We Are Gathered Here

I've NEVER seen a film where I hated every character. Except Rachel, she started strong and then had her balls cut off. Speaking of which, the two "guys" have NONE! I literally, term used correctly, wanted to see them all doused with gasoline and set on fire. THAT'S how much each character sucked. I kept hoping it'd turn into a horror flick. I had no problem with the ending, but you can't feel bad for anyone when you want to slap the sh#t out of them. Steer clear of watching this dumpster fire from Uranus. And you're thinking, at least there's Rachel. Nope. The polar vortex that is the suckatude of all the characters eventually brings her down as well. It was like in Freaks. Gooble Gobble, One of us, One of us. Once she joined, it was a downward spiral. I took 3 days after watching it to write this. And I still can't stop hating those characters. I mean, I REALLY hate them all. Except early Rachel.

One of the wettest films I've ever seen. From the actors/acting & everything else - just wet. This is the parboiled result of middle class university educated millennials who are scared of their own shadows. Wet! Wet! Wet! With no sweet little mystery insight.

If this film was a tweet it would be second-hand outraged. If this film was surface cleaner it would be watered down lemon.

If I come across as being annoyed in this review, that's because I am. I wasted time on this dropped bowl of watery porridge.

This movie is insufferable. It should never have been filmed as a full-length feature until they were able to put together a deserving script. This is a bunch of whiny, entitled caricatures talking in circles because the plot calls for them to be indecisive. The actors have to agonize over how to resolve a situation that would take anyone else about 10 seconds to fix. The stakes could not be lower, and these people could not be more unlikable. Avoid.

Remember, this is a low budget Indy film. If you watch this film with that in mind, it's a very enjoyable movie. If you think you're going to see Sex in the City or 50 First Dates, you'll be disappointed.

We've seen this before...many, many times. What was it called? My best friend's pasty-white runaway Opie-looking bride? Something like that. The dialogue seemed to have been entirely ad-libbed with zinger lines like "This is a messed-up situation" and "I'm carpe dieming." Someone really said that.

Even the guy's house was insipid. It looked like a cheap motel room that they rented by the hour. And I realize this is a low-budget affair, but buy a few lights next time. The entire movie was shot in his dumpy hotel room, at night, in the dark.

The only thing they got right about this is that it wasn't very long, but deeply boring people talking for 82 minutes is an eternity that I couldn't endure. I had to fast-forward through the trailer on YouTube, no kidding.

Once again, this movie page has been bombed by people who have only written a single review.