Jack and the Beanstalk

Oh dear! Where to start? Well, this version of the classic fairy tale (which could kindly be called ''lousy'') was filmed in a long shuttered Florida amusement park called "Pirate's World". WHY it was called that is anyone's guess--but a documentary exploring that subject would have made more sense than this atrocity. The cast consists of "actors" so stiff they could pass for Redwood trees. The musical score sounds like a 6th grade class project. The "production values" consist of costumes which look like what the cast wore to an audition (though there probably wasn't one for this film) and the "sets" were probably constructed in somebody's back yard. There are the usual weird inconsistencies-- The Giant sports a Southern accent(!) Jack himself is a decidedly unvirile hero,and he has a sister, who has a boyfriend, both of whom add absolutely nothing to the plot--except more bad acting. And for a movie filmed at an amusement park, there's little evidence of it. But then, maybe THAT'S why the place shut down. Producer (and nudie specialist) Barry Mahon filmed three kiddie gems, but this one is the worst, and if you saw the other two "The Wonderful Land Of Oz" and "Thumbelina" that says it all. Both "Jack" and "Oz" are currently available on DVD as a double feature. An if you can watch them without laughing your head off, you need a serious medical check-up.

Jack and the Beanstalk (1970)

** (out of 4)

Jack (Mitchell Poulos) is sent to town to sell the family cow but Honest John (Chris Brooks) convinces him to trade it for some magic beans. Jack blindly does this but sure enough a magical beanstalk grows where Jack is able to climb it and go up against a giant.

Barry Mahon made a number of children's movies towards the end of his career. All of this was done after years of making sexploitation and exploitation picture but I must say that this one here is decent enough as long as you don't go into it expecting anything other than low-budget camp.

I'm going to guess that this movie was shot for a couple thousand dollars because the special effects are certainly bad and all the scenes dealing with the "small" Jack going up against the "large" giant are really obviously done. The film was shot on a few sets and it really looks like they just re-enacted a play that might have been done at the amusement park.

As I said, no one should be going into this film expecting a "good" movie. The performances are what you'd expect to see at an amusement park and there's no question that not much is good on the technical side of things. JACK AND THE BEANSTALK thankfully runs just 63- minutes so it never overstays its welcome.