The Holy Trinity

"The Holy Trinity" is one of those movies made out of pure wish to make a movie rather than wanting to use even a little bit of talent or skill. The acting is laughable, the plot barely exists, the characters are stupid, and the whole thing is so laughably bad that you should definitely consider watching this with your best friend to make fun of it. The movie tries to escape those facts by labeling itself as a dark comedy, but I seriously doubt that's the case. The more likely scenario is that they couldn't make anything better. I am being serious here. I've watched some bad stuff, and this really made me question myself and why I waste my time on stuff like this. Shalom Kolontarov is especially bad; he has one facial expression for every mood and situation. The others are at least trying, although their overacting is obnoxious, and his brother Yakov is barely better. Also, any chance they can have a scene making out with the girls? Those guys grab it! The good parts? Girls are kind of hot, Rebecca Hurt especially. There are also some scenes that feel like they are taken directly out of some other movies, and they stick out terribly with their higher quality. But other than that, watching this is the same as if you decided to delete an hour and a half of your existence. Absolutely the same result. I give it 2/10, and I don't recommend it unless you are deliberately going to make fun of it, because that's the only thing it's good for.

"The Holy Trinity" is an unrelenting descent into darkness that will haunt your very soul. Shalom Kolontarov's nightmarish creation unleashes a torrent of unspeakable horrors, defying all notions of salvation. As the film weaves its wicked tapestry, the veil between worlds is torn asunder, releasing ancient malevolence upon unsuspecting victims. The demonic presence lurking in every frame will seep into your nightmares, its sinister whispers echoing in your mind long after the credits roll. Prepare for a chilling journey through twisted corridors of faith and madness, where the unholy trinity reigns supreme, and redemption becomes a distant, unattainable dream.

Current rating: 9.6. Probably this is the most funny part of this movie, and indeed I started watching it because of the clearly fake rating.

The overall result of the making of it is so embarassing that it is not even funny: it will manage to let you laugh a couple of times but certainly not to scare you, if not for the terrible audio taking and mixing which will make you deaf in some minutes.

Prime Video is an unesaurible source of this kind of movies but this is probably the lowest effort ever made by human kind, also taking in count its release date, and I somehow feel proud of being part of the small elite of people who managed to watch it.

On to the next!

Review: The Holy Trinity (2023)

Shalom Kolontarov's The Holy Trinity is a gripping supernatural horror film that delivers a spine-chilling experience filled with suspense, folklore, and psychological terror. Inspired by true events, the film takes viewers on a terrifying journey as a group of college friends unknowingly awaken an ancient pagan demon during a weekend getaway.

What stands out the most about The Holy Trinity is its eerie atmosphere. From the moment the group arrives at the secluded cabin, a sense of unease lingers in every frame. Kolontarov skillfully builds tension through unsettling cinematography, haunting music, and a slow-burning dread that keeps the audience on edge.

The cast delivers solid performances, bringing authenticity to their roles. The fear, paranoia, and desperation of the characters feel real, making it easy for the audience to connect with their plight. Shalom Kolontarov, Val Garrahan, and Yakov Kolontarov give standout performances, elevating the horror experience with raw emotions and believable chemistry.

The film's use of supernatural elements is both terrifying and thought-provoking. Unlike many mainstream horror films that rely heavily on jump scares, The Holy Trinity focuses on atmospheric horror and psychological torment, making it a more immersive and unsettling experience. The incorporation of ancient mythology adds an intriguing layer to the story, keeping viewers engaged from start to finish.

While indie horror films often struggle with production constraints, The Holy Trinity makes the most of its budget, delivering a visually compelling and thematically rich story. The practical effects and eerie sound design further enhance the film's haunting nature, ensuring that it lingers in the minds of horror fans.

Overall, The Holy Trinity is a must-watch for horror enthusiasts who appreciate films that blend supernatural terror with psychological depth. It's an indie gem that proves Shalom Kolontarov is a filmmaker to watch, bringing a fresh and eerie vision to the horror genre. If you're looking for a film that will keep you up at night, The Holy Trinity is well worth your time.

Prepare to be terrified and bewildered by the mind-bending nightmare that is "The Holy Trinity"! Shalom Kolontarov's twisted creation will leave you questioning your sanity and clutching your popcorn in a death-grip. This diabolical masterpiece weaves a web of pure horror, blending religion, science, and sheer madness into a potent cocktail of terror. The spine-chilling narrative plunges you into a world where angels and demons collide, unleashing unimaginable chaos upon unsuspecting souls. With breathtaking cinematography and heart-stopping performances, this unholy trinity of terror will haunt your dreams, leaving you desperate for salvation. Brace yourself, for this cinematic nightmare is not for the faint of heart!