Snow White: A Deadly Summer

An absolute abomination. Shot like a porno with all the sex removed. It got off to a bad start as once shot of a staircase started to drift off to the side as though the camera man had nodded off for a split second. This film tries to do a little modern day twist on Snow White, with a 'troubled' young girl sent off to camp by her wicked stepmother. She is soon having hallucinations and murders take place. The epic scale of the awfulness is worth the two stars as it did entertain. Watch Eric "I was in The Dark Knight 4 years ago" Roberts try and hide his shame. I'm pretty sure he agreed to be in the film but wasn't paid to act. Like hiring a hooker to wait tables. "You can have my face and my name, but the acting will be a little extra". The director decided not to take him up on this offer. Maureen McCormick of Brady Bunch fame is the evil stepmother who appears to have taken some Giblin Formula as she talks to herself in mirrors. All the nighttime scenes are actually shot during the day which leaves them looking bright and blue. The costumes involve black T-shirts and jeans, which the script tries to pass off as the camp uniform, but when the sheriff arrives with nothing to set him apart other than a plastic badge clipped to his belt, you realise that the actors are probably supplying their own clothes. Heck, the casting call probably stated as much. The film drags itself to feature length, with an end that makes such little sense it was like the punchline to a huge practical joke. Brilliantly awful and should be enjoyed with many beers and a few close friends.

There are bad directors (the kind that squander a Big budget, deliver a smelly turd, and are never heard from again), and then there are Bad Directors!!! (who can deliver a finished product for a couple thousand which, regardless of quality, will turn a profit, and who have more work waiting for them than they can possibly handle). I'm pretty worshipful of the latter. William Beaudine. Roger Corman. Ed Wood. Doris Wishman. And undisputed King of the current crop of Bad Directors!!!, the Schlockmaster General, Mr. David DeCoteau. Remember that name. not because I expect you to worship Bad Cinema as I do - quite the opposite - because so many of you expect some kinda guarantee of being at least a little bit entertained when you invest 90 minutes of your life in a movie. When you see D.D.C.'s name attached to one, that Ain't Gonna Happen (when you're done reading this, zip thru the pages of 1-star-or-less user reviews for this one if you need further evidence). Some Fun Facts about D.D.C: He's Very Gay (me too, so no judgment is intended), and has frequently worked under female pseudonyms; while he's never made an overtly gay film, his specialty area is in the copious display of the H-O-T male form - mostly in tighty whiteys (type '1313' into the search engine for an impressive list of some but not all of his tighty whitey epics) - I once emailed him, offering to pay him $10/hr to work in his casting office - no response; there is always Someone You've Hear Of in his casts, generally wayyy past their marketability (McCormick and Roberts get the honors in this one),and they're always awful (he once actually got Christopher Plummer to sign on - if I ever hear a good story about that one, I'll share it); and what I said earlier about the low-budget hacks having no shortage of work....it's 2013 now - he's made around 30 movies since 2010!! So remember....Corman received an honorary Oscar. Wood is a major cult figure. So there IS some glory to making BAD movies, just as there's Great Fun to be had watching them. Just so long as you know what you're getting into.

The only thing I can say about this film is that I hope they were trying to make some kind of parody.

It's so incredibly bad it's destined to end up in the IMDb worst movies of all time.

The night scenes were shot in the day just with a filter. Due to the production values I thought I'd accidentally hired porn for the first 30 minutes (if only).

The acting seemed like they just picked random people off the street as part of an experiment.

The script is possibly the worst part of the film, and the story, I've experienced more suspense going to the bathroom.

Save yourself the effort and only watch this film if you enjoy really really seriously awful movies with no redeeming features whatsoever. It's actually not even so bad it's good, it's just bad.

Well I heard Maureen McCormick hasn't been in too many films in a long time, so I was surprised to see her in this one! And Eric Roberts, wow I guess he will take any acting job. This is a crappy movie, I cannot think of one good thing to say about it except some of the sexy girls. The story stinks, the action is boring, the plot is bad, absolutely no craft went into making this movie. It was just a movie for the sake of making a movie. There is not suspense or entertainment value, I did watch the whole movie but I could have turned it off at almost any point and not cared! The story and the characters were just not interesting in any way to get you to care anything about them or what happens in the movie. This is about as bad as a movie can be!

Nowadays it's popular to clock in on the success of blockbusters. Snow White and The Huntsman (2012) is a perfect example. So here we have it, Snow White.

First of all, this has nothing to do with the story of Snow White, it's just about a girl being called Snow. Guess what, her stepmother doesn't like her and she and her husband decide to send her to a boot camp. There all her mates are killed one by one. Looks promising but it just isn't.

It was fun to see Maureen McCormick back again since I have seen her for the first time in Moonshine County Express (1977) as Sissy Hammer. Eric Roberts as dad is just in it for a teaser on the DVD cover but again it surprised me what kind of turkeys these days he's in. Another face I recognized was Shanley Caswell from Detention (2011). But it's really the story itself that makes it almost unwatchable.

The story is really a turkey were they tried to bring supernatural elements in it. sadly , they failed. Just have a look to the stepmother talking to the mirror, that rang a bell (the real Snow White). And Snow White, when she's having dreams, she sees what is going to happen to the next victim. All night sequences are shot day for night and her dreams are as stupid again as it can get. Nothing happens and it's all so ridiculous.

This is a perfect example how bad a movie can become. If you can watch it without touching the remote control and pushing the fast forward or the eject button well, then you really like turkeys.

Gore 0/5 Nudity 0/5 Effects 0/5 Story 0/5 Comedy 0/5