Bergerac

Firstly, opening titles and music: complete mess, a weedy irritating noise with the original sound track muffled.

Which suits most of the script: Well over half was incoherent mumbling, not helped by the bloke bashing with the hammer in the next studio. The acting was not so much "wooden" as "concrete". The cast appointed by the United Nations. The police station appears to be a disused block of flats. Apart from some of the cast sounding as if they were reading their lines, many were sitting around for no reason at all, not contributing to the (lack of) action. Not a hint of humour, character, personality from anybody, as if it was all filmed in flat grey.

Dub it with american accents, rename it "Cop Guys" or somesuch. We watched an old copy of "Heartbeat" recently, and would advise Jason Durr as Bergerac, and Mark Jordon as Crozier. Oh, and good though she normally is, poor Zoe Wanamaker as "Charlie Hungerford" just does not cut it. Total drearyness, best avoided without anti-depressants. Waste of money. Ivor Macadam.

As others have said this is a lazy adaptation of an old classic. The story arc which goes over six episodes could have been done in two, the misanthropic cop who can't communicate with anybody let alone his daughter who is in desperate need of support is so old and overwritten it is ridiculous. The constant railing against authority which was nuanced and effective in the original is just a blunt hammer in this one. The main actor himself I'm not sure about if it's the script or his delivery but it is so wooden and unsympathetic is a hard watch. I must admit I fast forwarded through most of this as I guess who done it early on, and frankly the male "intuitive " posturing was so bizarre - literally just yelling at his boss in front of the team - let me just... I was like can you not...

There is nothing barely redeemable about this remake. The storyline isn't new, the acting is almost as bad as a children's school play and none of the characters had any depth.

It's incredulous that this even got funding. The 'whispering' DCI character, the back stabbing DI and lack of basic police procedure we know from other crime shows. There was no drama, no edge of the seat tension and no real motivation to watch the remaining episodes than to at least give it a chance.

Add to this a complete lack of plausible 'rich' people behaviour - we know any wealthy person would have used their private connections to sideline Bergerac sooner. It's dubious anyone had watched the original show or had a clue about how to write an evolving story.

Like many here, I'd been looking forward to this series having loved the John Nettles Bergerac so many decades ago.

But this?

We nearly gave up after 3 episodes. But we decided to continue despite our doubts. After all, all series have the odd disappointing episode so no doubt it would get better.

It didn't.

After episode 4, we both wished we'd given up after the 3rd episode. It was even worse that the previous episodes. What the hell. We've come this far, we may as well finish. Only two episodes to go.

After the 5th. Only 1 to go. That's the best I could say.

You get the idea.

I think it was mid-way through perhaps the 3rd episode when we realized just how bad this was getting and how absurd some of what was going on that I turned jokingly to my wife during one scene and said "They did it", referring to the least likely character in the entire series and probably the only one that any reasonable person would have excluded from the start because the idea was ridiculous. No way they could have been the murder? It was an absurd concept.

Of course it turned out to be them.

An attempt at a plausible explanation was given in the closing scenes of the final episode but it just didn't work. Even the actors didn't seem to believe it at this stage. The writers just decided that they'd go all out, choose the character it couldn't possibly have been, and try to construct a totally unconvincing motive for the murder.

Even during the inevitable confession screen when being interviewed by Bergerac, the actor portaying the guilty party seemed to be saying to themselves, "Me? It was me? That's ridiculous. Why am I saying these lines? Nobody is going to believe me. Is it to late to get out of my contract? Is Coronation Street looking for cast members because anything must be better than this nonsense."

I don't blame the actor; I blame whoever wrote the plot. If the actor doesn't even believe the lines, then why do the writers think the audience will?

What rubbish.

Every episode had numerous incidents where characters would do or say something leaving us shaking our heads saying to each other that it simply wasn't credible. Nobody would act that way.

Well, maybe in Jersey they do.

They didn't in the original Bergerac but maybe things have changed.

With Phillip Glenister as one of the main characters, who is a brilliant actor may I add. His dialogue, his scripting and his acting in this has been totally wooden. Did he just not feel the script and saw it as a payday?!

The 6 episodes, are dire, slow and to be honestly totally mind numbing.

One murder and an abduction attempt. Every episode has just ended with a can I be bothered to find out who did this?!

This is supposed to be a murder mystery, so where is the suspense?! The intrigue?! No where.

Characters who I can't give a s*** about, they are ignorant, condescending, quiet and whispering at times. A DI who makes me wince.

Give me the John Nettles version over this!