream of jokes, sight gags, bikini clad cult members, machine gun battles, and bad taste in the vein of John Waters/Troma Films earliest efforts.

It's too bad Uwe Boll got himself involved in a petty internet pi**ing contest over this film. I think had he just been modest, kept his mouth shut, and let the film speak for itself it may have been a minor success. The old Hollywood saying about there being "no such thing as bad publicity" doesn't work for you when all you get is BAD PUBLICITY.

That said, the only real problems with the film are the low budget production values and a few of the minor performances, but even those problems just add to the humor of this film.

The plot actually made sense.

The actors played it straight without being too zany too often.

And the jokes, although in bad taste and definitely not for everybody, were never so mean spirited that I was turned off by them.

I think Uwe Boll knew what he was doing with this picture. The satire and parodies worked well, and there were even a few jokes that made me want to cheer. I know, crazy huh?

If Postal had the endorsement of Trey Parker and Matt Stone (and believe you me, this is right up their alley), Postal might have had a better chance at the box office... or maybe not. Maybe a super-crazy hard-R rated comedy on everything from the Taliban to Dr. Uwe Boll himself wouldn't make much money on a quiet weekend much less the comparable one to Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. It's actually kind of a shame, but then again its super low-end cult status could do nothing but help its chances on DVD... But yet, then again, why should I be defending a damn Uwe Boll movie? The man is simply notorious in his realm of bad movie-making, a financially successful Edward D Wood who has (by reputation) a horrible track record of wretched video-game adaptations like House of the Dead and Alone in the Dark. I've seen neither of these, but just seeing a handful of clips of the latter of those two is enough to make one run for the hills.

So why then? Simple - I agree with the Osama Bin Laden character from the movie as quoted from the trailer, he made a funny film. It's also from a video game, but perhaps the nature of the game itself helped things: it's about a guy, named just Dude (Zack Ward) who is having a very bad day, such as a bad job interview, a bad (though cheerfully violent) experience at the unemployment office, and his fat wife is screwing another man. He finally decides to go to his sleazy Uncle Dave (Dave Foley) who is going after a scheme to get him out of an income-tax problem with by selling crotch dolls (?) that also the Taliban/Al-Quaeda is looking to use to spread Bird-flu everywhere in America. And, as they saw, wackiness ensues... by that I mean varying degrees of insanity and stupidity.

It may be varying on the taste of the viewer: some may find this to be the funniest, trashiest piece of satire of last year, and some... will want to kick it down a flight of stairs. I'm somewhere in the middle. It's hard to deny that in Postal - even when Uwe Boll is acknowledging with a full face of "alright then, alright" that he makes crappy video game movies and pokes 'fun' at himself by appearing in a cameo as the guy behind theme park "Little Germany" where he reveals the 'rumor' of his films being funded by Nazi gold are true (!) - there's some stupid and immature s*** floating around. In fact, a good 40% of the movie is just what it aims to be making fun of, which is fecal-related jokes and gruesomely violent shootouts and maiming. But that other 60% reveals a filmmaker who actually has a decent control of his style (not like Alone in the Dark thank heavens), and has some clever ideas up his sleeve.

Indeed the opening scene of the film, where the Taliban is flying a plane and getting ready to crash into a building and the two pilots have an argument about whether or not there will be enough virgins when they get to heaven (if any at all), is truly hilarious dialog not unlike a Kevin Smith movie. And when we see some of the more creative ways Boll takes to letting his actors chew the scenery (Foley's assistant, who takes his apocalypse theory way too seriously, is one of them), it really rocks. Maybe it's a guilty pleasure. Maybe it's just as smart/dumb as it appears to be. And maybe it will be too-offensive or too obvious for the viewer expecting a Bin Laden/Bush joke ending with the line "I wish I knew how to quit you". But, almost sad to say, it mostly works. Dr. Boll, if only for once, good job.

After being laid off from his factory job, getting snubbed at the welfare office, and witnessing his bedridden wife cheating on him with his next door neighbour, the once mild-mannered Postal Dude (Zack Ward) visits his Uncle Dave (Dave Foley) to take part in a plan which entails stealing and re-selling loads of items from the hot new toy craze of Krotchy dolls. Little do they know, that a small group of Taliban members is also planning the same heist at the same time.

Could it be? Uwe Boll finally pulls through with a great video game adaption? Well. . . no. But, he did finally manage to make a good and entertaining one! Say what you will about Boll and his complete lack of artistic talent (and I'll agree with it), but he does know how to stir up some controversy. Whether it's threatening Michael Bay, boxing critics, or making an extremely offensive and perverse new comedy, Uwe can cause problems. Now, obviously, as it's an Uwe Boll film, you're going to have to expect many of the negative elements that go with it: poor acting/writing/etc. However, as the film is so obviously meant to simply offend at any cost, it's not hard to overlook a lot of the flaws and just sit back and laugh at the stupidly ridiculous spectacle that is Postal. I mean, Uwe Boll actually stands onstage in his own film, playing himself, and says all of his movies are funded using Nazi gold and that children in the crowd arouse him. At least he's finally be honest, ya know? Anyway, if Tom Cruise, 9/11, cults, crap, trailers, racism, swearing, Dave Foley, police brutality, fat people, hicks, the handicapped, and over-the-top violence (often against children) sound like things worthy of a laugh, then you'll probably love this. If you're easily offended or reserve your giggles for a more sophisticated type of humour, then just keep on walking because this film is not for you.

Final verdict: 6/10.

-AP3-