Plot
A recent college graduate and her estranged high school friends return to Lantern's Lane, the location of an evil urban legend and must fight to survive the night.
Cast
Not familiar with anyone involved.
Verdict
I grew up with slashers, I remember the days they were the biggest sub-genre within horror but they were gradually phased out as the popularity waned and I'd imagine that happened because they became predictable, uninspired and they saturated the industry too much.
You'd think for this reason they'd hold a place in my heart but truth be told though a horror fanatic, slashers are one of the weakest sub-genres for me.
For this reason I went into Lantern's Lane assuming the worst, though I did like the killers mask here.
It's everything you expect when going into a slasher, the tropes, the cliches, but oddly not the kills. You see the character roster is low therefore picking them off one by one was never really on the cards and this slasher essential finds itself lacking. How can a slasher lack kills? It makes up for it in other areas right? A thinking mans slasher perhaps? Nope, it's a bog standard unoriginal one that just doesn't offer one of the few things such a movie absolutely positively needs.
Lanterns Lane is lazy, lacks the basics and brings nothing to the table.
Rants
You know I despise the Scream series, okay fine the first was watchable but they went down a predictable uninspired generic route double quick and I lost interest. Then the modern ones with Ortega came out and I disliked them for a different reason, the lack of believability to comedic levels. What I mean by that is that being a stabbed seems to be more of an inconvenience than a threat to life. You will see characters get stabbed repeatedly, the blade pulled up through the persons flesh as if they're being disemboweled and they manage to flee and are seen later simply with a bandage on. The last movie especially was laughable to next level degrees, even the one character near the end who got stabbed easily two dozen times by both killers simultaneously was on a gurney moments later laughing, joking and kissing his girl!
The Good
Killer looked okay
The Bad
Predictable stuff
Very bland
Simply not enough kills/horror.
