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The worst movies I've watched

by guisreis • Created 11 years ago • Modified 5 months ago
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  • 225 titles
  • Breaking Wind (2012)

    1. Breaking Wind

    20121h 22mR
    2.3 (5.2K)
    A comedic spoof based on the worldwide phenomenon "The Twilight Saga."
    DirectorCraig MossStarsHeather Ann DavisEric CalleroFrank Pacheco
  • Orgulho de Ser Brasileiro (2013)

    2. Orgulho de Ser Brasileiro

    20131h 29m
    4.7 (20)
    'Pride of being Brazilian' is a documentary that discusses this emblematic feeling that you hear in Brazil. The plot in based on a director's personal search for the feeling to be pride of being Brazilian. The film explores a new concept about the feeling of pride in Brazil with different angles of cinematography and perspectives of the personalities interviewed. Plus the Brazilian National Anthem is filmed in a singular and provocative interpretation, much more than the original version, and the documentary goes beyond about the Brazilian exaggerated self-description that 'Brazilians are the best people in the world'. It's a film just to discuss the Brazilian sense of self-nationalism. But it is pro. Not against Brazil. Just real. Made by Brazilians with no foreign interference.
    DirectorAdalberto PiottoStarsBadi AssadD. Angélico Sândalo BernardinhoCarlos Borges
    Review: This awful documentary is unbelievable. It is, for sure, one of the worst movies I have ever watched. It is astounding how the producer and director (an anchorman of conservative radio programs) dared to select a so biased group of interviewees to explain Brazil, some of them clearly unable to produce a complex analysis - from politicians such as ex president Cardoso (who abandoned his past reputation as an important sociologist to become a rancorous newspaper commentator) and presidential candidate Marina Silva (as Cardoso, she is also a fierce opponent of the governments which had been ruling the country for a decade) to irrelevant upper-class Brazilians living in the United States (curiously, perhaps aware of their controversial participation, the synopsis in the official website describes the film as "Just real. Made by Brazilians. With no foreign interference."). No social movements, no progressive intellectuals, no slum or countryside people appear on screen. The outcome is obviously elitist, right-wing, bitter to then Federal Government, with almost only unsophisticated testimonies. The elegant rooms where most of the interviews happened are a metaphor of how far from Brazilian people this movie is. If you want to know more about Brazil, its complexities, what was going on there by the end of the first decade of XXIst century, I strongly recommend you to look anywhere else.
  • As Taradas Atacam (1978)

    3. As Taradas Atacam

    19781h 20m
    4.2 (45)
    The narrator of a radio show called "Barulho na Cidade" (Noise in the City) tells five erotic episodes: *******Episode 1: "Sexo Diferente" (Unusual Sex): Malu writes a letter to the show, telling that her little husband Sérgio is no longer sexually interested on her, and requested she finds a lover to "heat" their marriage. ********Episode 2: "Rapto do Ônibus" (Kidnapping the Bus): while robbing the passengers of a bus, a thief has a big surprise. *******Episode 3: "Como Vai o Seu Peru?" (How is your Turkey? - obs: in Portuguese, a "dick" is called "piru", therefore there is a low-level joke with the words): The cuckold Nenem is married with unfaithful Terezinha, who cheats him with many men. His neighbor Zeca, who is married with Mariazinha, tries to have an affair with Terezinha. ********Episode 4: "Sonhos Que Matam" (Dreams That Kill): Aristides and Aristeu are vagabonds and best friends. When Aristides finds the picture of a beautiful girl, he dreams on her. **********Episode 5: "Bacanal Sangrento" (Bloody Gang-Bang): When the Almeida family travels to Cabo Frio, their maid organizes a gang-bang in their apartment, with tragic consequences.
    DirectorCarlo MossyStarsCláudio BarretoElena AndreaMaria Aparecida
  • Sentimental Education (2013)

    4. Sentimental Education

    20131h 24mNot Rated
    5.8 (194)
    Áurea is a sentimental older woman, who befriends teenager Áureo. They like each other, so she talks to him about herself, her spirituality, mysticism and existence itself. They become inseparable, so his jealous mother confronts her.
    DirectorJúlio BressaneStarsJosie AntelloBernardo MarinhoDébora Olivieri
  • Carmen Electra, Ike Barinholtz, Tony Cox, Gerard Facchini, Roland Kickinger, Vanessa Lachey, Walter Harris, Nicole Parker, Crista Flanagan, Gary 'G. Thang' Johnson, Matt Lanter, Kim Kardashian, and Devin Crittenden in Disaster Movie (2008)

    5. Disaster Movie

    20081h 27mPG-1315Metascore
    1.9 (97K)
    Over the course of one evening, an unsuspecting group of twenty-somethings find themselves bombarded by a series of natural disasters and catastrophic events.
    DirectorsJason FriedbergAaron SeltzerStarsCarmen ElectraVanessa LacheyNicole Parker
    Review: A disaster. Just unfunny nonsense. There is an unending sequence of awful jokes with no relevance for the story (story?!). It could be just one more spoof movie that gets references from the most popular films of the moment. Most of those parodies are bad movies and this could be just one of them. Though, "Disater Movie" was able to be placed among the worst of them as it mixes films which have no relation to each other (10,000 BC, Juno, No Country for Old Men, Wanted, High School Musical, Sex and the City, Indiana Jones, The Chronicles of Narnia, Jumper, Enchanted, Alvin and the Chipmunks, Speed Racer, Night at the Museum, Beowulf, Kung Fu Panda...), and there is no clever idea to make it works as something reasonable that makes sense. It is not the number of referenced movies that makes a parody good. There are some superheroes, like Hancock, Iron Man, Hellboy, the Hulk, Batman... but believe me, they will not save the day! Don't waste your time, just do not watch this messy crap.
  • 6. Night Out: Vampires

    2010Short
    5.7 (9)
    Four guys reminisce about a disastrous night out, which leads to Franco's over the top demise.
    DirectorFranco CastanStarsFranco CastanThomas J. ChurchillKameco Cuaolo
    This sexist and disgusting crap is available here: https://vimeo.com/13793958
  • All the colors of the night (2015)

    7. All the colors of the night

    20151h 11m
    5.1 (31)
    All the colors of the night offers a free reading of stories of violence and death that never come to light fully, but only as told and retold stories.
    DirectorPedro SeverienStarsSabrina GreveBrenda LígiaSandra Possani
  • Lonesome Cowboys (1968)

    8. Lonesome Cowboys

    19681h 49mX
    5.2 (608)
    Five lonesome cowboys get all hot & bothered at home en the range after confronting Ramona Alvarez and her nurse.
    DirectorsAndy WarholPaul MorrisseyStarsVivaTom HompertzLouis Waldon
  • Batman Dracula (1964)

    9. Batman Dracula

    196454mApproved
    4.6 (198)
    Andy Warhol's infamous lost campy classic charting the adventures of Batman two years before Adam West donned the Caped Crusader's wings in the classic TV show.
    DirectorAndy WarholStarsGregory BattcockDavid BourdonTally Brown
    Just a third of the picture survived. Half of it shows caped people doing nothing. The other half I just do not know what it shows.
  • Love Me Forever or Never (1986)

    10. Love Me Forever or Never

    19861h 50m
    6.7 (672)
    Young and recently separated couple meet in a modern house and start discussing their past relationship.
    DirectorArnaldo JaborStarsFernanda TorresThales Pan Chacon
  • Xuxa in Super Xuxa Contra Baixo Astral (1988)

    11. Super Xuxa Contra Baixo Astral

    19881h 26m
    3.7 (1K)
    Empowered by a magic crystal, a famous TV presenter and singer must defeat an evil entity from the sewers, a being fed by world negativity who has gotten sick of her good deeds.
    DirectorsAnna PenidoDavid SonnenscheinStarsXuxaGuilherme KaramNair Amorim
    I am not proud of having watched this on the movies.
  • Erin Brown in SpiderBabe (2003)

    12. SpiderBabe

    20031h 29mRVideo
    4.1 (978)
    A socially awkward young woman gets bitten by a radioactive spider and becomes a crime-fighting superhero and tries to defeat a nefarious super villain while going after any man (or woman) she wants to bed down with.
    DirectorJohnny CrashStarsErin BrownJulian WellsDarian Caine
  • Captain Battle: Legacy War (2013)

    13. Captain Battle: Legacy War

    20131h 30m
    1.3 (612)
    Sam Battle, injected with a secret serum that gained him super human strength and agility, battles the Neo Nazis, bound to resurrect the cloned corpse of Adolf Hitler.
    DirectorDavid PalmieriStarsCuyle CarvinAndrew J McGuinnessMarlene Mc'Cohen
  • Crô em Família (2018)

    14. Crô em Família

    20181h 34m
    3.9 (122)
    Crô's perfect life falls apart. In addition to facing a divorce, he will also have to deal with a group of peculiar individuals who appear claiming to be his family.
    DirectorCininha de PaulaStarsJoão BaldasseriniMonique AlfradiqueMarcelo Serrado
    Just one more unfunny and boring bad-quality film from Globo Filmes full of prejudices disguised as jokes against LGBT and the poor. I stopped to watch after 20 minutes. Horrible.
  • Consuelo Leandro and Agildo Ribeiro in Gugu, O Bom de Cama (1979)

    15. Gugu, O Bom de Cama

    19791h 22m
    5.5 (36)
    Homosexual manages to have a homosexual son, using voodoo.
    DirectorMário BenvenuttiStarsNair BelloMário BenvenuttiWalter Coletti
  • A Ilha dos Paqueras (1970)

    16. A Ilha dos Paqueras

    19701h 45m
    4.9 (65)
    While navigating from Rio de Janeiro to Vitória, the stewards Didi (Renato Aragão) and Dedé (Dedé Santana) and the inexperienced captain of the passenger vessel Anna Neri flirt with a group of models. In the return trip, Didi and Dedé simulate that the ship is sinking, and with another steward, they kidnap the captain and use a liferaft to go to a desert island with four models. But the island is the hidden place of a dangerous gang of smugglers, jeopardizing the group.
    DirectorFauzi MansurStarsRenato AragãoSueli FernandesDedé Santana
  • Iron Fist: The Dragon Unleashed (2008)

    17. Iron Fist: The Dragon Unleashed

    20089mVideo
    6.3 (11)
    DirectorDaniel GaliardiStarsAlbert LamontJeff NashS.K. Wong
  • O Crime da Cabra (2016)

    18. O Crime da Cabra

    20161h 30m
    7.2 (23)
    A country town has its routine interrupted by an unexpected crime: the money from the sale of a goat has been stolen. After investigations, it is discovered that the goat ate the money. What comes next is a litigious and hilarious debate to find out, who was aggrieved: the man who paid and did not keep the goat or the one who was the owner and did not receive for the sale.
    DirectorsTeresa AguiarAriane PortoStarsJoel BarbosaMatheus BragaLaura Cardoso
  • The Crusaders #357: Experiment in Evil! (2008)

    19. The Crusaders #357: Experiment in Evil!

    20081h 37m
    7.0 (77)
    A battered wife leaves her husband to become a super hero in this comic book come to life complete with panels , page turns and old fashioned novelty ads. Taking the identity of Furie, Connie Ferrantti joins a team of working class masked avengers called The Crusaders. It isn't long before she finds herself in conflict with their mysterious leader, The Ace of Spades. A one time hero of the golden age, The Ace of Spades is now walking a tightrope between good and evil. Can Furie save him from falling over the edge?
    DirectorRobb WolfordStarsBlake ArnoldRichard A. BeckerRuth W. Block
    The idea of playing the movie as if it were comic book pages is clever, but the film's campiness, awful amateur special effects and not serious or skilled acting are simply disgusting and not entertaining.
  • The Amazing Bulk (2012)

    20. The Amazing Bulk

    20121h 16mNot RatedVideo
    1.7 (4.4K)
    Henry 'Hank' Howard works as a scientist in a military lab, trying to create a superhuman formula but with little success. He is also in love with the daughter of his boss, a general. In an effort to earn his approval to marry his daughter, Henry tests the formula on himself, inadvertently transforming himself into a purple rage monster and leaving him at the mercy of those who wish to exploit his newfound power.
    DirectorLewis SchoenbrunStarsTerence LordingShevaun KastlRandal Malone
  • Kekkô Kamen 2 (1992)

    21. Kekkô Kamen 2

    19921h 19mVideo
    5.9 (44)
    DirectorYutaka AkiyamaStarsKenji YamaguchiRie NakanoRie Kondoh
  • Sisters of Sin (1997)

    22. Sisters of Sin

    19971h 26mNot RatedVideo
    3.4 (217)
    Johnny Blake is a man haunted by his past and dedicated to the destruction of the dark forces. But when three beautiful sisters - the spawn of a demon - seek to control Johnny's mind, body and his very soul, he must save not only himself but also the world from these bewitching sirens.
    DirectorGreg GriffinStarsJustin GorenceLara DaansHeather Lee McIntyre
  • Three Giant Men (1973)

    23. Three Giant Men

    19731h 21mUnrated
    4.0 (883)
    A crime wave is terrorizing Istanbul, and the police call in American superhero Captain America and Mexican wrestler Santo to end it.
    DirectorT. Fikret UçakStarsAytekin AkkayaDeniz ErkanatYavuz Selekman
  • Mortal Kombat: Annihilation (1997)

    24. Mortal Kombat: Annihilation

    19971h 35mPG-1311Metascore
    3.6 (60K)
    A group of martial-arts warriors has only six days to save the Earth from an extra-dimensional invasion.
    DirectorJohn R. LeonettiStarsRobin ShouTalisa SotoJames Remar
  • Land Without Bread (1933)

    25. Land Without Bread

    193330mShort
    7.3 (6.5K)
    A surrealist film, a pseudo-documentary portrait of Las Hurdes, a remote region of Spain where civilisation has barely developed, showing how the local peasants try to survive without even the most basic utilities and skills.
    DirectorLuis BuñuelStarsAbel JacquinAlexandre O'Neill
    Dishonest, sadistic and boring film by Buñuel.

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