X-Ray: Massacre no Hospital

Early entry into the 80s slasher film craze is surprisingly decent and is one of the few times Golan-Globus Productions ("Invasion U.S.A," "Breakin'," "Revenge of the Ninja," etc.) made a slasher picture. The opening prologue has an unpopular boy named Harold leaving a Valentine's Day card on the doorstep for pretty girl Susan. Susan and her friend find the card, laugh about it, and crumple up the Valentine. Unbeknownst to them, Harold has been watching the whole time. While Susan is getting some cake from the kitchen, she returns to her friend murdered while the creepy Harold stares at her through the window before running off. That's all the set-up you need for this slasher film, which the adult Susan, played by former playmate Barbi Benton, visits the hospital one day for some test results where she is stalked by an adult Harold who is still in love with her. From there, the bodycount continues to grow and just about every male in the hospital might be Harold (it seems like this hospital almost exclusively hired by creepy dudes). Directed and co-written by schlockmeister Boaz Davidson, who's made charming garbage since the 70s like "The Last American Virgin" all the way until today with lame films like "Mega Snake" and "Leatherface" (though he's also produced some classier films like "The Expendables," Rambo 4," and the underrated "Drive Angry"). The plot, characters, and story are pretty non-existent, but Davidson does deliver a good number of suspenseful and creepy hospital themed horrors, particularly an uncomfortable exam of Benton by a creepy doctor that seems to last forever. The film's bloody finale is also quite memorable. There are some slow parts in the second act of the film that drag, but it's not a bad film if you're in the mood for a throwback style slasher that you may have missed. FUN FACT! The film was photographed by Nicholas Josef von Sternberg, son of famed director Josef von Sternberg ("The Blue Angel" "Morocco" "Shanghai Express").

Of all the slasher films that came out in 1981, this is definitely one of them. That said, for some small reason this film sticks out as a perfect example of the slasher film. With it's goofy plot revolving around the identity of the killer, and gratuitous Benton nudity, one really can't go wrong with this title. It's not a great film, but it's got all the key elements of the slasher film, and for that, at least it succeeds on those terms.

The movie starts off with a young boy who obviously has a crush on this girl. When he sends her a valentine card, she laughs at it. This must have made the boy go psycho. Cut to the present. The girl is now a grown woman, who is going to get a routine check up at her hospital. The killer shows up at the hospital and begins to methodically slice and dice the hospital staff to get to the woman. This movie has some great suspense and atmosphere. The acting was a little below average, but the movie is too good to be missed.

This film is one of the most underrated slasher films of the early 80's. It has okay camera work, good acting, fluid direction, recycled plot, etc. Barbi Benton plays Susan Jeremy. She enters a city hospital to get the results of a recent physical. From the moment she enters the hospital, she is approached by weird doctors, old and strange patients, and is forced to undergo one of the most exploitive examinations in movie history (THE DOCTOR TAKES HER BLOOD PRESSURE AFTER PLACING HER HAIR JUST SO YOU HAVE A GOOD LOOK AT BARBI'S NIPPLES). Soon you learn that there is a crazed killer after Susan and he's out for revenge. Though exploitive in some areas, the film has its fair share of good, solid film making. The script is pretty weak and so is the ending but the direction makes up for it. The camera work is okay but just not as fluid as HALLOWEEN II's (which has a similar plot). All in all > 7/10

Forgive the pretentious summary, but i thought this film was effective precisely for all the elements other reviewers seemed to criticise. It IS fairly well shot (the dark bits are hard work) and the editing's sharp. With a big bombastic orchestral score and lots of OTT moments, this is a cheesy film with plenty of daft false scares and the like, but it's quite nightmarish too. The clichéd parts are tensely handled. Maybe I'm desensitized to bad cinema at the moment, having consumed plenty of terrible 80s slashers recently, but I thought this was pretty good. Little touches like the horrible old women sharing Barbi Benton's hospital ward, cackling like the witches from Macbeth, added to the absurd bad-dream quality. The murder scenes are well handled, violent and rough but not that splattery.

This film has a similar feel to something like 'Don't Answer The Phone!' or 'The Centerfold Girls', serious in intent and not really 'camp' in any way. It's obviously 'bad cinema', but artfully done.