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Suppress your bitter aching loneliness this holiday by watching some very anti-Valentine’s Day cinematic relationships on Shudder! We here at Trailers From Hell have culled through all of the least romantic flicks currently showing on that spookiest of movie streaming platforms, and found some intriguing viewing fodder if you’re less-than-receptive to the typical amorous pablum.

Valentine (2001)

This hokey slasher, starring such staples of the early aughts as Denise Richards and David Boreanaz (plus a pre-Grey’s Anatomy Katherine Heigl). A serial killer wanders the streets of San Francisco (with a Los Angeles interlude) wearing a creepy marble Cupid mask, using a variety of slick household items, including an electric drill and a hot iron. Not the healthiest form of romantic self-expression for our Cupid.

White Zombie (1932)

The Haitian-set Bela Lugosi horror classic so memorable it inspired the name of a multiplatinum hard rock band five decades later! In White Zombie,...

It’s yet another masterpiece from the Italian director Francesco Rosi, adapting a fiction novel about a political murder conspiracy that is altogether too much of a good fit for the troubled Italy of 1975. Crime star Lino Ventura is the incorruptible detective investigating a series of killings of high-level judges, who begins to intuit that his superiors want the murders to continue. Dark and moody, Rosi’s picture is impeccably directed for a kind of nagging, uneasy suspense, with frightening hints that Ventura is being drawn into a bigger, more sinister frame. With Charles Vanel, Max von Sydow and Fernando Rey, and music by Piero Piccioni. The insightful audio commentary is by Alex Cox. The original Italian title is even more blood-curdling: Cadaveri eccelenti.

Illustrious Corpses

Blu-ray

Kino Classics

1976 / Color / 1:85 widescreen / 121 min. / Cadaveri eccellenti; The Context / Street Date September 28, 2021 / available through Kino Lorber / 24.95

Starring: Lino Ventura, Tino Carraro, Marcel Bozzuffi,...