Guilty pleasures
Okay, I'll be honest: I don't have any real "guilt" for liking any of these movies, maybe except Cannibal Holocaust.
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- DirectorClaudio FragassoStarsMichael Paul StephensonGeorge HardyMargo PreyA vacationing family discovers that the entire town they're visiting is inhabited by goblins, disguised as humans, who plan to eat them.Considered the "best worst movie," Troll 2 (which has nothing whatsoever to do with the first movie) lives up to its reputation.
- DirectorJohn R. LeonettiStarsRobin ShouTalisa SotoJames RemarA group of martial-arts warriors has only six days to save the Earth from an extra-dimensional invasion.What can I say? The first wasn't particularly good, but at least it didn't have me laughing at the immediately-dated CGI every couple scenes.
- DirectorRob HeddenStarsJensen DaggettKane HodderTodd CaldecottJason Voorhees is accidentally awakened from his watery grave and ends up stalking a ship full of graduating high-school students headed to Manhattan, New York.For that matter, most of the Friday the 13th sequels fall under this. This one, however, stands out to me as the most laughable, barring Jason X.
- DirectorLee HarryStarsEric FreemanJames NewmanElizabeth KaitanThe now-adult Ricky talks to a psychiatrist about how he became a murderer after his brother, Billy, died, which leads back to Mother Superior.Of "garbage day" fame.
- DirectorMichael Hamilton-WrightStarsLance HenriksenChelse SwainPhilippe BergeronA teenager girl mistakenly downloads the Mangler 2.0 computer virus into her highschool's new state of the art computer system and all hell breaks loose.Bad, but entertaining in a strange Uwe Boll sort of way, though more watchable.
- DirectorJosh BeckerStarsBruce CampbellRenée O'ConnorRemington FranklinAstronaut doctor Ivan Hood and his fellow astronaut Kelly return from their mission in space to find the world has been taken over by aliens. Now, Dr. Ivan Hood and Kelly must lead a revolution to free the human slaves from their alien masters.Actually pretty good for a SciFi/Syfy original. It's a cheesefest, of course, but shows a surprising amount of depth.
- DirectorMick GarrisStarsBrian KrauseMädchen AmickAlice KrigeA mother-and-son team of strange supernatural creatures move to a small town to seek out a young virgin to feed on.Death. By. Corn.
- DirectorPaul Michael GlaserStarsShaquille O'NealFrancis CapraAlly WalkerA troubled kid inadvertently releases a genie, who must grant him any three wishes he requests.The intentional humor isn't that funny. What's funny about this is how creepy Shaq is. This movie is a horror film disguised as a family comedy.
- DirectorWilliam LustigStarsWilliam SmithDavid 'Shark' FralickChristopher OgdenDesert Storm vet who was killed in combat rises from the grave on July Fourth, to kill the unpatriotic citizens of his hometown, after some teens burn an American flag over his burial site.
- CreatorMick GarrisStarsMargherita DonatoValerie WhiteBrandon RouthA television series broken down into 13 separate 60-minute films from premiere horror writers and directors.I was really picky with the majority of episodes, but I still enjoyed watching it overall.
- DirectorsMatt CunninghamErik GardnerStarsAimee BrooksReggie BannisterWeston BlakesleyA decade after the original massacre, another man obsessed over his machine ends with several murders and possession.A surprisingly scary sequel in the franchise, but it's still full of flaws. Still need to watch the first.
- DirectorOlaf IttenbachStarsBeate NeumeyerBernd MuggenthalerEllen FischerA young drug addict reads his little sister two macabre bedtime stories, one about a serial killer on a blind date, the other about a psychotic priest terrorizing his village.Trashy as fuck. Like a snuff film with a script penned by GG Allin. The gore is impressive, though.
- DirectorJuan Piquer SimónStarsChristopher GeorgeLynda Day GeorgeFrank BrañaThe co-eds of a Boston college campus are targeted by a mysterious killer who is creating a human jigsaw puzzle from their body parts.More over-the-top 80s horror sleaze with awful acting.
- DirectorRuggero DeodatoStarsRobert KermanFrancesca CiardiPerry PirkanenAn anthropologist ventures into the Amazon rainforest on a rescue mission, where he recovers footage shot by a film crew documenting their disastrous encounters with local cannibal tribes.I wanted to hate this one. I knew of its reputation. Being an animal lover, I wanted to hate it to the very core of its being. Once I saw it, I really couldn't bring myself to hate it, although its hypocritical commentary is alone seems like enough reason to not truly like it. God, I'm so desensitized.
- DirectorKevin GreutertStarsCostas MandylorMark RolstonBetsy RussellAgent Strahm is dead, and FBI agent Erickson draws nearer to Hoffman. Meanwhile, a pair of insurance executives find themselves in another game set by Jigsaw.Like Friday the 13th, I utterly despise what they did to this franchise. The first movie was fantastic. Then the sequels came (II and III were probably the best of that lot), and traded most of the psychological drama for shallow gore and violence for its own sake. However, this one surprisingly stands out. At the very least, it carries a powerful reality-based message, unlike the rest, even II and III.
- DirectorArthur CullipherStarsShane BeasleyKelsey CarlisleEllie ChurchAfter unearthing the lost slasher film from 1978 in Found (2012), the now-grown-up skull-masked boy abducts and tortures helpless women. Now, he needs one more victim. Will her blonde-haired head end up as the Killer's latest trophy?A good number of movies on this list from when I first created it fall under the "so bad, it's hilarious" label (in fact, I can vaguely remember that being the original title). Next to Cannibal Holocaust, Headless best fits the truest definition of "guilty pleasure". It's got no real redeeming qualities that could make it a "good" movie. All it is is senseless gore and rampant misogyny that serves no purpose other than to disturb audiences, and there's no reason to pretend otherwise. That being said, I liked it. The gore effects were amazing, if a bit repetitive. And plus I have a bit of a love affair with retraux-themed works, especially horror.
