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Movies never to watch.

by HallmarkMovieBuff • Created 11 years ago • Modified 4 weeks ago
Original and Obsolete Purpose: My Private Comments on Movies I've Seen

Rather than writing full reviews (to satisfy IMDb's minimum length requirements), these were comments to remind me of why I gave each movie the rating I did.

Moved previous contents to Check-Ins to continue Original Purpose.

Now: Movies never to watch and why.
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  • 20 titles
  • Invisible Adversaries (1977)

    1. Invisible Adversaries

    19771h 49m
    6.4 (184)
    Anna, an artist, is obsessed with the invasion of alien doubles bent on total destruction. Her schizophrenia is reflected in the juxtapositions of long movie camera takes with violently edited montages: private with public spaces; black & white with colour, still photographs with video, earsplitting sounds with disruptive camera angles. Anna uses her body like a map; after a devastating quarrel with her lover, she paints red stitches on herself. Watching their scenes together, we realize how seldom, if ever before, the details of sexual intimacy have been shown in film from the point of view from a woman. Export privileges rupture over unity and never settles for one-dimensional solutions (Artforum, Nov. 1980)
    DirectorValie ExportStarsSusanne WidlPeter WeibelJosef Plavec
    Scene from Women Make Film 10: (Melodrama) / Sci-Fi / (Horror & Hell). Woman decapitating fauna on kitchen table. [There were very few female-directed films in the Sci-Fi category and the best that were were modern (e.g., Wonder Woman).]
  • The Asthenic Syndrome (1989)

    2. The Asthenic Syndrome

    19892h 33m
    6.5 (1.5K)
    In the old days it was called hypochrondria, or black melancholia. Now, apparently, it's termed the Asthenic Syndrome. Whatever it is, Nikolai, a teacher has got it, and it's not much fun.
    DirectorKira MuratovaStarsSergei PopovOlga AntonovaGalina Zakhurdaeva
    Scene from Women Make Film 10: (Melodrama) / (Sci-Fi) / Horror & Hell. Scene near the end: 9 dogs in poor shape locked in a cage, the first, blind in left eye.
  • Blackboards (2000)

    3. Blackboards

    20001h 28m64Metascore
    6.8 (3K)
    Kurdish teachers Said and Reeboir roam Iranian villages near Iraqi border during war. Said guides displaced men, marries widow Halaleh. Reeboir joins child smugglers. Amid danger, they try teaching nomadic students while soldiers patrol.
    DirectorSamira MakhmalbafStarsSaid MohamadiBehnaz JafariBahman Ghobadi
    Scene from Women Make Film 10: (Melodrama) / (Sci-Fi) / Horror & Hell. Kurdish teachers leading villagers crawling in pain away from their village near the Iraqi border during the Iran-Iraq war trying to avoid a chemical warfare attack.
  • Nothing Bad Can Happen (2013)

    4. Nothing Bad Can Happen

    20131h 50mNot Rated51Metascore
    6.9 (2.4K)
    Inspired by horrifying true events, Nothing Bad Can Happen follows Tore, a young lost soul involved with an underground Christian punk movement who falls in with a dysfunctional family who test his seemingly unwavering faith.
    DirectorKatrin GebbeStarsJulius FeldmeierSascha Alexander GersakAnnika Kuhl
    Scene from Women Make Film 10: (Melodrama) / (Sci-Fi) / Horror & Hell. Two women torturing a Christian male.
  • NabelFabel (1984)

    5. NabelFabel

    19844mShort
    5.9 (77)
    In NavelFable Mara Mattuschka subjects herself to a second birth through endless pairs of tights. Her body struggles so hard and in such a deformed manner from out of the layers of nylon that the sheer struggle for survival becomes visible. (Peter Tscherkassky)
    DirectorMara Mattuschka
    Scene from Women Make Film 10: (Melodrama) / (Sci-Fi) / Horror & Hell. A 4-minute short of a face peeling from asphyxiation in Hell. Mara Mattuschka's 1st of 19 shorts. Probably, don't watch any of them. And avoid certain of her films, too.
  • Essie Davis and Noah Wiseman in The Babadook (2014)

    6. The Babadook

    20141h 34mNot Rated86Metascore
    6.8 (263K)
    A single mother and her child fall into a deep well of paranoia when an eerie children's book titled "Mister Babadook" manifests in their home.
    DirectorJennifer KentStarsEssie DavisNoah WisemanDaniel Henshall
    Scene from Women Make Film 10: (Melodrama) / (Sci-Fi) / Horror & Hell. Psychological horror throughout. Not my kind of film.
  • Riley Keough and Taylour Paige in Zola (2020)

    7. Zola

    20201h 26mR76Metascore
    6.4 (19K)
    A stripper named Zola embarks on a wild road trip to Florida.
    DirectorJanicza BravoStarsTaylour PaigeRiley KeoughNicholas Braun
    Tried to watch but couldn't stand the tawdry atmosphere.
  • Falling in Love Again (2018)

    8. Falling in Love Again

    20181h 15mNot Rated
    5.5 (58)
    Ricky and Tara are a recently divorced couple navigating the challenges of co-parenting their young son while recovering from the wounds of their failed relationship. But after moving on to new partners, they soon find the grass isn't quite greener and they might just want that old thing back. Will they take a second shot at love?
    DirectorsDan GarciaMike MayhallStarsKyanna Mai-Lee BosworthTerrell CarterWhitney Clark
    Watched it and found that it lived up to neither its title nor its rating.
  • Jason Bateman in Teen Wolf Too (1987)

    9. Teen Wolf Too

    19871h 35mPG8Metascore
    3.5 (13K)
    Todd Howard is a struggling college student. Nothing seems to be going very well for him, until he turns into a wolf.
    DirectorChristopher LeitchStarsJason BatemanKim DarbyJohn Astin
    A cheap follow-up to https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0090142/.
  • Christmas by Design

    10. Christmas by Design

    Directors
    Never left development. Perhaps an extraneous entry for https://www.imdb.com/title/tt29392874/.
  • Taryn Manning in Karen (2021)

    11. Karen

    20211h 29mTV-14
    3.2 (3.5K)
    Karen attempts to displace the new Black family that moved into the neighborhood, but they won't back down without a fight.
    DirectorCoke DanielsStarsTaryn ManningCory HardrictJasmine Burke
    Poor rating, and probably responsible for trashing the respectable name of "Karen."
  • Kristy Dawn Dinsmore in Half Sisters (2023)

    12. Half Sisters

    20231h 18m
    3.2 (253)
    Two half-sisters who bitterly hate each other become trapped in a farmhouse during a storm, as a couple of murderous intruders terrorize them from outside as they look for their $1M inheritance check.
    DirectorDevin Fei-Fan TauStarsKristy Dawn DinsmoreSydney WinbushDarielle Mason
    Poor rating.
  • Malum (2023)

    13. Malum

    20231h 32m18+
    5.0 (6.9K)
    A rookie police officer willingly takes the last shift at a newly decommissioned police station in an attempt to uncover the mysterious connection between her father's death and a vicious cult.
    DirectorAnthony DiBlasiStarsJessica SulaCandice CokeChaney Morrow
    Violence, gore, frightening, and intense.
  • Uma Thurman, Tim Roth, Sofía Vergara, and Alice Eve in The Con is On (2018)

    14. The Con is On

    20181h 35mR
    3.8 (9.1K)
    In an effort to avoid paying off a massive gambling debt to a notorious mobster in England, a couple flee to Los Angeles and hatch a jewel theft plot.
    DirectorJames OakleyStarsDot CosgroveUma ThurmanTim Roth
    Name actors but poor rating.
  • The Collective (2023)

    15. The Collective

    20231h 26m
    3.3 (2.3K)
    A young recruit to a mysterious agency of assassins finds himself going rogue on his first assignment, tracking down a dangerous group of human traffickers.
    DirectorTom DeNucciStarsLucas TillRuby RoseDon Johnson
    Poor rating.
  • The Swing of Things (2020)

    16. The Swing of Things

    20201h 33mR
    3.0 (2K)
    A groom-to-be accidentally books his destination wedding and honeymoon at a swingers resort in Jamaica.
    DirectorMatt ShapiraStarsChord OverstreetOlivia CulpoLuke Wilson
    Very low rating + cheap, sophomoric sex.
  • Tom Skerritt, Peter Facinelli, and Jay Pickett in Catch the Bullet (2021)

    17. Catch the Bullet

    20211h 28mR
    3.1 (712)
    Britt MacMaster, a U.S. Marshal who rarely brings them back alive, returns home from the trail to discover his 12-year-old son, Chad has been kidnapped by outlaws Jed Blake and his gang.
    DirectorMichael FeiferStarsJay PickettGattlin GriffithMason McNulty
    Very low rating.
  • Katherine Heigl, Rosario Dawson, and Geoff Stults in Unforgettable (2017)

    18. Unforgettable

    20171h 40mR45Metascore
    5.1 (18K)
    A woman sets out to make life a living hell for her ex-husband's new fiancée.
    DirectorDenise Di NoviStarsRosario DawsonKatherine HeiglGeoff Stults
    Average rating + not a fan of either female star.
  • Vincent Cassel in La haine (1995)

    19. La haine

    19951h 38mNot Rated
    8.1 (215K)
    24 hours in the lives of three young men in the French suburbs the day after a violent riot.
    DirectorMathieu KassovitzStarsVincent CasselHubert KoundéSaïd Taghmaoui
    Highly rated violence.
  • Tre Armstrong in How She Move (2007)

    20. How She Move

    20071h 34mPG-1363Metascore
    3.6 (6.8K)
    Following her sister's death from drug addiction, a high school student is forced to leave her private school to return to her old, crime-filled neighborhood where she re-kindles an unlikely passion for the competitive world of step dancing.
    DirectorIan Iqbal RashidStarsRutina WesleyTre ArmstrongBrennan Gademans

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