The Graves

The two main actresses look really good in this. And one of them reminded me of Olivia Wilde somehow (although I can't say why). Other than that, you also have two "horror" heavyweights in the cast. But it also feels like quite a few characters got crammed into this. Technically done very solid, but the story might have needed a few tweaks here and there to work out better.

The usual "Duh" moments are not absent, quite the contrary and of course, although pretty feisty and not always in the "victim" role, our lead women do quite a few "stupid" things. Things that go against common sense that is.

What you should check out though, is the DVD of the movie. I only heard the first couple of minutes, but the commentaries on the Disc seem genuinely entertaining! Rent it and give it a listen (the thing they say about the baby is worth the rent money alone). Not great by long shot, but still far from the worst movies I've seen.

Wow……and to think that all of the movies in the After Dark Horror-fest would be somewhat, oh I don't know…enjoyable? Because of what I had to deal with this first film, The Graves,……well, it wasn't pretty.

The Graves, a miserable little turd fest of a film, is about two girls, Meghan and Abby, going on a last trip together before Meghan leaves for New York. They go to comic book stores (which, I'm sorry, these girls look like they've never set foot in a comic shop in their lives) and talk about how Lady Death is the most awesome comic book ever…….really? (And don't worry, this is only one of the many faults of this movie.) They then stop in a diner (which is so far out of the way that the first girl to die in the original Nightmare on Elm Street is stuck waiting there), and they're lead to Skull Mine, which is said to be a ghost town after some brutal murders took place there. And then, guess what? Everything goes to hell……what a shock….

My first point is Brian Pulido. I should just stop there, but I'll guess I'll keep going. If you don't know who he is, he is one of the WORST comic book writers from the 1990s and the 2000s. He's responsible for writing such terrible comic books such as Lady Death (which I referred to before) and Evil Ernie. So when I heard he wrote, directed, and produced this piece of utter crap, I already knew it was going to be terrible. He doesn't have a clue what he's doing and he should stop thinking he can do anything creative.

And some of the acting in here is atrocious. You have your two female protagonists who can't act their way out of a wet paper bag. I mean, they have scenes where they are just SO melodramatic in scenes where they're in total danger! Also, you have Tony Todd……..really? Tony, why did you chose this? Did your wife need a new car? Did your daughter need more money to get into the collage she wanted? I mean, you were the candy man! Your cartoon-styled acting in this is so bad, that I almost broke down and cried.

Now, if there is anything redeemable about this film, it's that Bill Mosely (yep, Devils Rejects Bill Mosely) plays a guy called the "Pig Man", who is just a guy who puts on a fake pig nose and likes to kill people. I have to say that whenever he was on screen, a shimmer of light helped me get through this film.

But, all in all, there is almost (almost!) nothing to like about this film. It's not scary, it's not funny, it's not dramatic, It's not anything! And if it weren't for Bill Mosely, I would give this film a flat out zero.

To put my comment in context, I love a good B movie, such as the Tarrantino's "Deathproof", or Peter Jackson's "Braindead", so I approached the film expecting to enjoy it.

I watched this during the "Grimm Up North" horror film festival in the Printworks in Manchester, UK. I could find nothing about it to recommend it. The acting was poor and the plot obvious, lacking any twists. The film completely failed to generate any sort of suspense, shock, or in fact, horror! All in all, extremely disappointing.

I actually enjoyed the short, shown prior to the film, much more than the feature!

This movie was absolutely horrible! It broke my heart too because I was really up to watching it with my all time favorite vocalist Randy Blythe, and two other great actors, Tony Todd and Bill Mosely. But seriously it hurt to watch this! It was if it was thrown together overnight, the acting was cheaply done even Tony Todd's parts but I don't blame the actors. I blame the director! It had no thrill or suspense to it, it didn't even resonate off any suspense when they built up the moment to try and keep you in suspense low and behold nothing happens......I would not recommend this to anyone its not even good to watch for a good gory B flick.

I truly wish that I had had the foresight to read a review before watching this film. Tony Todd's presence couldn't even get more than a 1/10 from me. I watched this film 2 years ago and still remember the title of it only so I can use it as a cautionary tale to friends. I have watched my fair share of films, and a decent amount of them were poorly written and acted. However, this film takes the cake as being so terrible that not even the poor quality of it can produce a laugh. I feel like the people who spawned this film had to say something to the effect of "Hey everyone, let's take two semi-attractive women with no acting experience and give them a garbage script, Tony Todd, a camera we no longer use and all of the pocket change we have on us right now, and see if we can't turn a profit."

If this film actually somehow did turn a profit, I think it was somewhere in the range of 4 McDoubles-20 Chicken McNuggets. If it made more of a profit than that, I'm going to be shooting films all weekend. I think a movie of me making wookie noises at a cut out poster of Liam Neeson will sell better than this piece of trash. I'll call it Nell.