Dìdi

Greetings again from the darkness. 'Coming of Age' films typically lean heavily into either comedy or tragedy. In his first feature film, writer-director Sean Wang (Oscar nominated for his documentary short NAI NAI & WAI PO, 2023) takes a different approach. While he certainly injects some humor, it's isolation and awkwardness - that feeling of not fitting in - that takes center stage. It's quite possible, even likely, that some of this is autobiographical for director Wang. That's a safe statement since most every teenager can relate to bits of this story.

Chris Wang (played by Izaac Wang) is introduced to us as he's blowing up a neighbor's mailbox. We don't get the full story until later, but it doesn't take long for us to figure out that this kid is trying (too) hard to fit in with his group of buddies, as they each transition from junior high to high school. It's the summer of 2008, and Chris lives with his mother, grandmother, and sister ... and he's miserable and lost.

Mom (a terrific Joan Chen, LUST CAUTION, 2007) is a talented artist, beaten down by the demands of being a single mom to two constantly bickering kids, and a demanding mother-in-law for whom nothing is ever good enough. Nai Nai (Chang Li Hua) is played by director Wang's real-life grandmother, and though her health is slowly fading, she doesn't understand the social or family dynamics of the era. Vivian (Shirley Chen) is the sister/daughter who will be leaving home for college in one month. She is constantly annoyed by her little brother's extreme pranks and immaturity, as well as the unfair judgments of Nai Nai. Their father is working in Taiwan, creating even more stress for these folks in Fresno.

Identity plays a huge role for Chris. His friends have always called him Wang-Wang, and at home he's referred to as Didi (little brother). A group of older skaters offers him his first chance to be "Chris" and 'half-Asian', and he takes it. He wants so much to be part of the big boy club, yet he fails hard when his crush Madi (Mahaela Park) initiates 'the nervous game.' He also flops at being the filmer for the skate kids, and his sister counsels with the age-old warning, "Don't do anything stupid." Of course, we know he will.

Being the summer of 2008, we see camcorders, MySpace, AOL Instant Messenger, A WALK TO REMEMBER, and flip phones, amongst other reminders of the era. It's interesting to see the first group of teens embrace the early days of social media, especially with the amateurish videos that slammed YouTube in those days. In this regard, director Wang has delivered a period piece, even if it's from less than 20 years ago. Google search also plays a starring role.

Most impressive is how the film, and the actors, capture the emotions we all recognize. Anger, confusion, and frustration are prevalent for Chris and his mother, the latter of whom gets a wonderful scene where she relays her perspective on life. It's heart-wrenching and Joan Chen nails it. As Chris, Izaac Wang details the absurd squirrel story which highlights his advanced level of social awkwardness. Included are references to Ang Lee and Spike Jonze, and the emphasis on Chris not being a stereotypical Asian-American. When summer ends, the braces come off, and Chris strolls into high school ... we easily understand why this won an Audience Award at Sundance. The digital version even includes some bonus features ('the making of DIDI').

Now available on digital and coming to Blu-ray on October 29, 2024.

The slogan of this movie is "For anyone who's ever been a teenager," but I have to disagree. A more fitting slogan would be "For any Asian who's ever been a teenager in a Western country." It's classified as a "comedy-drama," but again, I disagree. The marketing makes it seem like they're trying to present Didi as a different kind of movie-maybe to attract a broader audience? Understandable, but ultimately not important. That said, there's no real "comedy" in this film; it's a drama through and through, approached with a calm and measured tone.

Visually, I really enjoyed the film. The aspect ratio and the shallow depth of field make nearly every scene stunningly appealing. The color grading is good, though I think it leans a bit too heavily on yellow tones. I also appreciated the realism of the footage captured by the small domestic camera featured in the film-it shakes naturally in every scene, just as you'd expect. Another detail I loved was Chris's room, especially his desk and computer. The production team did an excellent job of recreating those old-school GUIs, making them both authentic and visually engaging.

Now, onto the heart of this review. I deeply relate to Didi (aka the creator of this movie?) because I was just like him-growing up in nearly the same era. Watching this film stirred up long-forgotten emotions and sensations. The movie captures, with sharp realism, the struggles of adolescence as an Asian teenager in a Western country: the constant embarrassment, the internalized racism, the endless comparisons with other kids, the complexities of foreign family dynamics, the friendships, and the lies.

I don't think this movie will hit you as hard if you haven't lived through these experiences yourself. Throughout the film, I kept thinking, "This movie doesn't need a happy ending. The existence of the movie itself is the happy ending."

Watch it if you want to relive (or live) the traumatic yet formative days of being a non-white teenager during the early years of social media.

Didi nails the essence of the teenage experience, capturing that awkward, in-between phase where we desperately want to fit in but have no idea who we really are. The film beautifully portrays how, during this time, we constantly guess what others expect from us, often making decisions out of fear rather than true choice.

Identity and Fitting In

One of the most memorable moments is when Chris tries to fit in with a group of older kids by asking for a cigarette, even though it's clear he's never smoked before. This scene speaks volumes about teenage insecurity. Chris assumes smoking is what's expected, so he jumps at the chance, only to be surprised when one of the older boys casually declines, saying he doesn't smoke. It's a subtle but powerful example of how, at that age, we're so afraid of being judged that we forget we actually have the freedom to choose.

The Parent-Teen Dynamic

The film also does an excellent job of exploring the relationship between Chris and his mother. At that age, we often push our parents away, trying to create distance to avoid embarrassment. Chris does this constantly, making excuses and trying to seem "cool" in front of his peers. What's funny and relatable is that the older kids don't care at all. In fact, they're more interested in having a genuine conversation with his mom. This contrast highlights how, as we grow older, we realize that the things we were once ashamed of like our parents' presence don't matter as much. The film cleverly uses these interactions to remind us how much we create unnecessary barriers in our youth.

Hiding Your True Self

Another standout moment is when Chris takes down his posters, an act that symbolizes the struggle of hiding your true self. At this age, we often hide our interests and passions because we're afraid they won't be "cool" or accepted. Dìdi touches on this theme in a meaningful way, showing how our fear of standing out can lead us to conceal the very things that make us unique. The film's message is clear: the things we're passionate about are what define us, and embracing them is what helps us grow into our true selves.

The Comparison Trap

Lastly, the film captures the emotional weight of comparison during adolescence. Chris is overwhelmed by feelings of inadequacy he has fewer friends, he doesn't have a girlfriend, and his family isn't like others. These are common struggles that many of us faced growing up. The film conveys how, at that age, everything feels like too much to handle, but as time passes, we begin to find ourselves and accept who we are. The director uses Chris's journey to show that while these feelings are intense, they are also temporary.

Final Thoughts

We've all been there overthinking every little decision, scared to make the wrong move, and hiding parts of ourselves to fit in. Dìdi captures that experience with humor, heart, and a refreshing dose of reality. It's a beautiful reminder that the awkwardness of growing up is what ultimately helps us discover who we truly are.

Watched this at the 2024 Sundance Film Festival.

Sean Wang perfectly captures the drama, cringe comedy of teenage life, and the Asian American culture with tender sweet performances, good camerawork, and fun characters to explore. Wang's direction on the humor aspects, character personalities and writing felt genuine to the setting and many of the themes on culture, friendship, growing up, and reality is well-handled with the maturity of the direction and writing.

There are uses of 2000's internet culture and media that felt strong and interesting and it is clear that Wang understands how internet culture works and how children are able to act. Because many of the child performances are good and Issac Wang is the star stealer of the entire movie, alongside with Joan Chen.

As someone who is Asian American, many of the themes, culture approaches and the characters were emotionally interesting and it felt purposeful and touching. I personally connected with the characters and what Wang was trying to tell. The humor is good as well.

Some small gripes are that I felt some of the lightening could be better in certain nighttime settings and some of the dialogue could be improved. Overall, this could have turned into a cheesy and annoying movie but with Wang's direction and writing, it becomes a thought-provoking yet tender sweet coming of age movie.

You can always tell when scenes about the Asian American experience are included specifically so the non-Asian American audience notices. Like when there's a lingering shot on guests' shoes as they walk through the house, or when there's a pause after a particularly harsh reprimand from an elder. For the Asian American audience, these moments aren't out of the ordinary-and sometimes we look puzzled when we hear other moviegoers laugh or cringe or exclaim a knowing "Oh no, the shoes." But for the non-Asian American audience, these moments are foreign, highlighting the differences between the people on screen and themselves. Even if the family lives in the suburbs and the children are second generation American who speak perfect English.

In that way, the experiences of Didi's protagonist, Chris ("Wang Wang" to his friends and "Didi" to his mother)-the microaggressions directed at him, his shortcomings when reacting to his mother and friends, and even the way he codeswitches his name-are presented to the non-Asian American audience as a way of highlighting the different struggles and paths toward growth in an Asian American's coming-of-age story.

Even though adolescent angst has so many universal elements across all American experiences of it, audiences can relate to the awkwardness and shame and uncertainty portrayed in movies like Boyhood and Eighth Grade-and particularly the desire to fit in at school, with friends, or among family-differently than in Didi. Because there's a uniqueness in the tension of Didi's titular character. It's not just about fitting in to a world that is unrecognizable, one without the freedom and infinite possibilities of childhood imaginings but instead burdened by the rigid structures of socially imposed order, an inherent hierarchy perpetuated by class and culture in inculcated in our youth by media consumption and unspoken mores. There's also a cultural tension in Didi, a desire not to be like your sister or the other Asian American kids, to shirk the stereotypes and be less Asian (and more white). Chris must navigate fitting into an external world that is both his and not his, that is extremely familiar and yet so separate from his world at home-as evidenced by the different names he uses with his mother versus his old friends versus his new friends

By setting the movie in the early 2000s, Didi asks the audience to remember our own fledgling teenage years. And in that reflection, the Asian American audience sees ourselves (thematically, if not specifically) on screen. And the non-Asian American audience is meant to notice the differences, but still relate to the awkwardness and the desire to make friends and lose your virginity and steal from your siblings and yell at your mom. By noticing these differences in a quintessentially American coming-of-age story, the foreign moments become familiar and their own uniquely experienced adolescence becomes a little more universal.