Como Conquistar Uma Mulher

Ignore the two glowing reviews from studio plants. This movie is horrible. It isn't funny or provocative, just boring and predictable.

Josh Meyers isn't funny. Kristen Ritter is hot but not funny. Ian Somerhalder is some sort of masturbatory fantasy for the gay and cat lady community. He also isn't funny.

I've never seem Lindsay Richards in anything, but she is pretty hot, and from Texas. But not funny. So to recap, this movie is not funny or entertaining. So if you are looking to spend more than an hour not laughing at something, this is for you. If you have lost your cable or satellite feeds and are tired of watching static, this movie is for you.

In Los Angeles, the clumsy Andy Conners (Josh Meyers) works at the Fearless Records selecting new talents. Andy is in love and engaged to Lauren Baker (Krysten Ritter) for one year but he is unable to satisfy Lauren in bed. Further, he has never told Lauren that he loves her.

Andy tells his problem to his best friend Layne Wilson (Eugene Byrd) and they research how to satisfy Lauren with an orgasm. Meanwhile Lauren is promoted in her company but she needs to be transferred to Chicago. When her colleague Daniel Meltzer (Ian Somerhalder) comes to Los Angeles to convince Lauren to move to Chicago, they discover that they had been friends in the childhoods. Andy misunderstands the relationship between Daniel and Lauren and believes that she is cheating on him. Will Andy lose Lauren to Daniel?

"How to Make Love to a Woman" is a silly romantic comedy about lack of communication between two lovers. The predictable story entertains but Josh Meyers is not funny enough for his role. Nevertheless Krysten Ritter is hot and sexy and makes the film work reasonably. There are very harsh reviews in IMDb, but the comedy is not so bad. My vote is five.

Title (Brazil): "Como Conquistar Uma Mulher" ("How to Win over a Woman")

People who don't have the slightest idea of what comedy is shouldn't call what ever movie they make to be funny. "How To Make Love To a Woman" is anything but funny, its boring and awful. the story is so old and feels like the writer just copied bits from other successful comedies. The acting in this movie can be compared to actors who perform in soft-core porn movies, imitating copied dialogues, trying to be funny and instead making a complete fool out of themselves. so if one day you are having a normal day and want to know what it feels like if you slam your head in the wall for more than one hour than please go and watch this movie.

Oh my. This movie is so stale I felt compelled to register so I could post a warning to anyone above an 85 IQ. Cliché, another cliché, yet another cliché. The best part was the somewhat clever opening credits score. Most comedies open with something funny. This is the one cliché the movie left out! If you like watching average comedians perform below average, this is your movie. That's all to say but I cannot post without ten lines. So don't read anymore, I'm just trying to make it to ten lines because spending any more time writing about this awful and insulting movie is a waste of my time at this point. I hope that's at least ten lines.

The plot of romantic comedies are never their strong suit but this movie didn't offer a single interesting or creative approach to the tired old formula (boy-meets-girl, boy-gets-girl, happy-couple-time, trouble-in-paradise, break-up to make-up, airport scene). Most romantic comedies work because the characters can be identified with and viewers care about them enough to look past the poor plot. Throw in some funny lines and comedy and your movie "works". This movie isn't funny and the main character isn't well written. Seems to be an emotional and mental 12 year old in a grown man's body. The acting doesn't help either.

All in all the movie was so bad that I lost interest in the characters and the story. I spend my time getting frustrated over the very very poor focusing of the camera. A shallow depth of field with characters apparently moving so fast that the focus can't follow. Dialogues where the focus can't keep track with the character that is talking. Before the person who's talking is in focus, the next guy is already talking. Scenes where the focus between different takes is obviously not the same (Somerhalder in the Italian restaurant scene). One shot of the scene is sharp, the next shot is soft. When they're on the beach I spent my time looking into the reflection of Byrd's sunglasses where I could clearly see the guy holding the reflector. That is some really horrible stuff.