San Valentino di sangue

Pretty run of the mill slasher film but one thing it really has going for it that a lot of horror movies don't is that its not as predictable as you might expect it to be and I feel like that kind of plays a big part in why I personally enjoyed it. Cool but cheesy 3D effects, interesting plot. However I will admit one thing I feel like might be a deal breaker for some people is that if you don't like supernatural and have seen the show before, this movie might not be for you. Jensen's character acts a lot like Dean and the whole movie's plot is basically a giant supernatural episode, which if you're like me and like the show you'll definitely like the movie but if you don't this movie might be a turn off.

My Bloody Valentine 3-D (2009)

*** (out of 4)

Remake of the 1981 slasher has a maniac minor killing twenty-two people but ten years later more bodies start to pile up. Is it a copycat killer or has the original come back for more revenge? I'll start off by saying that I'm not a big fan of the original and I'll go even further by saying this one here, story wise, isn't that good. It's more like a two-and-a-half star movie thanks to its throwback to the 80's slashers but the 3-D effects are what really makes it worth seeing. The story has some logical issues to say the least and this includes the identity of the killer, which is pretty impossible considering what you've seen throughout the film. With that said, the movie certainly goes all out in terms of violence and gore. I was pleasantly shocked at how gory this thing was as we get all sorts of graphic killings ranging from picks through the eyes, necks, heads, decapitations and much much more. The red stuff is constantly flowing so I'm sure gore hands are going to be very happy. The film also goes back a few decades in terms of nudity because there's some full frontal female nudity, which we haven't seen in a horror film in a very long time. It seems a lot of slashers today play it safe but that's certainly not the case here. The film goes all out and that includes the 3-D effects. The "Real3D" process is certainly the greatest I've seen and I'm sure others will be very impressed. There are a couple classic scenes with various objects floating at you with one of the best early on when the killer throws his weapon towards the camera. Thankfully the director knew these effects would be the main draw here and he constantly keeps the stuff coming at the screen. Unlike many 3-D movies there's nothing here done for comic relief as the film uses the effects to show off the gore and violence. We get some smaller stuff like one character spitting at the camera but for the most part it's murder and mayhem. The performances are what you'd expect from a film like this but it was great fun seeing Tom Atkins in the cast. Many horror buffs will know him from films like Halloween 3 but it's nice to see him here. In the end, the film certainly doesn't stand out as a classic but you know what to expect when you walk into this. The movie isn't a total success but there are certain things horror and 3-D fans want and this film delivers them.

An interesting new take on the classic 80's slasher, My Bloody Valentine 3D isn't quite as charming or atmospheric as the original, but it does prove to be a decently enjoyable little horror flick. As someone who recently watched the original and was a fan of it, I think this was a solid enough remake. It has its duller moments here and there, and the characters are not particularly interesting for the most part- but it does have some fun gruesome kills and it's fun to see where the mystery takes us. The plot twist in this film is done far better than in the original, and I was rather delighted with it- as the true highlight of the film. It doesn't have the same sort of atmosphere or charm the original had, and feels a bit formulaic at times, but it does serve some similar key elements which are interesting to watch nevertheless. The costume of the miner is really well done, and I thoroughly enjoyed the beginning and end of this film. It may not be perfect, but in the end, My Bloody Valentine 3D is a solid horror efort. It may not stand on as well as the original, but it does prove to be a solidly fun horror mystery with plenty of gore and surprises to satisfy fans.

My Rating: 6.9/10.

My Bloody Valentine 3D is one of those really rare kinds of horror flicks. It delivers buckets of gore, brisk pacing, and a lot of in your face 3D goodness. Sit close to the front of your theater for the maximum effect (if you dare!). There is brutality in king size portions, sure to satisfy the most hardcore of horror fans. They really pull out all the stops with that pickaxe's of his.

Perhaps most importantly though, the production and marketing teams were aware of what it what it was. At its core, its a cheesy mindless slasher film, and rather than try to overcome this, My Bloody Valentine acknowledges this trait and works with it. It owns it. Internet ads bore slogans such as 'Its actually 4D if you're wasted.' Never does it get bogged down trying to patch together an airtight story. It just keeps its unrelenting pace up from start to finish, and delivers what the audience came out to see, gratuitous violence.

A film like this is quite refreshing for the genre, not because it is artful by any means, but because it embraces its inherent trashiness. By deliberately failing to take itself seriously, My Bloody Valentine becomes something more than the majority of its peers can ever be. It becomes fun in the same way that a Poison concert or monster truck rally is fun. Take my advice and see this thing as it was meant to be seen, through beer goggles and a pair of cheap 3D glasses. Enjoy it for what it is and don't worry about the second thoughts you might have tomorrow morning.

A movie titled My Bloody Valentine is clearly non trying to pander to art house crowds, nor does it even seem to be reaching for a higher ilk in the horror genre, but while appearing as a fully tacky horror movie entry (a 3-D remake) My Bloody Valentine succeeds in avoiding and ultimately reviving the never ending pitfalls of such films; a strong, unique opening and a surprising and completely plausible, non-ridiculous finale.

Unfortunately the movie is not as strong as its bookend acts, but it is certainly gory, fun, terrifying, tense and nothing but entertaining. (And yes, there is also nudity). The use of the trademark, in your face, 3-D tactics is mostly restrained, although it seems that director Patrick Lussier (who has mostly been in horror movie limbo since he directed Dracula 2000) could not avoid the intermittent pickaxe to the screen. The performances are actually quite strong, and while this is becoming more the norm in horror films, MBV even forgoes the smart-alecky, prankster character which removes the propensity for us to be taken out of the film.

The unique opening is actually a three-tier start. Flashing newsreels reveal that the collapse of the Hanniger Mine in a small town which claimed the lives of 6 miners (Or was it something else that killed the men?). Awakening from a comma years later, the sole survivor of the cave-in, Harry Warden, picks up where he left off, slaying dozens before being killed himself concluding what the town dubbed the Valentines Day Massacre. But all is not what it seems, as 10 years later Tom Hanniger (Jensen Ackles), a near-victim of Warden, returns to the small town to sell the mine but the killings suspiciously begin once again and it is up to Tom to clear his name.

My Bloody Valentine is a full-fledged throwback to the golden age of slasher films, like Friday the 13th (and is ironically better then the Friday remake this year) and never for a single second tries to be anything it's not and in doing so, it ultimately becomes something it shouldn't be; fun.

6.5 / 10.0

Read all my reviews at: simonsaysmovies.blogspot.com