Zombie Women of Satan

"Zombie Women of Satan" is a funny movie, though it is no "Shaun of the Dead".

Now, "Zombie Women of Satan" might not be suitable for everyone, because there is a lot of nudity in the movie, there is a lot of foul, harsh language being used, and there is a scene of necrophilia! That being said, viewer discretion is advised here!

The story in the movie is fairly simple, a group of carnival burlesque performers travel to a remote cabin for an interview for an Internet site. However, unknown to them there is a cult of sort going on here, and a scientist is conducting experimental research on the women. This results in a chemical accident that cause an outbreak of women becoming zombies.

"Zombie Women of Satan" have a good array of odd characters, and they are each so unique and outrageous that they just work out well. There is something bizarre to see a perverted clown running around killing zombies. And the dialogue between the odd characters was funny as well, despite the amount of obscenities and foul language being used.

Personally, I found the excessive showcase of nudity to be a bit too much. It was too tacky, and the movie would have been much better without every single scene having breasts in them.

Having seen this movie now, I can cross it off the zombie movie list. Despite it having hilarious characters and off-beat dialogue, the movie was just too much weighed down by the nudity everywhere, and for that I will not be making a second return to watch this movie again; so it will be put on the DVD shelf to collect dust.

If you like this genre of zombie movies, you are perhaps better off watching "Doghouse".

... and can I just apologise to the world for anyone who unluckily stumbled across this 'film'! I would like to apologise on behalf of Newcastle, the North-East of England and just the United Kingdom in general! This film is seriously a waste of your life and time! I hear Warren Speed is making a sequel!!! Well his cast obviously haven't seen the original and realise what damage it will do to their reputations and future 'careers'! The 'humour' in this film is absolutely abysmal... and not a true representation of the North East of England or it's people! The 'scripting', 'directing' and 'acting' in this film is beyond human comprehension... and not a true representation of the North East of England or it's people! Honestly! People around England... and the globe have this idea that Geordies and people from the North East are stupid, immature and hopeless... and people like Warren Speed and his cast of ridiculous half-wits really don't help! Please! If you have spare money and are tempted to rent or buy this utter shambolic atrocity!!! PleaseE!!! Reconsider and give it to a homeless person, or a charity... or just rent/buy a film that won't make you feel like humanity is not worth saving! Warren Speed aka Pervo The Talentless Clown... you really are a disgrace to art and everything else and should be wholeheartedly ashamed of yourself!

The quick version goes like this: There are films that are terrible but worth a look for certain reasons, even if only one reason.

These may include;

* Outlandish plot devices

* Nudity

* Over the top action and cheesy effects

* Stupid humour and so-bad-it's-good moments

* Low budget creativity and having a crack.

Zombie Women of Satan uses none of these devices in a way that deserves any credit whatsoever. In fact it uses the Troma hook as its only lure – having a title that practically demands attention even if you know it will be bad.

Only as I just mentioned Zombie Women of Satan is not good-horrible, just horrible horrible.

I am not going to waste my time and yours discussing the various flaws and faults of this film, suffice to say it sucks balls from first minute to last. There wasn't one moment that was even "no-one will believe this" or "Gee that was crazy". Even the nudity was lamentable with fat chicks in granny pants covered in fake blood.

I thought Doghouse was a lazy manipulative barrel scraper of a film.

I refuse to watch The Human Centipede because it is simply a transparent attempt at attention because of the gross out factor, the director even tells everyone the entire plot he is so desperate to be acknowledged for his so-called edginess.

I hated this film for how lazy it was. I watched it a few days ago and can't remember anything without looking at notes. In another week all I will remember is how much I hated this film, that might be the only thing I take away from the experience.

If I reach one person and stop them from watching this steaming turd I have added value to society, if only briefly. This is the worst movie I have watched in 2 years, probably longer.

Final Rating – 0.5 / 10. Even the most cold and calculated attempt at finding notoriety through exploitation and violence should only be attempted by someone who can use a basic calculator. This is so inept that I wouldn't have been surprised if there was a single eye on screen for the duration of the film. The 0.5 score is because the cameraman pointed the camera in the right direction, the loss of the other 9.5 points is because by doing so I had to watch what happened.

When it comes to reviewing and voting on small budget movies, I tend to be more generous with my views than if I was dealing with a big budget movie. After all, a big studio production has the cash to make sure they get everything right but a small production rarely has that privilege. For example, a lot of the violence in this movie happens just out of shot. Weapon impacts are just out of frame and then we see the aftermath. This I don't have a problem with as it's hard to do lots of fake impacts realistically and safely. So putting it just out of view makes sense. But despite all the limitations of the budget it is clear that there is still some other problems with this film. The biggest of which is the comedy. The script does contain some decent jokes and one liners but due to some really bad editing and directing - and in one or two cases, some bad performances - most of the humour is completely butchered. If the joke isn't entirely delivered in one take then the editing room is where the timing can be refined until the humour works. But that clearly hasn't been the case in the making of this film. Instead the editing has tried it's best to squeeze every moment of hilarity out of each even vaguely amusing moment and such an attempt kills the humour dead. Several times while watching this film I could see that a joke would have looked great in the script but due to the performances and post production work, the joke just doesn't work on film. But to the fair to the editor and directors, some of the jokes in this film are also ruined by bad performances. There is at least one major cast member who gives a performance worthy of a school nativity play and at least one other who comes close. Which is a shame because some of the other actors and actresses are really good. They've just been let down by some of their cast mates and poor post production work.

If you're looking for a funny comedy, don't see this film. If you're looking for violence, don't see this film. If you're looking for gore or are interested in how *not* to edit humour or like films where afterwards you can say "damn, if they'd had a bigger budget...", then see this film.

truly wretched experience. Please shoot them if any British producer suggest another laddish horror comedy. The low point of many was an inordinately extended shot of a dwarfs face as he took a s**t. and the soundtrack contained every toilet noise they could think of. Not even a punchline except a view of a pile of crap (a metaphor there. There was also a section which seemed to suggest rape was a subject of humour as one of the characters has sex with a zombie strapped to an operating table. Easily the worst film I have seen in a decade. I know these people are mostly amateur but there is no excuse for this sort of thing. Why are women in underwear being hit round the head a lot funny? Why cant they say anything but "fookin"? I could go on but I want to forget the experience rather than recall it in detail.

Since I wrote this other comments have appeared that I can only assume are cast members or their relatives