Yes We Spank

This Adult Time VOD is mistitled, probably because the marketers don't bother to check out their content. "Spank" is of course a porn fetish for the BDSM crowd, but this pair of scenes includes one from Bree Mills' Lez Be Bad label that's titled awkwardly "DV Spank-Bank Sex Tape", and via the magic of Google I discovered that spank-bank means storing away images to recall as stimulation later for masturbating. In this context the word spank is from "spanking the monkey", unrelated to corporal punishment.

That scene stars Kenna James in an absurd story premise (courtesy of untalented writer Midnight): she finds a box belonging to her husband that contains lesbian porn magazines and videos. Her absurd reaction is to call up a couple of old college chums, Vicki Chase and Katrina Colt to invite them over for a session of lesbian antics to tape for her horny husband to watch (and evidently masturbate about). This is an all-sex vignette with no dialogue (just Kenna's silly voice-over intro) and gonzo sex including Kenna being double-penetrated by her friends' strap-ons.

The second segment has no spanking either. It's titled "My Pesky Girl Has the Wrong Remote!", and was issued just one month earlier on the VOD titled "Precious Keepsakes".

Lexi Luna gets the opportunity to display her overacting ability in this poorly done "Mommy's Girl" segment, with blame to place on the shoulders of directors Siouxsie Q and Michael Vegas.

Lapis Afterglow's script is NSG for starters, straining credulity, which is then run off the cliff by the helming team. Stepmom is rather mean to her daughter Aften Opal, bossing her around and not wanting to talk at length, for no obvious reason. It turn out she wants to go to her bedroom to masturbate and try out a new toy -an egg shaped vibrator operating by remote control.

Stop me if you've heard this one before: she pops the toy into her pussy and it starts vibrating irregularly. That's because she has the wrong remote; Aften unwittingly has the toy's remote which she keeps punching the keys to try and get the TV in the living room to operate.

Lexi in the nude goes through lots of gyrations to simulate orgasms as the out of control toy stimulates her. Finally she rushes to the living room to switch remotes and then, in an ultra-horny state seduces Aften on the couch for the duration.

So much is wrong with this clunker, for starters: (1) No way that the remotes would resemble each other, given that a TV would have far more buttons; (2) Lexi would have simply removed the toy from her pussy once it was wildly out of control, but she doesn't; (3) Final plot twist is bungled by the directors, as Aften agrees to sex because the TV doesn't work, but no explanation is given why she couldn't get it to work once Lexi gives her the correct remote.