I Am Virgin

Before I review this movie, I have to say that I'm usually not "picky" about movies, and some of my favorite movies had really bad critics, but I still couldn't stand this movie. First a review about the general aspects of the movie. Overall it really looked like a work of amateurs, which would be fine if the other things were good. The acting, saving 2 or 3 actors, was awful and I really mean awful (even the dog was bad). Now about the story and the content. This looked, like it was said here before, just like a soft core pornographic movie. The movie had a lot of those scenes which were too long, repetitive and just lame, not adding anything to the story. Oh and the actresses that were in those scenes were some of the worst actresses ever. Really the movie went like: 5 min about the story - 10 min lesbian-zombie sex scene - 3min story - 10 min zombie orgy.

I never thought a movie could be this bad. Don't watch it unless you want to waste your time.

This is a spoof of I Am Legend with a twist - insatiable lust. The infected just can't get enough sex and Robby, our sweet virgin, is the last man standing who hasn't succumbed to his lustful urges in a post-apocalyptic world. There is definitely nudity and some soft-core scenes, but that's what fast forward is for if you're not into that sort of thing. Adam Davis is convincing as "the virgin" and is actually quite comical. Billy Bob the dog isn't to be outdone! And let's not forget Ron Jeremy as the elder vampire. There were some amazing shots and in a downtown city like Portland it's quite impressive to see how desolate the streets all look. I'm a person who watches and reviews many movies each week, including an immense amount of low budget and independent films. The cinematography is far superior to the great majority of low budget films (even ones with bigger names attached). The other aspect that really impressed me was the sound quality. Nothing is more irritating than having to replay a scene due to poor audio, or just as bad, being able to tell the difference between the original recording on set and the re-recording. Although not all the females in this movie are strippers there are a few (hey, it's what Portland is known for!), but there is a wide variety of sexy, scantily clad women to entice not just Robby, but the other beefy men in this film as well. So if you enjoy a little comedy with your T&A this should be right up your alley!

I enjoyed the plot. Funnier than hell! A bunch of Portland strippers with their bad-ass tattoo work and Ron Jeremy?! What more can you ask for?!!! Great use of an hour of your time.

I expected this to be a comedy, like it was listed on here, but it wasn't funny, entertaining or interesting in any way. The majority of the film is made up of overly long soft core sex scenes. I'm not sure what the writers thought was funny when they were writing it, but there aren't even any jokes in the film. The acting is crap as expected, with the main character monologuing a LOT, if you have an actor who you know is crap, try and make them say as little s possible instead of constantly talking about things that have nothing to do with the scene. Also here are a LOT of pointless scenes in this film, of the main character shopping, playing golf and just driving around, with nothing else happening in those scenes at all. Save yourself the time and either go and watch porn or watch a decent comedy.

Given its very low IMDB rating (currently 1.9) and the lack of total reviews with most being one stars. Had no expectations and watched expected something entirely terrible but mildly amusing.

This film is essentially best enjoyed not to take serious and understand its low budget with amateur actors (apparently this was the lead actor's first film), with actual adult stars.

Still the acting is terrible and unintentionally funny at times, mainly with the lead Robby speaking to himself and his dog. We even get the classic Jaws line (54:02) with him in the adult store holding an adult toy saying "we're gonna need a bigger boat".

The plot is nonexistent with just Robby being the last human wondering around the deserted city of Portland, due to its virus wiping humans out. We see him doing things as shopping, playing golf and of course wander into strip clubs, adult dvd shops and hospitals.

The main hurdle here is given in its title, Robby is a virgin and as he goes from venue he sees these attractive vampire women performing. Of course he's tempted in getting involved as we see him creeping in on each act, but his thought is justified thinking that if he does get involved, the vampires will bite him turning himself into a vampire.

There are lot of goofiness like scenes with him webcaming himself talking about his day, continually complaining about being a virgin and his current situation.

One highlight is a random five minute cameo by beloved Ron Jeremy (1:14:35) as the elder vampire giving our lead advice.

As expected there are about five explicit soft core scenes (apparently these brief scenes were edited and taken from adult soft core Vamp Vixens), and these scene last around 3-5 minutes. Starts early around 9:40, others 34:25, 45:30, 54:25, 1:06:10. With each scene it's edited with glimpses of Robby peeping on the act deciding what to do.

The end sees him going in a daytime strip club (the world known "Lucky Devil") and being confronted by all the vampire women whom he seen previously before with him giving the monologue chronicling back to the opening of the film. He ponders whether he would partake but ultimately decides not to then he leaves.

Then we see him back home on the webcam essentially saying he's saving himself for "the right girl". Movie ends.

Again not a film to be taken serious, and is essentially an unfunny and awkward adult spoof but it's nothing to be upset about watching. Don't expect anything great and you may enjoy the unintentional comical relief.