Transmorphers: Mech Beasts

This movie is a masterclass in tell not show. This movies dedication to telling everything that is happening instead of showing a single shot of it is admirable. None of the stuff they say makes any sense at all, so they keep reiterating it to try and get the point across. There are entire scenes that are just alternating shots of characters faces while THEY watch the action and narrate it with gunshots in the background without showing us anything except one or two shots unrelated to the setting the actors are in. We have watched close to if not over 100 bad movies, many of them Asylum. This is the second lowest rated one on our list. Don't watch this movie. I guess you could put it on in the background if you want to just listen to the same 15 words said over and over and over for an hour and a half.

Ever wanted to watch a movie that had the most boring plot-slop per every excruciating second of its runtime? This is the move for you, then! On a more serious note, this movie was.. something. The CGI was goofy and sure gave me a chuckle, and I did quite enjoy the design of the robots. But everything else was what I can only describe as slop. The characters? Basic and boring. The scenes are how they were filmed? Even a stick in the mud would be more interesting. However, that isn't even the worst part! Clearly, from the name to the marketing, this is a clone of Transformers: Rise of The Beasts. Well, less of a clone, and more like if you played a game of telephone through the director's office, and then made a movie based off of that. Overall, do not watch this movie. It sucks, and is not even good to hate-watch.

Of course The Asylum would be pushing something like "Transmorphers: Mech Beasts" out on the masses, just in time for the 2023 movie "Transformers: Rise of the Beasts". Yup, you can always count on your buddies at The Asylum to conjure up another mockbuster.

Needless to say that I wasn't harboring any expectations for writer Joe Roche to produce any particularly extraordinary script or storyline for the movie, as I am well-familiar with previous movies from The Asylum. Yet, I still opted to give "Transmorphers: Mech Beasts" a fair chance, as every now and then there is actually a fairly adequate movie from The Asylum.

I wasn't familiar with the majority of actors and actresses on the cast list in "Transmorphers: Mech Beasts". Well, aside from Tom Arnold, of course. And that is usually something I enjoy when I watch movies. The acting performances in the movie were actually adequate enough.

For a movie titled "Transmorphers: Mech Beasts", I have to admit that I wasn't expecting anything extraordinary in terms of special effects and CGI. But I will say that The Asylum actually managed to pull this one off nicely enough. Sure, you're not in for CGI effects that will blow your mind or bedazzle you, but for a movie such as this, it should be said that the CGI effects were actually adequate enough.

Granted, the 2023 movie "Transmorphers: Mech Beasts" certainly was an improvement to the 2007 "Transmorphers" movie, also from The Asylum. As for in comparison the 2009 movie "Transmorphers: Fall of Man", I don't know, as I haven't seen that movie. And it shouldn't be necessary to say that your money and time is better spent watching "Transformers: Rise of the Beasts".

My rating of "Transmorphers: Mech Beasts", from director Michael Su, lands on a three out of ten stars.

I'm sorry that you got tricked into watching Transmorphers: Mech Beasts because you can't read.

You are not worthy of this movie. Tom Arnold's acting is inspiring.

It's a play on Terminator, not Transformers, and a good one at that.

Oh, the graphics aren't good enough for you? Make better ones yourself then, I'm sure you're capable.

The lighting is good, the settings are good, if you can't appreciate a campy low-budget sci-fi satire which borders on interesting then go somewhere else.

You people just don't get it. This movie is made for we who are sick of blockbusters and want some bad actors and writers trying to recite technical jargon from memory.

I really need to question my own intelligence because I watch the trash vomited up by Asylum and I expect that this one might actually be a good movie. It absolutely NEVER is a good movie, each one seems to plumb the depths of just how bad a film can be!

The acting is always lousy, the dialogue nonsensical and the plot an un-understandable mixture of scientific gobbley gook that makes no sense.

Then there is the 1980s Atari special effects that look miserably cartoonish. The settings are always some abandoned warehouse with trash scattered around and relatively no damage considering it is ALWAYS the site of an epic battle just moments before!

This one actually sets forth that the ENTIRE world's survival depends on a sergeant and her two kids plus their stepfather! And venture a guess who are the only people to survive after they save the world!

What a pile of manure!!!